The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast

By Danielle BlackSociety & Culture Education Self-Improvement Relationships Parenting Kids & Family

The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast episodes

December 27, 2023 6. Unmasking D.A.R.V.O: Understanding how abusers distort reality
Have you ever felt bewildered by the shifting dynamics in a relationship, where suddenly you're the one being blamed?
This latest episode is a stark revelation of the DARVO tactic—Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender—used by abusers to evade responsibility and attack your reality.
We uncover the chilling strategies abusers use to distort reality, assaulting their victim's character to protect their own fragile self-worth.
This conversation is a must-hear, offering insights into the manipulative playbook that underpins abusive relationships.

Navigating the treacherous waters of psychological manipulation can leave victims disoriented and isolated. In this episode, we expose how abusers not only deny their victims' experiences but launch a counteroffensive aimed at reversing roles, painting themselves as the aggrieved party. The impact on victims' credibility and support systems can be devastating. This episode peels back the layers of these abusive dynamics, providing clarity and validation for anyone who has faced such bewildering and harmful treatment. Join me, Danielle Black, to unearth the unsettling truths of DARVO and bolster your understanding of these complex interpersonal battles.
The music you hear in this outro is 'Stronger, Braver, Together' - an original track created exclusively for the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast and Danielle Black Coaching.
About Danielle Black Coaching:
Danielle Black is a respected authority in child-focused post-separation parenting in Australia. With over twenty years’ experience across education, counselling and coaching - alongside her own lived experience navigating a complex separation and family court journey - she supports parents to think strategically, build capacity, and protect their children’s safety and wellbeing within complex legal and relational systems.
Through Danielle Black Coaching, she leads a growing team of specialist coaches and a structured support ecosystem designed to provide professionally held, evidence-informed guidance for parents navigating high-conflict separation and family court processes.
Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au

This podcast is for educational purposes only and not legal advice. Please seek independent legal, medical, financial, or mental health advice for your situation.
11 min
December 25, 2023 5. Leaving an abusive relationship
My voice may crack a bit today, after an intense week of coaching sessions has left its mark, but the message I'm about to share transcends any hoarseness.
We're addressing the heart-wrenching process of contemplating separation or divorce, especially when the specter of abuse looms large and the stakes are immeasurably high. It's a journey fraught with emotional complexity, requiring not just careful consideration but, at times, meticulous planning for those in situations of manipulation and control.

This episode brings to light the harsh realities for those considering the tough decision to leave an abusive relationship, as well as unpacks the deceptive facade that can arise within couples counseling in such contexts.
I'm not just talking about the steps to recognise and escape an abusive dynamic, I'm providing an anchor—a community of support for those who feel isolated in their struggles. This conversation is a testament to the strength and resilience required on the path to safety and healing.
The music you hear in this outro is 'Stronger, Braver, Together' - an original track created exclusively for the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast and Danielle Black Coaching.
About Danielle Black Coaching:
Danielle Black is a respected authority in child-focused post-separation parenting in Australia. With over twenty years’ experience across education, counselling and coaching - alongside her own lived experience navigating a complex separation and family court journey - she supports parents to think strategically, build capacity, and protect their children’s safety and wellbeing within complex legal and relational systems.
Through Danielle Black Coaching, she leads a growing team of specialist coaches and a structured support ecosystem designed to provide professionally held, evidence-informed guidance for parents navigating high-conflict separation and family court processes.
Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au

This podcast is for educational purposes only and not legal advice. Please seek independent legal, medical, financial, or mental health advice for your situation.
21 min
December 19, 2023 4. Christmas chaos
Post-separation abuse and chaos at Christmas go hand in hand!
So what is it about Christmas, and other special holidays, that seem to bring out the worst in high-conflict abusers?
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Join me on this episode as we discuss the chaos that controlling and abusive people attempt to create during the festive season.
The music you hear in this outro is 'Stronger, Braver, Together' - an original track created exclusively for the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast and Danielle Black Coaching.
About Danielle Black Coaching:
Danielle Black is a respected authority in child-focused post-separation parenting in Australia. With over twenty years’ experience across education, counselling and coaching - alongside her own lived experience navigating a complex separation and family court journey - she supports parents to think strategically, build capacity, and protect their children’s safety and wellbeing within complex legal and relational systems.
Through Danielle Black Coaching, she leads a growing team of specialist coaches and a structured support ecosystem designed to provide professionally held, evidence-informed guidance for parents navigating high-conflict separation and family court processes.
Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au

This podcast is for educational purposes only and not legal advice. Please seek independent legal, medical, financial, or mental health advice for your situation.
11 min
December 19, 2023 3. It's not an anger problem...
Many mistakenly believe that 'anger' issues are responsible for why abusers behave the way they do.

The truth? No one gets hurt when someone feels an emotion.

People get hurt when someone chooses a behaviour.

Want to learn more? Keep listening!

The music you hear in this outro is 'Stronger, Braver, Together' - an original track created exclusively for the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast and Danielle Black Coaching.
About Danielle Black Coaching:
Danielle Black is a respected authority in child-focused post-separation parenting in Australia. With over twenty years’ experience across education, counselling and coaching - alongside her own lived experience navigating a complex separation and family court journey - she supports parents to think strategically, build capacity, and protect their children’s safety and wellbeing within complex legal and relational systems.
Through Danielle Black Coaching, she leads a growing team of specialist coaches and a structured support ecosystem designed to provide professionally held, evidence-informed guidance for parents navigating high-conflict separation and family court processes.
Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au

This podcast is for educational purposes only and not legal advice. Please seek independent legal, medical, financial, or mental health advice for your situation.
18 min
December 19, 2023 2. The unspoken reality of post-separation abuse
Women are often encouraged to leave abusive relationships by well-meaning others, but many are taken by surprise by the ongoing attempts to control and abuse by their ex-partner after separation.

Also surprising is the incredible lack of support for women and children AFTER separation.

Join me on the this episode as I begin the important conversation about the unspoken reality of post-separation abuse.
The music you hear in this outro is 'Stronger, Braver, Together' - an original track created exclusively for the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast and Danielle Black Coaching.
About Danielle Black Coaching:
Danielle Black is a respected authority in child-focused post-separation parenting in Australia. With over twenty years’ experience across education, counselling and coaching - alongside her own lived experience navigating a complex separation and family court journey - she supports parents to think strategically, build capacity, and protect their children’s safety and wellbeing within complex legal and relational systems.
Through Danielle Black Coaching, she leads a growing team of specialist coaches and a structured support ecosystem designed to provide professionally held, evidence-informed guidance for parents navigating high-conflict separation and family court processes.
Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au

This podcast is for educational purposes only and not legal advice. Please seek independent legal, medical, financial, or mental health advice for your situation.
17 min
December 19, 2023 1. What is post-separation abuse?
You may have heard about 'family violence' or 'domestic violence', or even 'coercive control'...but what about 'post-separation abuse'?

After separation, an abuser doesn't magically stop wanting power and control over his former partner. The attempts to gain and maintain control can take a number of different forms, and in some cases can last for years.

Tune in to this episode to hear my thoughts about post-separation abuse.

The music you hear in this outro is 'Stronger, Braver, Together' - an original track created exclusively for the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast and Danielle Black Coaching.
About Danielle Black Coaching:
Danielle Black is a respected authority in child-focused post-separation parenting in Australia. With over twenty years’ experience across education, counselling and coaching - alongside her own lived experience navigating a complex separation and family court journey - she supports parents to think strategically, build capacity, and protect their children’s safety and wellbeing within complex legal and relational systems.
Through Danielle Black Coaching, she leads a growing team of specialist coaches and a structured support ecosystem designed to provide professionally held, evidence-informed guidance for parents navigating high-conflict separation and family court processes.
Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au

This podcast is for educational purposes only and not legal advice. Please seek independent legal, medical, financial, or mental health advice for your situation.
10 min
December 10, 2023 The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast Trailer
Navigating the wilderness of high-conflict separation and post-separation abuse?
I support Australian women who are navigating ongoing control and other forms of abuse after separation.

Join me to break the silence, shatter the stigma and build a community of understanding and support. We are stronger, and braver, together.

The music you hear in this outro is 'Stronger, Braver, Together' - an original track created exclusively for the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast and Danielle Black Coaching.
About Danielle Black Coaching:
Danielle Black is a respected authority in child-focused post-separation parenting in Australia. With over twenty years’ experience across education, counselling and coaching - alongside her own lived experience navigating a complex separation and family court journey - she supports parents to think strategically, build capacity, and protect their children’s safety and wellbeing within complex legal and relational systems.
Through Danielle Black Coaching, she leads a growing team of specialist coaches and a structured support ecosystem designed to provide professionally held, evidence-informed guidance for parents navigating high-conflict separation and family court processes.
Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au

This podcast is for educational purposes only and not legal advice. Please seek independent legal, medical, financial, or mental health advice for your situation.
6 min

About The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast

From the publisher's feed

The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast

Hosted by Danielle Black

A direct, evidence-based podcast for people navigating all-things separation and divorce, including;…

post-separation abuse, family violence, parenting, property settlement and the family law system - with a relentless focus on protecting children and building a life beyond separation. Because, the advice your lawyer gives you is only the beginning. Family law tells you what the system can do. This podcast helps you understand what to seek, what to challenge, what to bring into the room - and how to live with the decisions, and move on with your life, afterwards.

Danielle Black is a specialist post-separation parenting coach and the founder and principal coach of Danielle Black Coaching. Having navigated her own complex separation, and guided hundreds of clients to successful outcomes, Danielle and her coaching team specialise in helping protective parents to optimise the outcome for themselves and their children, and support clients to navigate post-separation situations that other professionals don't properly address.

Drawing on her extensive tertiary qualifications, developmental science, research, trauma-informed practice and both professional and lived experience, she examines how abuse can continue after separation, how systems and professionals respond, and what genuinely informed decision-making and credible advocacy requires when risk, fear or power imbalance is present.

Because understanding family law is not enough.

Having a lawyer is not enough.

A lawyer can advise you about the law, legal process and evidence. But optimising your parenting outcome also requires knowledge of child development, attachment, coercive control and trauma; the capacity to remain strategic under pressure; and the confidence to advocate for what you and your children genuinely need.

This podcast examines all of those layers.

It challenges the assumptions that routinely shape post-separation outcomes: the fixation on 50/50 shared care, the misuse of “friendly parent” ideals, the belief that compromise is always constructive, and the fantasy that engaging the right professional means you can safely hand over the strategy, decision-making and advocacy.

Across the podcast, Danielle explores:

how post-separation abuse operates through parenting, financial and legal processes;
what children need after separation - and why adult notions of fairness are an inadequate guide;
what lawyers and other post-separation professionals were, and were not, trained to understand;
why standard co-parenting frameworks often fail families affected by coercive control and other forms of family violence and post-separation abuse;
how to assess the benefits, risks and real-world costs of negotiation, litigation and other pathways;
how knowledge, capacity and advocacy can materially change outcomes;
and what comes next, when separation and survival no longer occupy the centre of your life.

Expect direct language, research-backed analysis, practical guidance and a few cuss words - not platitudes, false balance or simplistic promises of justice.

This is not only about understanding what happened in your situation.

It is about making informed decisions now - and becoming the author, and authority, of what comes next.

To go deeper, explore The Post-Separation Parenting Blueprint™, Danielle’s flagship program for parents building the knowledge, capacity and advocacy skills needed to make informed, protective decisions after separation.

Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au.