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A few months ago, I was in a conversation that started to go sideways. I could feel the tension rising—the tightening in my chest, my voice getting sharper. I knew exactly what was happening. I've studied this. I've taught this. I know what Marcus Aurelius would say. And in that moment, it was like I'd never read a word of Stoicism. 

If you've spent any time with this philosophy, you've probably had your own version of this experience. The email lands and you spiral. The criticism stings and you're devastated. Someone cuts you off and you react exactly the way Epictetus said not to. This is the gap between knowing and doing—and it's the central challenge of practicing philosophy. 

In this episode, I explore why the philosophy disappears when we need it most, what Seneca confessed about this exact problem 2,000 years ago, and why more reading isn't the answer. Spoiler: the Stoics weren't building a library. They were building a gymnasium for the soul. 

In this episode:

• The moment I knew exactly what to do—and didn't do it 
• Why intellectual understanding is not the same as embodied skill 
• What Seneca admitted about knowing vs. practicing 
• The difference between studying Stoicism and training as a Stoic 
• A reflection question to sit with after listening