Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

“We’re not empty containers just being filled up with fear and terror and trauma,” says psychotherapist Francis Weller. “We’re also medicine carriers.” Many of you will know Weller from his moving conversations about grief with Anderson Cooper, or his beautiful book The Wild of Edge of Sorrow. Weller’s new book, In the Absence of Ordinary, is exactly what we need now. Today, we talk about the wisdom and vitality that our grief can bring forth if we resist the impulse to go numb. Weller talks about what happens when we keep our grief company, when we allow it to keep moving, when we give ourselves what we’ve so been needing. He invites us, in this time of uncertainty, to move toward imagination, and what he calls the long dark—a space where we can connect with our own immensity, and collectively receive the medicine that is waiting there for all of us.

For the show notes (including links to the new edition of The Wild Edge of Sorrow and In the Absence of Ordinary, which was just released), head over to my Substack.

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“If we stop transforming, and we try to hold ourselves back, we’re effectively stagnating and killing the life that’s ahead,” says psychologist and author Sharon Blackie, PhD. Today, we talk about what Blackie has learned from studying myths and fairy tales, and working to reimagine the stories that currently define women’s lives. She shares a much-needed, wise, and beautiful perspective on the rebirth that can happen around menopause—when the layers that once defined us are peeled back, to reveal a deeper core, and a chance to transform once more.

For the show notes, head over to ⁠my Substack⁠.

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“We can’t change what’s happened, but we can change what it looks like inside of our mind-brain-body network,” says neuroscientist Caroline Leaf, PhD. Here, Leaf shares what she’s learned about how our minds work, and how we can change a thought, a habit, a pattern. And we get into the compelling 63-second intervention from her new book, Help in a Hurry: Simple Tips for Finding Peace When You're Overwhelmed, Anxious, or Stressed.     

For the show notes, head over to ⁠my Substack⁠.

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Thomas Hübl (a frequent guest here) is a renowned teacher whose work has focused on resilience and healing trauma. In this conversation, we explore: Some of our biggest fractured interpretations of the world, and how we can gain more clarity and connection. The impulse to become very certain about something very quickly, and our tendency to see other people in 2D—and the consequences of doing so. Using our own energy to temper, or shift, a larger energy that feels overwhelming. Different ways to approach conflict. Letting go of our commitment to having the most extreme reaction. And some of our judgments around wellness and self-care.

For the show notes, more on Thomas Hübl, and links to all our previous conversations together, head over to my Substack.

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In this month’s solo episode, I’m sharing some thoughts on why everyone seems to want a book under their belt, why that may or may not be the right move for you, as well as concrete tips and takeaways about what to think through before you begin putting words on paper. Most importantly, I share some tips and frameworks for getting you through the creative process once you begin.

For the show notes (and so many links if you want to go deeper), head over to my Substack.

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Today, I’m talking to Meggan Watterson—theologian and author of The Girl Who Baptized Herself—about the importance of being embodied, the search for self, where we derive power, and the way that culture is edited and passed down to us. Watterson tells the incredible stories behind the Gospel of Mary (and what happened to Mary Magdalene), and the Acts of Paul and Thecla (and what happened to Thecla). We also explore where my work meets hers, and the birth of the seven powers, which become the seven cardinal vices, or the seven deadly sins.

For the show notes, head over to my Substack.

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Rutger Bregman is the New York Times–bestselling author of Moral Ambition. Today, he shares his model for living a more meaningful life. It’s not about being an idealist, or following your “passions.” It is, in many ways, about effectively solving the problems in our lives using the talents we already have.

For Rutger Bregman’s work (including that amazing viral Davos clip, in case you missed it), head over to my Substack.

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“What matters is: Are you free?” asks Elizabeth Ralph. “Do you feel free?” Ralph is a former finance trader, and the founder of the Spiritual Investor, where she now helps people reach financial freedom in less traditional ways. Together, we explore some of my own (self-limiting) stories around money, and how our ego and identity gets wrapped up in our relationship to money. Ralph coaches us through moving toward a place of money neutrality, where it feels like money doesn’t have such a tight grip on us. And she explains why she believes the spiritual world “has to wake up to money.”

For links to Elizabeth Ralph’s programs and the show notes, head over to my Substack.

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“The midlife crisis is not a dark night of the soul,” says Chip Conley, founder of the Modern Elder Academy. “It’s a dark night of the ego.” Conley, who is also the author of Learning to Love Midlife, outlines the main myths that we’re led to believe about midlife—and some optimistic data about what actually happens during this chapter of our lives. He shares different frameworks for navigating the transitions that come in midlife. We talk about how in the early parts of our lives, we’re often naturally focused on constantly accumulating knowledge—and how it can be such a relief, and a gift, to be able to shift into distilling it all into wisdom.

For links to Chip Conley’s work and the show notes, head over to my Substack.

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In this month’s solo episode, I’m sharing: The tools and people helping me to manage my fear right now. Thoughts on growing up versus waking up. The most important things I’ve learned from the Spiral Dynamics theory of human development, and Ken Wilbur’s concept of holarchies. What makes me believe there is a way for many of us to expand our worldviews and push up the spiral now. And more.

For the show notes (and so many links if you want to go deeper), head over to my Substack.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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