Feminist Wellness

Tenderoni Hotline #4: Why People Get Defensive About Your Feelings + What Emotional Outsourcing Really Means


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Tenderoni Hotline #4: Hello my love! Welcome back to the Tenderoni Hotline, our cozy corner of the Feminist Wellness podcast where I answer your most tender, honest, and heartfelt questions about healing, self-trust, and nervous system care.

 

In today’s episode, we’re exploring what happens when you finally find the courage to speak your truth, only to be met with defensiveness, blame, or long explanations that leave you feeling unseen and small. We’ll talk about why this happens in the body, how your nervous system perceives defensiveness as danger, and how your own body might freeze, fawn, or shut down in response. You’ll learn somatic tools to help you stay grounded in your truth, even when the person in front of you can’t meet you there.

 

We’ll also unpack what emotional outsourcing really means and how codependent, perfectionist, or people-pleasing habits actually live in the body. You’ll discover how your nervous system learned early on to locate safety, love, and belonging in other people’s moods or opinions, and how somatic work can gently rewire that pattern so you can begin to feel safe inside yourself again.

 

This conversation is tender, compassionate, and rooted in science. Because you deserve relationships where honesty feels safe, boundaries are respected, and love doesn’t require self-abandonment.

 

Got a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: [email protected]

 

Order your copy of End Emotional Outsouring here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/

 

Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en

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Feminist WellnessBy Béa Victoria Albina

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