For many of us men, entering middle life can feel unsettling if not downright upsetting. We talk about being more than halfway through life, on the back nine, or some other less-than-tantalizing description of this stage of life.

But it doesn't have to be that way. In fact, it can be the beginning of the richest part of life. We know more than we used to. And we can apply that knowledge to live more fully than we ever have.

I was recently a guest on the Midlife Male podcast with Greg Scheinman (https://midlifemale.com/). I loved our conversation, subsequently read his book (also called Midlife Male) and found it engaging and full of insights. So, I decided to have him as a guest on this podcast for you, dear listener. As you will hear, Greg is a man rich with vitality and one who has given a lot of thought to this stage of life. I am impressed with how fully he lives while simultaneously how selectively he lives. That is, there are so many things that he could do that he does not do because they are not consistent with his focus.

I like that!

So, listen in as Greg and I talk about living more fully in midlife.

Flirting. Could it be an important skill for us to cultivate? My guest says YES—no matter our station in life.

And when you hear his definition, you’ll learn that it’s not just about sex, dating, or romance. It can be done in friendly contexts and can cultivate friendships as well.

Benjamin Camras (https://www.instagram.com/benjamincamras/?hl=en) is a flirt coach, and he unpacks what flirting is, why it’s important, and how to do it! Of course, many of his clients are people who are looking for love but, as you’ll hear, it’s not a skill solely reserved for them alone.

So, listen in as Benjamin and I talk about flirting and how you might be able to improve your abilities to do it!

You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts, and find out more about working together 1:1 here.

Status. It’s something we want but might have difficulty admitting its presence or acknowledging we want it.

Except it’s pretty much always around us and, according to my guest, it’s a fundamental human need. It can drive the levels to which we receive respect and how we think about ourselves.

Dr. Alison Fragale (https://alisonfragale.com/) is a professor at the University of North Carolina, a keynote speaker, and the author of a book I loved called Likeable Badass: How Women Get the Success They Deserve. I’m not alone in my love for this book. Wharton professor and author Adam Grant said the book is “The ultimate guide for women to achieve their goals.”

So, listen in as Alison and I talk about status, how it relates to women, and how it can inform us all.

https://alisonfragale.com/

https://alisonfragale.substack.com/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/alisonfragale/

https://www.instagram.com/alisonfragale/

Many of the best innovators in art, science, human rights, and other important areas of life have had one thing in common: they were rebels.

In some way, they refused to subordinate themselves by merely doing what was expected of them. Instead, they changed the way things were done… for the better. I’m not talking about reckless insubordination—the kind a character like Joker from Batman engages in. Instead, I’m referring to the principled version, the kind that Gandhi or MLK have exhibited in which people followed their hearts, their moral compasses, and the world would become a better place for it.

Dr. Todd Kashdan (https://toddkashdan.com/) is a professor at George Mason University and a leading authority on well-being, curiosity, courage, and resilience. He has published more than 220 scientific articles, his work has been cited more than 46,000 times, and he received the American Psychological Association's Award for Distinguished Scientific Early Career Contributions to Psychology. He’s also the author of a book I loved that is the subject of this interview called The Art of Insubordination: How to Dissent and Defy Effectively. I am not alone as the book has been praised by multiple thought leaders like Robert Cialdini, Seth Godin, and Susan David.

So, listen in as Todd and I talk about principled insubordination.

Linkedin: @toddkashdan - https://www.linkedin.com/in/toddkashdanInstagram: @toddkashdanThreads: @toddkashdanTwitter: @toddkashdanFacebook: @ToddKashdan https://www.facebook.com/public/Todd-Kashdan

None of us goes through life unwounded. Physically, we may stub a toe. We may fall and get hurt. Or break a bone.

And then there are the psychological wounds—particularly those that come from people who matter to us. We may be hurt by our parents, teachers, friends, or romantic partners.

When we attend to our wounds, they may actually provide unexpected gifts or strengths. But when we don’t, they can fester, and we can inadvertently cause others harm or pain.

Dr. Michael Meade (https://www.mosaicvoices.org/) is a mythologist, professor, author, podcaster, storyteller, and, personally, one of my all-time favorite thinkers. This is his second visit to my podcast, and I think you, my listener, will take away many gems from this conversation.

So, listen in as Michael and I talk about how our wounds form us and what we can do to both heal and to help bring these unexpected gifts to ourselves and to others.

Living Myth Podcast with Michael Meade: https://www.mosaicvoices.org/podcast

When I think of my favorite couple therapy experts, Dr. Stan Tatkin (https://www.thepactinstitute.com/therapy-with-stan) is one of the first names that comes to mind. I’ve read several of his books. I’ve attended several of his trainings. And this will be the third time I’m hosting him on SuperPsyched.

Stan’s work has changed my life and has been instrumental to the field of psychotherapy. And his expertise spans various areas of how we love including the neurobiology of love and relationships. As you might imagine, there’s a lot of terrain to cover! So, on this episode, I thought we’d talk about love hacks and a bit about attachment styles. Whether or not you’re not familiar with attachment styles, I’m confident you’ll come to have a better understanding of them and that this episode will delight you and be very useful.So, without further do, a hearty welcome back to one of my all-time faves!

Experiencing panic really sucks. It can occur without warning even when there’s no actual threat in sight. Physical and psychological symptoms run the gamut: racing heart, shortness of breath, sweating, nausea, thoughts of losing control…

… and even fear of dying.I had a panic attack of my own years ago and thought I was having a heart attack. Fortunately, cardiological causes were ruled out. It was panic. And, yeah, while I was relieved, it left me feeling vulnerable to having another. 

Why does panic happen? And what can we do about it?

Fortunately, I know just the guy to give us the info we need. Dr. Charles Schaeffer (https://www.drchuckschaeffr.com/) is a clinical psychologist in private practice in New York, an adjunct professor at NYU, and among his many other accomplishments, he’s the author of a book I loved called When Panic Happens: Short-Circuit Anxiety and Fear in the Moment Using Neuroscience and Polyvagal Theory. I’m not alone in my admiration of Chuck and his book; several thought leaders have shared their praise for this excellent contribution to the field of psychotherapy. If you or anyone you know suffers from this common condition, this episode and Chuck’s book are highly recommended!So, listen in as Chuck unpacks what we need to know about panic.

Have you ever needed to have a conversation but felt terrified to carry it out?

I'm sure that like all of us, you have. The sad thing is that few of us ever learned how to have difficult conversations.

Fear not—help is here! Two people who are experts at dealing with difficult conversations are the guests on this very episode. They are no strangers to this topic, nor are they strangers to SuperPsyched! They are none other than the powerful duo of Drs. Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt. Many years ago, they wrote the classic book Getting the Love You Want. I give this book out frequently to people at my practice and it yields great results. And Harville has been on the Oprah Winfrey show several times, the first of which became the episode that led Oprah to her first Emmy Award!

You will hear in this interview how these two masters of couple therapy have applied their tool called Safe Conversations to any type of potentially dangerous conversation: at the workplace, at home, or with friends talking about political differences that might get heated! I like thinking of Safe Conversations as being personal protective equipment to handle potentially combustible topics! Their new book is called How to Talk with Anyone about Anything: The Practice of Safe Conversations. I loved the book and was blown away by how applicable their technology for having Safe Conversations can be to any relationship.

So, listen in and learn how Harville and Helen can help you talk to anyone about anything.

There’s an ancient story of multiple blind men touching an elephant on different parts of its body. And each man emphatically states what the elephant is based on the body part. The guy touching the leg says the elephant is a tree trunk. The guy touching the ear says it’s a huge pancake. The guy at the tail says it’s a rope, and so on…

Like the elephant parable demonstrates, finding reliable, truthful information can be—to put it mildly—a huge challenge. Oftentimes, we’ll hear a story from one source and another source will contradict it. It can feel overwhelming to figure out what’s what.

A person who may be able to help us is Dr. Alex Edmans (https://alexedmans.com/), Professor of Finance at London Business School and author of a book I loved called May Contain Lies: How Stories, Statistics, and Studies Exploit Our Biases―And What We Can Do about It. The book received praise from scientific journals, the media, and thought leaders like Dr. Kim Milkman, a well-known professor at Wharton, who said it was “required reading.”Alex shares how we can think like scientists. He has strategies to help us find our way through the mire of contradicting data, find our way out of our own biases and cognitive distortions, and find our way into more accurate information. 

So, listen in as Alex helps us figure out what we can do to see that elephant more accurately. 

These days, we hear on 24-hour news channels that the United States is more fractured than ever. We’ve got red, we’ve got blue, and never shall the two see eye to eye.

Yet, in reality, we are more alike than we are led to believe. Think about it: is there anyone in your life who you love but who has different ideas as they relate to religion, politics, or any other divisive issue? I can think of many people, and I imagine you can too.

Further, Pew Research suggests that our opinions come from our parents as over 80% of us have ideals that are very close to those of our parents. I am confident there are ways we can find common ground as people whose parents think differently!

For this timely episode, I’m welcoming back UC Santa Barbara professor of psychology, Dr. Tania Israel. I first had her on the podcast four years ago when she had written her acclaimed book on speaking to people outside our bubbles and now for her new book, Facing the Fracture: How to Navigate the Challenges of Living in a Divided Nation. Tania shares ways we can connect with people from our shared humanity despite our differences, and she dispels myths that we are so different as we’re being led to believe.

So, listen in as Tania talks with us about facing the fracture and connecting with people who we’ve been led to believe are so different from ourselves.

Source: https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/05/10/most-us-parents-pass-along-their-religion-and-politics-to-their-children/