Sex Upgraded

This is the story of how I had my first amazing threesome. (I had many bad ones before this). In this episode you’ll learn how to have a threesome, how to avoid bad threesomes, how to talk about threesomes, AND you’ll get an awesome technique to actually begin a threesome too.

YOU CAN HAVE AN AMAZING THREESOME TOO!

You might think that because I’m a sex coach, I’ve had the most amazing sex life for many years. A sex life full of all kinds of threesomes, while getting all of my fantasies met. Not true. Remember that people often go into a profession that they desperately needed to improve in themselves. That was me. I used to be a sexual mess. (I’ve done a lot of work since then).

In this episode you’ll hear a mix of personal story with practical action steps you can take if you want to have a threesome too. One of those important steps is communication. You have to talk about it. Use this framework: The Better Sex Conversation. (FYI There are images on that page that are not safe for work. In fact, I don’t recommend looking at any of my content on any work-related device).

If this episode is helpful for you, please share it with a friend!

Thank you.

-Taylor

EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:

01:50 Are there bad threesomes?

04:02 Threesomes are a very common fantasy

07:09 Is it toxic for men to want a threesome with two women?

08:55 Threesome VS Play Party (Sex Party)

11:09 How I initiated this threesome

15:25 Should you drink alcohol to take the edge off?

16:30 The helpful conversation framework (how to avoid landmines)

23:50 Why it’s important to have this conversation

26:24 How to begin a threesome (we played rotational dom)

33:57 What’s the first step to having a threesome?

CONNECT WITH TAYLOR:

• FREE 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge
• FREE Ejaculation Control Guide
• The Orgasmic Mastery Course
• Taylor’s Instagram
• Taylor’s Youtube Channel
• Taylor’s Website

CONNECT WITH JON HANDELMAN:

• Jon’s Website

Support the show

In this episode we’ll explore how to start, structure and maintain a successful men’s group (even if you’ve never been in one before). I’ve personally been in men’s groups for over 10 years, and they’ve improved literally every area of my life.

In addition to learning how to start a group of your own, you'll also hear personal stories from my experiences in men's groups, and you'll hear from a good friend of mine named Nathan who’s actually in my personal men’s group too. Nathan just started a second men's group, and his story is helpful and inspiring because it shows just how easy it can be to start one.

This episode is a recording of the “How to Start a Men’s Group” workshop I led a month ago over Zoom. The recording turned out so well I decided to turn it into a full podcast episode. There's a lot in this episode, so if you're someone who likes to see things written out in nicely structured ways, check out the guide I created below:

GUIDE: HOW TO START A MEN’S GROUP
To get the structured outline of what we talked about in this episode, you can visit my website here: Guide to Starting a Men's Group

Thank you friend! I hope this episode deeply serves your life.

-Taylor


EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:
08:30 Why just having male friends is not enough
11:01 Problematic views of masculinity & men’s groups
18:15 Story: the first time Taylor went to a men’s group
26:00 How to start & structure a men’s group
29:19 The structure of Taylors men’s group
34:58 Taylor welcomes guest: Nathan Morrison
41:49 Nathan seeing a man cry in a men’s group
46:41 How men’s groups can help your romantic relationship
52:51 Without men’s groups, what problems arise?
55:00 The power of physical contact with men
1:01:41 Emotions don’t need to be “fixed”
1:07:28 Q&A


CONNECT WITH TAYLOR

• Taylor’s Website
• Taylor’s Instagram
• Taylor’s Youtube Channel
• The Orgasmic Mastery Course
• How to Start a Men’s Group (Episode Outline & Guide)

Support the show

Have you ever thought someone was hot, and then realized there was zero chemistry between you? In this episode we’ll explore the difference between sexual attraction and energetic attraction, how to notice energetic attraction, and why it’s important to pay attention to it. Energetic attraction can be your “radar” that you can use to improve all areas of your life, including business, family, romantic, etc…

🔴 🎥 - You can also watch this episode on Youtube.

There is a huge difference between sexual attraction and energetic attraction, and it's important to understand this difference. In this personal story episode, you’ll hear about the time I went to a sexual energy dance workshop in Thailand, and how I learned this difference in a first-hand, surprising way. (I was most attracted to a woman who could have been my grandmother, and ended up having a super erotic dance with her. It was a trip… and a HUGE learning experience for me about the difference between energetic attraction and sexual attraction.

EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:
02:37 – Sexual Attraction without Energetic Attraction?
03:10 – Living on Koh Phangan, Thailand
06:07 – The sexual energy dance workshop
11:07 – Noticing where your energetic body goes
12:40 – Energetic attraction & sexy dance with an elderly woman
17:39 – Energetic attraction & dance with another man
21:25 – How to begin exploring energetic attraction
23:55 – How to explore energetic sex with your partner(s).

The workshop I talked about in this episode was led by Lion Galban, and after you listen, I recommend checking out the previous episode where I interviewed Lion about: How to Unlock Your Wild, Primal, Sexual Self

To check out the full episode show notes, click here: Sexual Attraction vs Energetic Attraction

Connect with Taylor:

• Taylor’s Website
• Taylor’s Instagram
• Taylor’s Youtube Channel
• The Orgasmic Mastery Course
• FREE 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge
• FREE Ejaculation Control Guide

Support the show

In this episode, Lion and I explore how to be fully embodied, and why this is THE key to unlocking your wild, primal, sexual self. Unlocking this part of yourself allows you to create the kinds of relationships and sexual experiences you truly desire, in a safe way that builds connection and trust. You can’t just think your way into sexual and relationship success though, and this is where most people get stuck. You have to practice embodying it, and understand what that actually means.

IN THIS EPISODE…

• What does embodiment actually mean?
• How and why embodiment is the key to unlocking your wild, primal, sexual self
• How to open your heart, and why you need to feel your emotions fully
• Why learning have non-ejaculatory orgasms can save your relationship

INTRODUCING LION GALBAN

I met Lion Galban in Thailand a few years ago, and was immediately inspired and triggered by him at the same time. The way he moved on the dance floor with multiple women blew my mind, and I realized that I was actually jealous of the freedom he appeared to have. On that dance floor, he was embodied in a way that I’ve RARELY seen in any other man.

Without putting him on a pedestal, I decided I wanted to learn about this aspect of being alive from him… So I went to one of his embodiment/dance workshops back when we were both living in Thailand. It was kind of like a dance-oriented play party. And if you’ve never heard of the term play party before, it usually refers to a kind of gathering where different people can explore being sensual and sexual with each other, within the context of a certain set of agreements to make the space as safe as possible. (If you want me to make a podcast episode about play parties, let me know).

If you look at Lion’s Instagram, you’ll see lots of videos of him moving in wild ways, and you might even see some things that trigger you. It’s worth looking at - pun intended. If you have any questions about today’s episode, please feel free to reach out to Lion and/or myself. We’re both here in service of your life.

EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS

7:00 – My first impression of Lion (when I got triggered)

13:57 – What does embodiment mean?

26:09 – Energetic attraction vs sexual attraction

30:57 – What does “allow her to feel your heart” mean?

37:40 – How to work with your emotions in an intelligent way

40:49 – Why feeling your feelings can improve your entire life

43:57 – How to honor and be your unique, primal, sexual self

46:30 – How to navigate sexual shame around desires

54:53 – Why learning to have an orgasm without ejaculation can save a relationship

CONNECT WITH LION

• Lion’s Website
• Lion’s Instagram
• Lion’s Facebook Page

CONNECT WITH TAYLOR

• Taylor’s Website
• Taylor’s Instagram
• Taylor’s Youtube Channel
• The Orgasmic Mastery Course

Support the show

This episode will give you an in-depth understanding of what causes premature ejaculation, plus how to fix it. We'll explore: 

• The most common causes of premature ejaculation
• How to cure premature ejaculation naturally
• Evolutionary reasons most men struggle with premature ejaculation
• How porn, stress, fear of intimacy, shallow breathing and more can all contribute to premature ejaculation
• How to last longer in bed (with concrete strategies)

--- TIMES & TOPICS ---
3:33: Quick Overview: 13 Causes of Premature Ejaculation
12:48: In-Depth: Evolutionary Advantages of Premature Ejaculation
16:34: 13 Causes of Premature Ejaculation
16:51: 1 - Poor Masturbation Habits
18:52: 2 - Porn and Premature Ejaculation
21:56: 3 - Too Much Focus on Ejaculation
25:36: 4 - Hyperfocus on Sensations in Your Penis
26:19: 5 - Too Many Kegels Can Cause Premature Ejaculation
30:43: 6 - Too Much Tension in Your Body
32:54: 7 - Too Much Stress in Your Life
34:51: 8 - Performance Anxiety
37:44: 9 - You're Not Breathing Deeply Enough
40:54: 10 - You're Thrusting Too Quickly
43:24: 11 - You Need to Develop Mental Resolve
46:32: 12 - You Have a Fear of Deep Intimacy
53:48: 13 - You're In the Wrong Relationship
57:11: Free Ejaculation Control Guide
57:40: The Orgasmic Mastery Course


HOW TO OVERCOME PREMATURE EJACULATION
I’ve helped thousands of men go from only lasting 30 seconds to well over 20 minutes, and you can do it too. Check out my Free Ejaculation Control Guide, or go through a comprehensive journey to completely reprogram and upgrade your sexual response system: The Orgasmic Mastery Course.

For the record, I used to massively struggle with premature ejaculation, to the point where I would even avoid women I was attracted to because I was afraid of one day having sex with them and cumming too soon. (Because that’s what happened). I was that guy - I used to ejaculate in 30 seconds on the regular, and it destroyed my confidence and identity as a man. I get it.

Today, on the other side of this journey, it's my mission to help you. I'm happy to say that it's 100% possible for you to overcome premature ejaculation and have the sex life you want.


WE ALL HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO BE EPIC LOVERS
That means YOU. Underneath the conditioning of society, underneath the impact of porn and masturbation habits, underneath whatever you have experienced that’s holding you back, is the magnificent, epic lover that you are. There's an incredible, mind-expanding, heart-opening and multi-orgasmic world of lovemaking that's available to you. Here's a personal story from my life of what's possible: The First Time I had a Tantric Orgasm


IT'S A JOURNEY - HAVE COMPASSION FOR YOURSELF
If you’ve experienced premature ejaculation, you’re not alone. It can feel frustrating, sad, annoying, confidence-destroying and hopeless... but remember, it is 100% possible for you to overcome premature ejaculation and have the sex life you want! I'm here to help you.


LINKS:

• Orgasmic Mastery Course
• FREE Ejaculation Control Guide
• FREE 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge
• Taylor’s Instagram
• What Causes Premature Ejaculation (Full Show Notes)

Support the show

In this episode we'll explore:

• What is grief?
• How does grief affect relationships and our sex lives?
• What happens if we don’t integrate our grief?
• How to grieve in a healthy way, and why doing this can be beautiful
• What is a grief ceremony, and where can you find one?

TOPICS & TIMES:

• 3:44 - What is grief?
• 9:08 - What happens if you don't deal with grief?
• 15:39 - How does grief affect relationships and sex?
• 28:13 - How can you tell if you have unresolved grief?
• 32:07 - Unresolved grief lives in your body, not the mind.
• 35:05 - What is a grief ceremony? (And how do you grieve in a healthy way).
• 44:00 - Grief in community.
• 47:00 - I cried during Spiderman. (And how crying gives you strength).
• 51:21 - Techniques to work with grief.
• 59:07 - How to deal with a breakup.

Grief can be tricky to notice because we don’t talk about it much as a society.... For the most part, we don’t even acknowledge it exists. Grief is different from the sadness you might experience when watching a movie, and you can even have unresolved grief and not know it...

Unresolved grief can impact your romantic and sexual relationships, your family relationships, your work life, and how you feel as you go through your day… which in turn has a subtle impact on every single decision you make. It’s a big deal… And this is part of the reason Josh Fox devotes a substantial amount of his health care practice to helping people work through their grief. 


RESOLVING YOUR GRIEF MAKES LIFE (AND SEX) AMAZING!

How do you resolve your grief? Actually allowing yourself to FEEL emotions can be a good place to begin. This can be tricky though, because almost every message we've gotten from society says to NOT feel your feelings. It’s so important to actually allow your feelings to move, so they don’t get stuck in your body. (Techniques in the episode).

WHAT IS A GRIEF CEREMONY? 

In this episode, Fox describes the grief ceremonies he facilitates as day-long events that start with authentic connection exercises and embodiment practices to get you really present and in your body. Then the grief ceremony moves into a more emotive phase where the process of grieving (actually crying, yelling and screaming) can happen in community. There is an ancestor/grief altar where you can place images of any deceased loved ones, and you’re invited to visit this altar throughout the ritual whenever you feel called.

Grieving in community is an important part of this ceremony, because it normalizes the process of grief, and it provides support for everyone to see and actually feel in their bodies that they are not alone. Grief is a shared experience with all other humans, and on the other side of grieving is great release and the potential for more joy and pleasure than you’ve possibly imagined.

RESOURCES MENTIONED: 

• “The Wild Edge of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief” - by Francis Weller
• “Atlas of the Heart” by Brené Brown

CONNECT WITH FOX:

• Fox’s Website

TAYLOR'S LINKS:

• Orgasmic Mastery Course 
• Free 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge 
• Free Ejaculation Control Guide 
• Taylor’s Instagram
• Taylor’s Youtube Channel 

Support the show

IN THIS EPISODE…

• The story of my first “Tantric Orgasm” (extended non-ejaculatory orgasm)
• Tools and techniques to help you have these experiences
• How non-ejaculatory orgasms can be psychedelic
• The importance of emotional vulnerability in unlocking men’s abilities to experience non-ejaculatory orgasms
• How ejaculatory orgasms can actually be less pleasurable than a full-body, extended non-ejaculatory orgasm

WHAT IS A TANTRIC ORGASM?
There is no universally agreed-upon meaning for this term, but in the context of this story, I’m referring to a certain kind of orgasm where orgasmic pleasure is felt throughout the entire body (not just localized in the penis and genitals), and this orgasm can be experienced for many minutes at a time - without any ejaculation of semen or refractory period. Tantric Orgasms are non-ejaculatory orgasms, but non-ejaculatory orgasms are not necessarily “Tantric.”

What’s the difference then?  “Tantric” in this context refers to what is happening in your internal state, feelings of connection (with self, lover and all), and awareness (of self, lover and all) while you are experiencing this orgasm. In contrast to just experiencing non-ejaculatory orgasmic pleasure in your entire body, a “Tantric” orgasm occurs when the extended non-ejaculatory orgasm is accompanied with experiences of altered/heightened states of consciousness where you might feel more expansive and connected to things than you normally would.

It can actually feel psychedelic, and in this episode I talk about how this experience actually did become psychedelic for me (and for context, my partner and I were totally sober). I went to the bathroom to pee after making love for a long time and experiencing an extended non-ejaculatory orgasm, and when I got into the bathroom, the walls moved and sparked as if I was on psychedelics!

HOW TO HAVE A TANTRIC ORGASM
In this episode I’ll share some surprising tips and insights that will help you get there. Think about this for contrast: the ejaculatory orgasms we’re familiar with are relatively simple to force, but extended, full body non-ejaculatory orgasms can’t be forced. You can’t “stroke harder” to get there. It’s an allowing process… It’s an unfolding process… like ocean waves of orgasmic pleasure rolling and crashing through your body, over and over and over again.

NON-EJACULATORY ORGASM TRAINING
If you want to experience this kind of sex - having sex for hours and getting into the incredible realms of non-ejaculatory orgasmic bliss, check out my Orgasmic Mastery Course. It’s an in-depth training that will guide you through a clearly outlined, step-by-step journey to help you experience this kind of sexual magic and upgrade your intimate life forever. 

If you’d like to start with simply overcoming premature ejaculation, check out my free ejaculation control guide. It’ll start you off in a good direction. One of the next podcast episodes will help you in this department too - it’ll be about 13 common causes of premature ejaculation. Stay tuned!

EPISODE RESOURCES

• Orgasmic Mastery Course
• Free 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge
• Free Ejaculation Control Guide  
• Taylor’s Instagram 
• Taylor’s Youtube Channel

Support the show

This podcast will explore everything from non-ejaculatory orgasms and semen retention to threesomes, anal sex, breath work, energetic sex, play parties, sexual energy transmutation and more. You can sign up here to be notified when new episodes come out. 

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THERE WILL BE THREE KINDS OF EPISODES:

1. Interviews with guest sex experts from around the world
2. "How-To" Episodes like "What Causes Premature Ejaculation" and "Intro to Semen Retention"
3. Personal Stories from my journey exploring sex around the world, like the time I went to an anal sex party in Asheville, to the time I had my first Tantric orgasm, and then the time I had my first amazing threesome.

You can search through these episodes by category on my podcast website.

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WHAT IS "EROS RISING"?

Eros - refers to sexual attraction, sexual desire, sexual love, etc. Eros is also the name of the ancient Greek god of Love, who is the son of Aphrodite.

Rising - literally means rising, to raise up, and figuratively it means to improve and make better.

Eros Rising:

1. Raising sex (and shame, anxieties and negative beliefs around sex) up from under the rug that society has swept it under, into the world of awareness, integrity and shame-free pleasure.
2. The process men need to go through in order to experience non-ejaculatory orgasms and full-body pleasure. We need to literally raise our sexual pleasure up from our genitals into the rest of our body - into our bellies, hearts, and the entire rest of our bodies. 

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THE FIRST SEASON WILL BE 12 EPISODES
They're already planned out, and they're going to be awesome. When the first 12 episodes are complete, I (Taylor) will evaluate how things have gone, and consider what direction to go in for the future of this podcast.

If you like this podcast and want it to continue, please leave a thoughtful review wherever you're listening. It really helps, and it'll let me know you care.

Thank you friend!

-Taylor


RESOURCES & LINKS:

• The Orgasmic Mastery Course (Be the best lover you can be).
• FREE 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge
• FREE Ejaculation Control Guide
• Taylor's Youtube Channel
• Taylor's Instagram

MUSIC CREDIT:
Song: "Pink Dolphins" (Numatic Remix)
Written by: Tony Moss/Sunny Solwind/Shireen Jarrahian/David Brown
Remixed by: Numatic

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