Here’s a story you’ve lived before, even if you don’t realize it yet.You meet someone. The connection is immediate, intoxicating—like a chemical reaction you can’t control. The texts flow effortlessly. The future feels possible. Then, without warning, the shift: one of you pulls back. The other panics. And just like that, you’re locked in the oldest romantic pattern in human psychology—the anxious-avoidant dance.This isn’t just about bad timing or mismatched feelings. This is about how our earliest experiences wire us to love in ways that hurt.And if you don’t understand the mechanism, you’ll keep stepping on the same landmine, wondering why it keeps exploding.<a target="_blank" href="https://www.buzzsprout.com/twilio/text_messages/2001000/open_sms">I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. </a><a rel="payment" href="https://www.buzzsprout.com/2001000/support">Support the show</a>

Here’s a story you’ve lived before, even if you don’t realize it yet. You meet someone. The connection is immediate, intoxicating—like a chemical reaction you can’t control. The texts flow effortlessly. The future feels possible. Then, without warning, the shift: one of you pulls back. The other panics. And just like that, you’re locked in the oldest romantic pattern in human psychology—the anxious-avoidant dance. This isn’t just about bad timing or mismatched feelings. This is about how our earliest experiences wire us to love in ways that hurt. And if you don’t understand the mechanism, you’ll keep stepping on the same landmine, wondering why it keeps exploding. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show

Here’s a story you’ve lived before, even if you don’t realize it yet.You meet someone. The connection is immediate, intoxicating—like a chemical reaction you can’t control. The texts flow effortlessly. The future feels possible. Then, without warning, the shift: one of you pulls back. The other panics. And just like that, you’re locked in the oldest romantic pattern in human psychology—the anxious-avoidant dance.This isn’t just about bad timing or mismatched feelings. This is about how our earliest experiences wire us to love in ways that hurt.And if you don’t understand the mechanism, you’ll keep stepping on the same landmine, wondering why it keeps exploding.<a href="https://www.buzzsprout.com/twilio/text_messages/2001000/open_sms" rel="noopener noreferrer">I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. </a><a href="https://www.buzzsprout.com/2001000/support" rel="noopener noreferrer">Support the show</a>

The Anxious Avoidant Trap And How to Get Out

Why you keep picking the same fights. Why you feel so needy or so smothered. Let's talk about why your relationships play out the way they do, and what you can actually do about it. I’m your host, Annalisa Bahadur. I have a psychology degree, I’m a coach, and most importantly, I’ve been in the trenches. I used to have major anxious attachment. I know what it's like to feel that constant anxiety, to need reassurance, to feel like the relationship is always on the brink of collapse. But I did the work to move toward secure. And I’m now almost five years into a happy, stable relationship with a recovering avoidant. I’m not talking theory from a textbook. I’m talking about what actually worked for me and my clients. This podcast is about attachment theory, stripped down to the basics. No fluff, no fancy language. Just straight talk about how your early wiring affects your adult relationships. In each episode, we break down the four attachment styles - Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Fearful-Avoidant.&nbsp;We'll look at how they show up in your dating life, your friendships, and even at work. You'll hear real stories and get practical steps you can use right now.We focus on two main tools: empathy and boundaries. <ul><li>Empathy to understand why you and the people you love act the way they do.</li><li>Boundaries to protect your own energy and stop cycles of drama and hurt.</li></ul> This isn't about blaming your parents or your exes. It's about giving you a roadmap to better relationships. You'll learn how to identify your patterns, communicate what you really need, and build connections that feel solid, not stressful.If you're tired of the same old problems and you're ready for real change, you're in the right place. Bonus- every Thursday you'll have a chance to listen in on real people as they share their struggles as I coach them through their challenges. Each individual has agreed to have these session recorded using a pseudonym, and aired for your benefit.&nbsp;

Health & Fitness

Mental Health

Education

Self-Improvement

Why you keep picking the same fights. Why you feel so needy or so smothered. Let's talk about why your relationships play out the way they do, and what you can actually do about it. I’m your host, Annalisa Bahadur. I have a psychology degree, I’m a coach, and most importantly, I’ve been in the trenches. I used to have major anxious attachment. I know what it's like to feel that constant anxiety, to need reassurance, to feel like the relationship is always on the brink of collapse. But I did the work to move toward secure. And I’m now almost five years into a happy, stable relationship with a recovering avoidant. I’m not talking theory from a textbook. I’m talking about what actually worked for me and my clients. This podcast is about attachment theory, stripped down to the basics. No fluff, no fancy language. Just straight talk about how your early wiring affects your adult relationships. In each episode, we break down the four attachment styles - Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Fearful-Avoidant.  We'll look at how they show up in your dating life, your friendships, and even at work. You'll hear real stories and get practical steps you can use right now. We focus on two main tools: empathy and boundaries. Empathy to understand why you and the people you love act the way they do.Boundaries to protect your own energy and stop cycles of drama and hurt. This isn't about blaming your parents or your exes. It's about giving you a roadmap to better relationships. You'll learn how to identify your patterns, communicate what you really need, and build connections that feel solid, not stressful. If you're tired of the same old problems and you're ready for real change, you're in the right place. Bonus- every Thursday you'll have a chance to listen in on real people as they share their struggles as I coach them through their challenges. Each individual has agreed to have these session recorded using a pseudonym, and aired for your benefit. 

Share The Anxious Avoidant Trap And How to Get Out

Sign up to save your podcasts

The Anxious Avoidant Trap And How to Get Out

The Anxious Avoidant Trap And How to Get Out

More shows like Decoding Attachment Styles

Love Life With Matthew Hussey

The Mark Groves Podcast

LET’S TALK ATTACHMENTS

The Thais Gibson Podcast

Let’s Get Vulnerable: Relationship and Dating Advice

Heal Your Heartbreak

Unf*ck Your Relationships

On Attachment

Jillian on Love

The Mel Robbins Podcast

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle

The Sabrina Zohar Show

Love Strategies: Dating and Love Advice for Successful Women

Dating Intentionally

The Love Doc Podcast