In marriage therapy, there are several ways of thinking that seem to destroy healthy communication in marriage. These thoughts fit into a category called cognitive distortions and they are faulty ways of viewing events that prevents partners from seeing things in a positive light.  

In today’s episode, Quinn teaches listeners: 

     1. Three of the common distortions she sees in marriage therapy
2. Why these ways of thinking contribute to communication going poorly
3. Steps to challenge your thinking in order to improve your communication 

Mind Renewal Tip:
If you want to know what your partner is thinking about a situation, ask them instead of assuming. It’s often what we “think” we know about a situation that makes it go poorly instead of the true facts surrounding it! 

Scripture Renewal Tip:
Ask and it shall be given to you. Seek and ye shall find. Knock and the door will be opened unto you. For everyone who asks receives, the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Matthew 7: 7-8 

Relationships often end up in negative cycles that repeat themselves and unless we understand how to stop it, we stay stuck in it. In today’s episode, Quinn discusses 5 steps to renew a negative relationship with a friend, spouse, child or coworker.

After listening, listeners will understand how to: 

     1. Identify it’s time to renew a relationship
2. The power of needs in changing a negative pattern
3. Do something different when negative things seem to repeat themselves 

Mind Renewal Tip:
We often repeat the same negative patterns of conflict with people we love and while it seems impossible to start new, simply seeing that person as one in whom Christ dwells can transform everything.  

Scripture Renewal Tip:
Do not conform to the patterns of this world but instead be transformed by the renewing of your mind so you can test and approve what God’s will is. His good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2 

Resources:
https://www.amazon.com/Good-Beautiful-God-Falling-Apprentice/dp/0830835318

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Everyone makes mistakes, but learning to forgive yourself for them is often easier than it sounds. It’s easy to focus on the power of forgiving others but forget how important it is to forgive ourselves in the process.
In the episode, Quinn discusses: 

     1. The power of understanding your emotions in self forgiveness
2. A sign in your relationships that reveals you need to forgive yourself
3. The power of mistakes in allowing us to grow
Mind Renewal Tip:
We often don’t want to make mistakes but fail to recognize that it is our mistakes that allow us a chance to grow and alert us that we need to.
Scripture Renewal Tip:
Ephesians Be kind to one another, tender-hearted forgiving each other, just as God also has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32
Resources:
https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-forgive-yourself-4583819
What are the 4 R's of self-forgiveness?

Responsibility: Accept what has happened and show yourself compassion.  

Remorse: Use guilt and remorse as a gateway to positive behavior change.  

Restoration: Make amends with whomever you're forgiving, even if it's yourself.  

Renewal: Learn from the experience and grow as a person 

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If you’re a parent you’ve likely had a time where someone has wronged your child and you feel an instinct to protect them in a way that is powerful and strong. But often that instinct can lead parents to rash decisions that make both our child and us look bad.  

In today’s episode, Quinn teaches listeners to:

     1. Identify the things that trigger them to act out as a mama or papa bear
2. The ultimate goal of parenting in these hard situations
3. The length of time to wait before responding 

Mind Renewal Tip:
Opportunities when we are triggered are the opportunities to show the world how someone with Christ responds to adversity.  

Scripture Renewal Tip:
But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22

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In this episode, Quinn examines several lies Christians believe when they are going through difficult times that make hard times harde3r than they need to be. People often things these lies comfort them when in actuality, they lead to stress,  

In the episode, Quinn teaches listeners:

     1. Why We Tell Ourselves These Lies
2. What to Tell Ourselves to replace them
3. Steps to Cope with Sadness in Difficulty  

Mind Renewal Tip:
We want to make sense of things that are non-sensical. We want to have the whole picture when we are only looking at half the drawing.  

Scripture Renewal Tip:
His asked Him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind? Jesus answered, “Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but it was so that the works of God might be displayed and illustrated in him.” John 9:1-5 

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In this week’s episode, Quinn shares about two honest conversations she has had with women lately that propelled her to analyze why honesty is so vital in close relationships. Quinn also addressed the myth that honesty can cause division instead of closeness.  

In the episode, Quinn teaches listeners:

     1. Feelings that might indicate its time for an honest conversations
2. Phrases that keep honest words safe and approachable
3. What honestly does to the person receiving it 

Mind Renewal Tip:
When you take the time to have an honest conversation with someone -- even when it involves hard words -- it builds far more trust and intimacy than holding back honesty can.  

Scripture Renewal Tip:
Seek peace and pursue it. Psalm 34:14 

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In the Bible, the word “ezer” is used to describe military and divine help 21 times in the Bible and all from positions of strength. God even describes himself as that word 16 different times, meaning that helping is a concept that has deep value in God’s eyes.   

In today’s episode, Quinn focuses on the power of being a help and strength to those in our lives. Specifically, she focuses on: 

     1. Teaching a mindset that changes our perspective on helping
2. How being a helper transforms our attitude in hardship
3. Scripture that focuses on God as our helper 

Mind Renewal Tip:
When we stop telling someone how to change and start helping them create the changes we think are necessary, our relationships improve.  

Scripture Renewal Tip:

I I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth.
Psalm 121:2 

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In today’s episode, Quinn addresses reasons why you might be struggling with chronic anger. She explains levels of anger and teaches the ways in which we want to address our emotional needs instead of suppressing them so that we don’t explode.  

In the episode, Quinn explains to listeners:

     1. The four stages of anger including irritation, frustration, rage and fury
2. The power of saying no to the unnecessary when dealing with chronic anger.
3. The benefit of finding a calming phrase in the middle of an anger surge.

Mind Renewal Tip:
Anger isn’t the problem. What’s causing your anger is. 

Scriptural Renewal Tip:
Wise people are careful and stay out of trouble, but fools are careless and quick to act. Someone with a quick temper does foolish things, but someone with understanding remains calm. Proverbs 14: 16-17

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Almost everyone you meet walks through a hard season at one point or another. However, we often feel at a loss as to the right way to show care and concern for someone that is struggling. 

In today’s episode, Quinn walks listeners through common lies that keep us from feeling like we are equipped to comfort others well. She not only identifies then but also teaches listeners how to:

     1. Meet these lies with truth that allows them to act on their care and concern.
2. Simple ways to show care through a text.
3. Her favorite tip with offering meals for someone in a hard time. 

Mind Renewal Tip:
There is never a bad moment to show someone you care about their hurting heart or pain. 

Scripture Renewal Tip:
Carry each other’s burdens and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 
Galatians 6:2

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We want our children to have passion and purpose through their involvement in activities and sports. But often it’s hard to know when it’s healthy to say no to commitments in order to slow down and enjoy life and parenthood.   

In today’s episode, Quinn offers listeners:

1. Stats on what is realistic about our children’s future in sports
2. What identify we want them anchored to
3. A question every person should be asking themselves.  

Mind Renewal Tip:
If we don’t know why are children are doing an activity, we should feel permission to say no to it.  

Scripture Renewal Tip:
Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10 

Resources:
https://ilovetowatchyouplay.com/2021/05/17/sorry-your-kid-isnt-going-pro/

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