In this episode of the Parent Companion for Play Therapy series, I talk about how we interpret our children's behavior — and why it's so important to see behavior as communication. I share a simple but powerful reminder from the phrase that comes from Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (Landreth, Bratton, 2016) "focus on the doughnut, not the hole." When we fixate on what's missing or what frustrates us about our kids, we lose sight of the good that's right in front of us.

I explain how behavior is often a child's way of showing pain, confusion, or vulnerability, and how shifting our perspective changes everything about how we respond. I also discuss the idea of the self-fulfilling prophecy — that children often become what adults expect of them. When we see them as capable and good, they rise to meet that belief. This episode helps parents understand what it truly means to focus on the whole child, to see behavior differently, and to strengthen the relationship that drives growth and change.

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Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.