Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

This episode has been a very long time in the making: Richard Rohr is a Franciscan friar, the founder of the Center for Action and Contemplation, and one of the most profound teachers. Today, we explore the prescient themes from his new book The Tears of Things: Prophetic Wisdom for an Age of Outrage. He helps us to make sense of disorder, evil, anger, and grief—and he helps us to find our fulcrum of growth. He makes the case that the impulse to deconstruct is ultimately less useful than the impulse to construct, or reform. He breaks down why we fall into scapegoating, and the reputation lie. And we talk about why he puts action before contemplation.

For more on Richard Rohr and all the show notes, head over to my Substack.

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Chelsea Handler shares my favorite stories from her new book I’ll Have What She’s Having, along with a few poignant lessons she’s gleaned while growing up. She talks about a pivotal conversation she had after Jane Fonda called her in; what she learned about the futility of defensiveness in therapy; and how we might tend to our jealous thoughts. We also talk about how Chelsea has big-sistered so many women, including me. And what I’ve learned from how comfortable she is with her own shadow and humanity, and how she does not project onto others.

For the show notes, head over to my Substack.

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After finally getting to meet the incredible Richard Rohr (interview coming to the podcast soon), I sat down to reflect on: The unlikely road I’ve been on to become so immersed in Christian writers (was never on my bingo card), and what I misunderstood in my original interpretation of Jesus. What I’ve learned about dying to your small self and growing into your big self. What it means to be a prophet—not a fortune-teller, but a truth-teller—and in this age of profiteering online, how we can be more aware of when people are profiting by pretending to be a prophet. How we can avoid marketing drama triangles. And, the tools that are helping me, in this moment, to get fear out of my body.

For the (many) show notes, head over to my Substack.

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I’ve had a few conversations with spiritual teacher Thomas Hübl but I finally got to talk to him about the topic that’s been on my mind for a long time: evil. How do we define, and perceive what’s evil? What role does evil energy play in our own lives? What transgressions might we take responsibility for, and how? What moral conflict is part of our work, and what does not belong to us? What’s the purpose of it all? Where do we ultimately find and feel connection in the messiness of our lives?

For the show notes, more on Thomas Hübl, and links to all our previous conversations together, head over to my Substack.

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Loretta J. Ross’s particular approach to deciding when, and how, to call someone in helps us to avoid making other people’s problem our problem. It gives us a way to effectively be in conversation with people capable of causing harm—instead of trying, and failing, to be in defense of the vulnerable. Ross shares what she’s learned from watching people be manipulated into hating, and from helping them to release that hate. She talks about addressing our own cognitive dissonance; the guilt trip wires we carry internally; and learning to forgive ourselves for not knowing or caring enough. And after everything she’s seen and experienced, Ross tells us why she refuses to end her belief in the goodness of people—and she shares her joy with us.

For more on Loretta J. Ross and her new book Calling In: How to Start Making Change with Those You'd Rather Cancel—head over to my Substack.

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Psychotherapist Nicole Sachs has been pioneering a simple, yet remarkable approach to helping people with chronic pain, anxiety, and other very human conditions. Her story today begins with how she discovered Dr. John Sarno and eliminated her own debilitating back pain a few decades ago. Sachs explains why she’s come to believe that many chronic conditions stem from a dysregulation in the nervous system that leads the brain and the nervous system to send pain signals as a source of protection. As she puts it: “The pain is not in your head, but the solution is not in altering your physical body.” Today, she breaks down her (surgery-free) method, which involves something called journal speak to lower your emotional reservoir—which I think can be incredibly helpful and enlightening for any of us, whether or not you experience pain or anxiety.

For the show notes and more on Nicole Sachs—including her new book Mind Your Body—head over to my Substack. And just another reminder here that we are certainly not suggesting in this conversation (or anywhere in this podcast) that you don’t receive proper medical care or pursue a diagnosis for anything that is bothering you. Please always see your doctor and take care!

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There is a historical lack of research on the female body—and this has hurt women, men, everyone. But now, there is some fascinating research on the female body, which Cat Bohannon, PhD, shares today. (Bohannon is the New York Times–bestselling author of Eve: How the Female Body Drove 200 Million Years of Human Evolution.) For example, Bohannon explains why the fat around our butts and hips is quite special, and how women tend to metabolize painkillers differently than men. She breaks down the evolutionary origins of breast size and shape, and she debunks the myth that men are much larger than women. We talk about why women tend to heal better and live longer than men. And what’s really at stake for our health and lives when it comes to understanding sex differences.

For the show notes and more on Cat Bohannon, head over to my Substack.

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I recorded this month’s solo episode from the floor of the hotel room where I stayed for a couple of weeks after the fires broke out in Los Angeles. There, I met an incredible cast of characters and I started to process what’s happening in our city: Acts of bravery that have stunned me. The incredibly moving ways we have shown up for each other. Other very human responses that have created some dissonance. What I think will change in communities within and outside of LA. Wherever you live, how this all might feel different depending on whether you over or under function. (Toward the end, I also take a detour to answer questions I’ve gotten about my thoughts on what is unfolding in the news regarding Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni.)

For the show notes and related links, head over to my Substack.

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Why do we go along with situations that make us comfortable? What can we learn from nervous laughter, or a crocodile smile? If we’ve been conditioned to be overly compliant, how do we learn to be a little more defiant? How do we intuit when it’s the right time for us to comply, and when we’re better off defying? Sunita Sah—trained physician, Cornell University professor, organizational psychologist, and author of Defy—answers these questions and more. 

For the show notes and links to Sunita Sah’s work, head over to my Substack.

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In the past three decades, renowned author Pico Iyer has made more than 100 trips to a small monastery in California. Today, he shares what he’s learned there, along with other moments of beauty from his new book Aflame. He talks about why many of us crave a particular type of silence, how to escape the trappings of our minds, why a recollection can be more profound than a realization, and how he’s come to see the people in his life more clearly.

For more on Pico Iyer, his books, and this special Benedictine hermitage, head over to my Substack.

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