The Marriage Life Coach Podcast

If there’s something in your life that you want and don’t currently have, this episode is for you. I am excited to share some ideas about how to think about goals differently.

Recently, I started working towards a goal of my own that’s felt pretty elusive, honestly. 

During this process, I noticed I had the thought, “This is just as likely as going to Mars.” Which made me feel really defeated.

To feel like one of our goals is impossible just leaves us feeling like there’s nowhere left to go.

But the next morning, I woke up and thought, 

“Okay. If NASA was going to Mars, how would they do it? What would their actual step-by-step process be to getting to Mars?” 

And of course I came up with a few ideas, like desire, budget, plan. And that led me to wondering what that would look like for me and my goal, if I distilled this big process down to the main things I would need to do…

And that’s what I want to share with you today. 

So think about something YOU want, that’s yours and yours alone (meaning, something you have control over to a certain degree) and let’s get ready to apply these four principles to what you want to accomplish.

Listen and learn more about:

• How to be very clear about what you want

• The power of committing more to the process than the outcome

• Dispelling the idea that you have to accomplish your goals alone

• Why you should also think about what’s in the way of your goals

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

• Episode 96: Thought Work and The Self Coaching Model

• Episode 62: Curiosity, Coaching, and Using Your Superpowers In Your Marriage with Lindsay Dotzlaf

• Episode 39: Soul Centered Communication

• Episode 76: Trauma, Resourcing, and Windows of Tolerance with Shelby Leigh

• The Questions for Couples Journal

• Private Coaching with Maggie Reyes

• The Marriage Mindset Makeover

On this special episode of The Marriage Life Coach Podcast, I’m sharing a rich, deep conversation I had with fellow coach Melissa Parsons on her podcast, Your Favorite You. This collaboration with my dear friend was so impactful that I asked permission to also share it with my audience, so that’s what you’ll be hearing today. 

It’s a sensitive topic, the urge to control. Mostly that urge comes from a desire to feel safe. Overworking, taking over responsibility – my hypothesis is that it all comes from a quest for safety. We think if we establish control, we can be more safe and feel better. 

But really, more often than not, that control leads to resentment, overworking, and burnout, which is exactly what Melissa and I unpack in this episode. 

As much as we might try to control others, we can only truly control ourselves. So what if we harness the power of influence, instead? How could we use our influence in a kinder, more compassionate way to get more of what we want without causing the harm that control does? 

What you’ll learn in this episode:

- Recognize the difference between trying to control others and positively influencing them. True influence comes from connection and understanding, not from imposing your will.

- Authenticity is key in relationships. It’s important to be honest about your feelings and experiences, even when it’s difficult. 

- Life is full of dualities, and it's important to hold space for seemingly contradictory truths. For example, you can be strong and still need support, or you can be independent while deeply valuing connection.

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

• Episode 29: Releasing the Need to be Right with Dr. Melissa Parsons

• Episode 99: The Power of Going First with Melissa Parsons

• Your Favorite You Episode 98: Influence vs Control with Maggie Reyes

• The Questions for Couples Journal

• The Marriage Mindset Makeover

On this episode of The Marriage Life Coach Podcast, I’m delighted to be joined by a graduate of my Marriage MBA program, Sae Mickelson. 

Sae is a Chinese medicine practitioner and acupuncturist who spends much of her time with clients through a lens of discovery and growth. In her many years doing this work, she’s observed the connection between balance and wellness. And in her time in the Marriage MBA, she was able to draw the same connection more deeply by applying it to her relationship. 

Balance and wellness are terms we all tend to have our own definition of, and I think you’ll love hearing Sae’s perspective of these concepts and others she shared. Her wealth of wisdom from her medicinal background and willingness to be open about her experience of the Marriage MBA were just a breath of fresh air! 

Listen in to our conversation to hear more from Sae’s heart about:

• How to zoom out and take the long view of life and relationships

• The power of asking “What’s my next small choice?”

• Western culture’s impact on our relationships

• Creating awareness of your natural cycles 

On this episode of The Marriage Life Coach Podcast, I’m joined by client Maya LeaJames. 

Maya is a parent coach who helps moms become more conscious in their relationships with their kids. Maya and I just spent six months together in my last group coaching cohort. I am truly delighted to have her on the show to share some of her favorite takeaways and what concepts she found highly valuable and impactful on her own marriage. 

In this episode we share principles from my teaching and coaching philosophy that you can apply to help any relationship, whether it’s marriage or parenting or friendships. 

Check out this episode to hear more about:

- Marriage Relationship Tools like closed-loop communication and assuming positive intent that can you can learn today and apply tomorrow - they are that simple and yet deeply impactful

- How thinking of relationships as collaborative impacts the way you show up every day

- How to get off relationship autopilot and bring more intention to your day to day choices as a wife

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

• Episode 58: The Power of One

• The Questions for Couples Journal

• The Marriage Mindset Makeover

On this episode of The Marriage Life Coach Podcast, I’m joined by my guest Jewel Hohman, who’s literally an expert in helping adults learn how to make friends. Jewel is a return guest, and I feel so much joy whenever I get to speak with her. I particularly love her extensive knowledge about something every adult has struggled with at some point: making friends! 

Did you know there’s an actual science to making friends? You could call Jewel a friendship scientist of sorts. Pulling from her master’s in social work as well as her coach training, she has studied the science of friendship to a degree that just delights me. 

I think you’ll appreciate the insight she shared on the research around our current loneliness epidemic and the jaw-dropping facts about our society at large – like 1 in 5 millennials reporting that they had no close friends. Take a deep breath with that one. I did. 

We end up relying so much on our partners for deep emotional support, when really, cultivating meaningful friendships in addition to our partnerships can help all of our relationships become stronger. 

Listen in and learn more about:

• The science of friendship

• 3 things every thriving relationship has in common

• How to create meaningful relationships

• Being a good friend to yourself

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

• Episode 124: Cultivating Intentional Relationships with Jewel Hohman

• Episode 54: Self Love

• Socially Delightful: Telling My BFFs How I Used Friendship Science to Make Them My Friends

• Jewel’s website

• Jewel’s podcast, Socially Delightful

• The Questions for Couples Journal

• The Marriage Mindset Makeover

This is a different episode than I’ve done before. With my amazing client’s permission, I break down the major elements of our 6 months of work together, and how she’s going to keep our work alive after we part ways.

One of the main reasons people seek out coaching is because they want something to change, whether it's behavior, habits, or perspective. And when you have a coach, you have some built-in accountability to act on making those changes happen.

But what happens when our time together ends? My clients receive the tools to move forward and keep creating what they want to see in her life without me. With this particular client, we spent our final session going over all the changes she wanted to implement as a result of what she learned about herself and her relationship in coaching. 

That’s what I shared in today’s podcast episode, in hopes that you’ll find some ideas and inspiration behind the scenes of a private coaching session.

Listen in and find out:

• How to define what really matters to you

• The impact of support and where to find it

• Effective ways to make your goals your new normal

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

• Episode 96: Thought Work and The Self Coaching Model

• Episode 94: Notice Your Lenses

• Private Coaching with Maggie

• The Marriage Mindset Makeover

• The Questions for Couples Journal

Bridgerton is so special to me. I read all the books when they were written twenty years ago. I  was reading On the Way to the Wedding, the last book in the series, on the weekend that my husband proposed in Costa Rica. So these characters and stories mean a lot to me!

I used to read the books and think why isn’t anyone making a movie out of this? So when the show was announced, it was a fangirl dream come true. When the newest season was announced, I declared it my own holiday of Bridgerton Day. Yes I put it on the calendar and everything! I even asked my husband to stay home from work and watch with me. At the end of episode 4, I cried. I too was a late bloomer and it just hit me right in the feels. 

Once I finished watching season 3, I knew I wanted to make an episode to share some of my favorite observations, applied to marriage and relationships. 

And no you don’t have to love Bridgerton as much as I do to get something useful from this episode, but if you have never seen the show and have no interest in it, skip this one. I mention spoilers and character situations very specifically that might not be as much fun if you don’t know who and what I am talking about. 

I ended up with 10 concepts to share with you in this episode that I believe will land with you no matter where you are in your relationship currently. I also make a big announcement on this episode so you are definitely going to want to check that out, especially if you have been waiting for me to open up private coaching spots. 

If you have seen the show and find it fun, this episode is for you! Enjoy! 

Listen in and hear more about:

• Giving yourself permission to love what you love

• Asking for what you want

• Understanding what you need to thrive

• Why consent is so sexy

• The right way to wear rose-colored glasses

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

• Episode 62: Curiosity, Coaching, and Using Your Superpowers In Your Marriage with Lindsay Dotzlaf
• The Questions for Couples Journal
• Private Coaching with Maggie
• The Marriage Mindset Makeover

On this episode of The Marriage Life Coach Podcast, I am joined by the wonderful Brig Johnson, one of my favorite humans on the whole planet. She is a master certified life coach who helps high-achieving women become un-fuck-withable. Her philosophy is that the more we can connect with and accept ourselves, the more we can connect with and accept others. 

Brig is someone who leads with compassion, wisdom, love, and science and I love her for it.

Our conversation today delves into ambivalence in our marriage or relationship. We all have different seasons of life where we’ll have to deal with ambivalence, and knowing how to approach it effectively is such a skill! How do we really feel about this issue? Our feelings can be so mixed or even contradictory… How do we know which thread to follow?

Brig is here to help us with that today. 

She’s sharing her deep wisdom and understanding about how to trust yourself, and the things that get in the way of feeling safe in our relationships. Most importantly, Brig is teaching us how to approach getting out of ambivalence and “going all in” with love and acceptance for ourselves and our partner. 

It’s SO good. Give our discussion a listen and check out the resources linked below to get the most out of this episode.

In this episode of The Marriage Life Coach Podcast, I’m joined by Tara Simkins, a life coach who helps people get through tough times to create meaningful lives. Our aim is to better understand perimenopause/menopause, especially how it affects our lives and naturally, our relationships.

But before we dive in, I want you to know you do not need to be going through menopause for everything we talk about today to apply to you! 

This episode will prepare you to be confident if/when you enter that chapter of your life, or whether you just use one of the takeaways right now to help you with whatever's feeling challenging in your relationship.

Just for clarity, perimenopause is a physiological and psychological shift in a woman's experience as they go towards menopause that can start as early as your late thirties. And on a societal level, almost NO ONE is talking about it and how it affects our lives and relationships.

We’re changing that today!

Join us for this episode to hear more about:

- Why women may feel shame around personal health 

- The stress perimenopause can put on relationships

- How to understand what your needs are and communicate them to your partner

- The importance of talking and learning more about perimenopause

Something miraculous happened to me recently and I knew that what I learned from it would help you have a stronger, better, more amazing relationship.

Physical therapy.

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t an actual miracle, and it’s not immediately obvious how my attending physical therapy is going to help your marriage, but stick with me! I promise it makes sense.

In this episode, I’ll share 6 lessons that I believe can help you have a better relationship right now. There are so many parallels I draw between my experience with physical therapy and some of the most common experiences with relationship struggles. 

There was pain. There was fear. There was the whole “I’m used to it” when it came to this particular problem (a clicky, painful knee, in my case). There were tons of completely reasonable-sounding excuses for why I didn’t need help, and why I didn’t try reaching out sooner.

Sound familiar?

I told you it would all make sense. Ready to hear how you can take this analogy and apply it to your marriage starting today?

Listen in and hear more about:

- Why it’s so important to stop waiting and take the big step forward

- How progress doesn’t always LOOK like progress

- What it means to believe things can be different

Find full show notes and links to resources at: http://maggiereyes.com/podcast/160