“We depoliticize distress by locating it in the individual.” — Naomi Fisher
Naomi Fisher helped me become a better mother without ever even meeting me. I stumbled across her work when one of my children was dealing with school anxiety. Doing so empowered me to take my child’s distress seriously and trust my instincts as a mother.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Fisher and I discuss the myriad harms of authoritarian parenting practices, that focus on compliance above all else. Dr. Fisher’s work focuses heavily on school anxiety and refusal. Some of the topics we discuss in this episode include:
The weaponization of mom-guilt and mom-shaming to gain compliance from mothers and children.
Why we spend so much time teaching parents not to trust their children’s emotions.
Alternatives to forced compliance, and what to do when a child doesn’t feel like they can go to school.
Why catastrophization plays such a significant role in parenting.
Antidotes to rigid thinking, and what to do when plan A (or B, or C) doesn’t work.
Why the relationship with the child must always come first.
Trusting children to know their needs, and helping them to advocate for those needs.
I absolutely love listening to Dr. Fisher, and I listen to this recording every time I need a pep talk to get through the hard times with my own kids. I hope it will have the same effect on you.
About Dr. Naomi Fisher
Naomi Fisher is an independent clinical psychologist. She specializes in trauma, autism and alternative ways to learn.
She has a doctorate in clinical psychology from Kings College London (Maudsley), a PhD in developmental cognitive psychology also from Kings College (IoPPN), and a degree in Experimental Psychology from the University of Cambridge. She is the author of four books: Changing Our Minds, The Teenager’s Guide to Burnout, A Different Way to Learn, and When the Naughty Step Makes Things Worse.
I urge everyone to visit her incredible Substack, where you will find so much wisdom.
You can also check out her website here.
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