Nope! We're Not Monogamous

Rewriting Your Relationship Code: Ditching the Defaults for Real Freedom, Ep. 130


Listen Later

Are you stuck running relationship patterns you never consciously chose? In this episode of Nope! We’re Not Monogamous, I’m breaking down how to identify the default “rules” you inherited about love, sex, and partnership, and how to rewrite them so your relationships actually work for YOU.

So many of us grew up believing myths like:

  • “If you’re really in love, you won’t be attracted to anyone else.”
  • “To be a good partner, you have to want everything your partner wants.”
  • “Jealousy means love.”

The problem? These defaults often create shame, confusion, and conflict in non-monogamous and polyamorous relationships.

In this episode, you’ll learn the 5 steps to rewriting your relationship code so you can experience real freedom:

  1. Identify the beliefs you inherited.
  2. Question what’s actually true for YOU.
  3. Create new agreements with intention.
  4. Practice new habits until they stick.
  5. Celebrate every time you choose yourself.

By the end, you’ll see how rewriting your defaults allows you to show up with more confidence, clarity, and joy in every connection.

What you’ll take away from this episode:

  • Why inherited relationship beliefs hold us back in non-monogamy.
  • The surprising truths about love, attraction, and jealousy.
  • Practical tools to create new agreements with your partners.
  • How gratitude and celebration make new patterns stick.
  • Why freedom is a daily practice, not a one-time decision.

Send us a text

Support the show

📰 Subscribe to Not A Monogamous Newsletter to stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia. https://elleciapaine.podia.com/newsletter

❤️ Enjoying the show?
The best way to thank us is by following and leaving a review or a note. And if you want more, join our Patreon! http://www.patreon.com/notmonogamous

👀 Find Us Online
🌍 Website: https://www.elleciapaine.com
📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elleciapaine
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elleciapaine/

Music: Composer/Author (CA): Oscar Lindstein
STIM IPI: 572 393 237

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

Nope! We're Not MonogamousBy Ellecia Paine

  • 4.8
  • 4.8
  • 4.8
  • 4.8
  • 4.8

4.8

43 ratings


More shows like Nope! We're Not Monogamous

View all
Sex With Emily by Dr. Emily Morse

Sex With Emily

6,731 Listeners

We Gotta Thing - A Swinger Podcast by Mr & Mrs Jones's Swinging Adventures

We Gotta Thing - A Swinger Podcast

784 Listeners

Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships by Multiamory | Pleasure Podcasts

Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

914 Listeners

ReWilding with Sabrina Lynn by Sabrina Lynn

ReWilding with Sabrina Lynn

337 Listeners

Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel by Esther Perel Global Media

Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

14,914 Listeners

Come Curious by Florence Bark & Reed | QCODE

Come Curious

390 Listeners

Sex and Psychology Podcast by Dr. Justin Lehmiller

Sex and Psychology Podcast

293 Listeners

Financial Feminist by Her First $100K

Financial Feminist

6,406 Listeners

LOVERS by shan by LOVERS by shan

LOVERS by shan

5,404 Listeners

Reimagining Love with Dr. Alexandra Solomon by Dr. Alexandra Solomon

Reimagining Love with Dr. Alexandra Solomon

296 Listeners

On Attachment by Stephanie Rigg

On Attachment

1,047 Listeners

Girls Gone Deep by Elle and Vee

Girls Gone Deep

259 Listeners

THE MONOGAMISH MARRIAGE by Kate & Liam

THE MONOGAMISH MARRIAGE

178 Listeners

Vanilla Swingers - A Swinger Podcast for Newbies, by Newbies in the Lifestyle by Kat & Leo

Vanilla Swingers - A Swinger Podcast for Newbies, by Newbies in the Lifestyle

366 Listeners

Pineapple Pinup: Hotwife Swingers Life by Tasty Tress

Pineapple Pinup: Hotwife Swingers Life

140 Listeners