Times of grieving can be so difficult to face and unpredictable in how they present. A question that's also been on our minds for a while is 'have you ever felt the expectation to finish grieving once the funeral is over?'

On this episode of Sunday Sanctuary, we look into the rituals and rites of passage that can be held to mark the passing of a loved one. What we hope is that you will see how much freedom there is to decide what you do to remember those you have lost, all in your own time.

Join Petra as she talks to her friend (and boss) Phil Guyan, who beautifully shares all the ways in which he remembered, and continues to remember his dad, Neil. Producer Sam drops past Auckland's Threshold Choir, the Cadence Singers, to learn about their work. Lastly, Petra speaks with former hospital chaplain Heike Pomare, from Ōtepoti/Dunedin, about the role of being a 'grief holder'.

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Awe

The awe piece in this episode was written by Sam who took inspiration from the video by Listening In, titled The Music that links Dumbledore's death to Bach and Radiohead. Watch it here.

Sacred texts

• Grey Areas with Petra Bagust, Season 1 Episode 9: Inevitable Grief
• Excerpt from My Inner Sky by Mari Andrew (pg. 144-146)
• The Crab/Waterbaby by Tiny Ruins