Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

Trying to bring the best sparkly version of yourself to your own healing: It just doesn't work, says Katherine May. In this conversation, we return to May’s New York Times–bestselling book Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times. It feels more relevant now than ever. We talk about finding a home for lingering, unexpressed grief and for vast, unsettled feelings. We talk about rest, creative work that we love, and things that make us laugh—and Katherine May always makes me laugh.

For the show notes, including links to May’s books and our previous podcast conversations together, head over to my Substack.

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Drawing from Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy, Gabby Bernstein created this simple, and yet powerful, process that you can do for one minute a day—or whenever you need to check in with yourself and reconnect with the core of who you are. It’s a helpful tool for (safely) recognizing beliefs, behaviors, and patterns that limit us—and then befriending these smaller, childlike parts of us, instead of letting them control us. It’s also what Bernstein calls “the real manifesting flex.”

For Bernstein’s new book Self-Help, more on IFS (including my podcast conversation with IFS founder Richard Schwartz), and the rest of the show notes: head over to my Substack.

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Astrologer Heidi Rose Robbins starts us off with an astrological snapshot of this moment in time (including a dip into Trump’s chart). Looking ahead into the new year, she breaks down the five major outer plans that are shifting into new signs—and what these changes mean for all of us. She explains why her friend, an astrological historian, is calling this “the era of plot twists.” On an individual level, Rose Robbins shares an invitation to give the gift of your rising sign now. And to end, she takes us through a mini debrief of every sign, and the reasons why each one can get a bad rap from time to time.

For the show notes and links, head over to my Substack.

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For December’s solo episode, I looked at the etymology of the word resolutions. What I found might surprise you. And instead of thinking about what I want to be or do next year, it got me thinking about what I want to let go of. And how I can recognize when I’m making things more complicated than they need to be (I love complexity and depth but can sometimes get carried away). I also get into a few other things that are on my mind right now, including: journal speaking, how we sometimes conflate altruism with transaction, the MAHA movement, and ways I can be softer on people while being harder on systems. Last, some news about two of my most fulfilling collaborations, which are both coming out in workbook form in 2025: True and False Magic (with Phil Stutz) and Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness (with Courtney Smith).

For the show notes, head over to my Substack.

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Gregory Boyle is a beloved Jesuit priest and the founder of Homeboy Industries, a gang-intervention, rehabilitation, and re-entry program in Los Angeles. He’s also a New York Times–bestselling author. His new book is called Cherished Belonging: The Healing Power of Love in Divided Times. (It may sound soft and saccharine—but it’s not.) Father Boyle explains why he so deeply believes two things: One, that everyone is unshakably good. And two, that everyone belongs to us. He talks about the difference between hope and optimism, and forgiveness and mercy. And why the moral quest has never kept us moral. It’s just kept us from each other. He also talks about what prohibits us from making progress, how to get underneath a complex issue, and his way of holding a container in which someone else can feel their wholeness.

For the show notes and to support Father Boyle’s work, head over to my Substack.

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John Price, PhD, is a depth psychotherapist, the host of the podcast The Sacred Speaks, and co-director and co-owner of The Center for the Healing Arts and Sciences in Houston. He shares his approach to spirituality, to bringing men into meaningful community, and to establishing intimacy. We talk about: Why it’s problematic that boys and men have largely defined themselves by what they’re not. Why he asks men about their inner lives as opposed to their feelings. And what it might look like if we had rites of passage that honored the masculine and the feminine within each of us, in truly unique ways.

For more show notes, head over to my Substack.

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Coach Courtney Smith joins us in this moment, when collective anxiety is running high, to share a perspective and tools that many of us could use right now. She explains why we understandably get seduced by fear and stuck operating below the line, from a place of threat. And how we can recognize when we’re ready to move above the line—and what awaits us there. She also shares some ways to escape the drama triangle, be okay with the unknown, and find power in your story—whether it’s one you’re fully committed to, or one you’re willing to expand.

For more show notes, head over to my Substack.

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Maria Rodale is the former CEO of Rodale, a longtime (and award-winning) advocate of organic regenerative farming, a lifelong learner, a self-described “crazy gardener,” and the author of Love Nature Magic, Shamanic Journeys into the Heart of My Garden (to name a few titles). She shares how she learned to journey shamanically (and what this does and does not mean)—and the incredible messages she’s received from nature, the world, and herself in the process.

See more about this episode and guest on my Substack.

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For November’s solo episode, listeners mostly asked me about the larger spiritual moment we might be part of at this moment in time—so I’m sharing some thoughts on that. Plus, what to do about male podcasters. Why it’s all too easy to mistake a transaction for altruism. How I’m trying to use my privilege to not morally exclude. And other things on my mind right now. (If there’s something you want me to explore in a future episode, drop a note in the podcast rating and review section.)

You can find the show notes, as always, on my Substack.

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“There's no generation before us that’s had this opportunity to find this treasure,” says therapist Connie Zweig, PhD. Zweig is the author of The Inner Work of Age: Shifting from Role to Soul. She outlines a compelling approach to aging—one that teaches us how to navigate identity shifts, see who we are beyond our roles, and truly make the most of the gifts of our lives. Today, she shares what happened when she did her own life review practice, and so many other gems that make me excited to keep getting older.

See the show notes and more about Zweig on my Substack.

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