Rebel Buddhist

Why are we so willing to work hard for someone else’s dream but not our own? Why are we so willing to disappoint ourselves instead of someone else?

The truth is—unless you’re some kind of crazy-evolved superhuman—you probably spend a good deal of time and mental energy obsessing about what other people think of you. You may not even realize you do this. Or, you may be hyper-aware of it and wish you could just STOP CARING, but don’t know where or how to start.

Either way, you’re not alone.

One of the most common reasons people come to me for coaching is to manage the anxiety + insecurity they have about caring so much about what other people think.

Some of my clients have panic attacks worrying about what their ex thinks of them, so they end up living stuck in the past instead of getting out and rocking their life without the ex.

Others don’t question their faith or ask the hard questions because people will see them as disloyal to their community, or they don’t want to leave their stable job to start their dream business because others will judge them for following their passion.

The lack of action they have comes from being afraid of what people might think of them – if they succeed OR if they fail. When you care too much about what someone thinks about you, it’s a no-win situation. You fail ahead of time.

Worrying about what other people think of us doesn’t just affect our mood or self-confidence; it actually affects our behavior in all kinds of crazy ways. It takes a HUGE toll on our ability to reach our fullest capacities, and oftentimes prevents us from doing what is in true alignment with who we are.

To change this – to really start living the life you were meant to live – you’re going to need to rebel against what people think is right for you, even if they have the best intentions or elements of what they’re saying is true. You’re going to need to be OK with people thinking you’re crazy, too full of pride, or irresponsible or too sexy or disrespectful or a total bitch. You’re going to need to be ok with them feeling threatened, embarrassed, jealous or holier-than-thou.

Because when people see you doing what’s risky and deciding to follow your dreams, do you know what it does?

It causes other people to question their own life and the way they’re showing up.

We need people to shake things up and make other people uncomfortable so that they wake the hell up.

We need rebels like YOU to lead the way in realizing that the point of life isn’t to be happy all the time. The points are:

To live this one precious life fully.

To feel ALL the feels.

To not fail ahead of time by not even trying, but to die at least knowing you gave it your all.

How what someone thinks about you really IS about them - and not you – so let people be wrong about you. Yes, you can (and should) come at it from a place of compassion. But start living in your own truth. And start doing it now.

• Why we seem to obsess over what other people think about us – how it holds us back
• How to let people be ‘wrong’ about you + learn to be OK with disappointing others
• How I learned to stop giving a flying hooha about other people's judgement – and how it freed me up to live the life of my dreams
• Why you MUST start doing you instead of what other people think is ‘right’, even when it’s hard and uncomfortable
• How you not caring what people think can inspire others

Having healthy boundaries is key when you practice letting people be wrong about you. Click here to grab the free Boundaries training.

Want to know how to build unshakable confidence and resilience? Have a tribe that supports you? Learn about the Rebel Buddhist Manifesto? Grab the Rebel Buddhist Training Kit for a free resilience training, an active online community, and more.

Ready to dive even deeper into all this? Check out Freedom School and see what everyone’s obsessed about. It’s not just group coaching. It’s a mindset revolution that you won’t want to miss.

We have this one, precious human life...at least in this body, on this miraculous planet, with these unique whacky people in our community around us.

Yet too many of us spend this amazing opportunity tolerating things that no longer serve us.

We tolerate our limiting mindsets, behaviors, and situations that no longer serve our highest good. We tolerate our negative self-talk, the soul-sucking job, the “good enough” relationship, the toxic friends, the lover that’s just not that into us. 

We tolerate our unhealthy habits like not exercising when we say we will, not meditating as often as we’d like, emotional eating, or overdrinking (which used to be my personal favorite) and over-Netflixing (my current favorite). 

And because how we do anything is how we do everything, we are more likely to tolerate the sexist comment made to our colleague by the boss, or the racist remark we overhear at the dinner party, or the crappy healthcare system. 

Why do we do this?

It’s actually really odd, because humans are not built to tolerate. On the contrary, we are built to be brave and to go out into the world and evolve and make a difference. We want to feel we are making the most of life and our potential. We crave a life of freedom, adventure, and purpose. We all have that Universal source within us - our Buddha nature  - and we want to realize it. In fact, it can be a big source of suffering when we don’t. 

While our nature is to want to evolve, there’s a problem we encounter while trying to  tap into our highest potential - and it’s called OUR BRAIN. Its primitive parts want to keep us safe so we survive. It wants us to stay very, very safe and not do anything to rock the boat. Which is quite handy...until it’s not.

Because not tolerating means taking risks and potentially feeling awkward. Or embarrassed. Or even humiliated or disliked. Evolution requires going into the unknown, being willing to adventure and not know what the outcome will be with any certainty.

To live a life of no regrets means choosing to rebel against the nature of our primitive brain, and tap into our highest self.

We need to rebel against our old mindsets and the stories that no longer serve us. 

We need to rebel against conventional thinking that says to be happy you have to change what’s on the outside.

We need to rebel against the notion that we are not powerful enough to make a difference.

We need YOU to stop tolerating, and to discover your power and live your truth.

Topics in this episode

• Why we tolerate things in our life that no longer serve us
• How your brain contributes to tolerating BS
• Why we make the same mistakes over and over - and why I know you are not broken
• How my cancer helped me stop tolerating - and how you should not wait for something like cancer to stop it yourself
• Discomfort and why we need to learn how to feel anything
• Tips for how to manage your mind so you STOP tolerating
• What is ziji and why you MUST have it

Resources:

Grab my free Unshakeable Confidence training at www.UnshakeableConfidenceCourse.com

How to Set Boundaries That Actually Work: 

https://www.anaverzone.com/how-to-set-boundaries-that-actually-work/