Excessively conscientious Type C people find making mistakes excruciating since we hate disappointing other people, we hate letting them down. In this episode, Kore and Anna share stories about mistakes from their respective worlds and some strategies for better handling them.

Common issues for Type C'ers in committed relationships are avoiding conflict, not expressing emotions, taking on a partner's problems, and taking on too much domestic labor. On this episode, we talk about all of these issues and which tools we can use to improve the health of our relationships. 

We mention two books that we highly recommend: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman and Nan Silver and Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson.

A common thread with Type C’ers, who do so much for everyone else, is an underlying belief that their needs are more important than ours. Somewhere along the way, we have gotten the message that we were not worthy. Maybe this stemmed from abuse, excessive criticism, or significant invalidation from people early in our childhood. On this episode, we discuss how to overcome this sense of unworthiness and to accept our importance. 

One show note: we mention this book, Broken Open by Elizabeth Lesser, for anyone interested in reading it. 

Why do Type C people face such difficulty unplugging? We can be pathological when it comes to checking emails and texts, worried that we are letting someone down. In this episode, we share stories about the costs of not unplugging and talk about how to take small steps to practice doing it.

For Type C people, the strength of connections and relationships can be a challenge.  We often feel lonely because we are afraid to express our opinions or because we can’t be vulnerable with other people because we don’t want to upset them. We also might feel guilty about burdening other people with our problems.  This wonderful New York Times article is a great resource.

It's especially important for Type C'ers to be aware of burnout during the holiday season, we often ignore the signals from our own bodies.

Type Cer's often struggle with falling and staying asleep. Suppressing emotions, focusing on others, staying busy trying not to upset people – this can all increase adrenaline in our bodies. Sometimes sleep issues relate to negative stress, though positive stress can also contribute - like not recognizing that we’re doing too much. In this episode, Kore and Anna discuss strategies for getting better sleep and making peace with our sleep troubles.

Money is a complicating factor in a lot of relationships, and Type C people can find this dynamic extra challenging given the propensity to default to “yes” and feel like a bad person when saying “no”.  In this episode, Kore and Anna discuss many examples of sticky situations for Type C when it comes to money, and how to handle them.

For Type C people, it's very easy to get caught up in doing things for other people and not being intentional with our precious time. We can fall into a trap of “I will do that when I finish this,” or “Let me just finish this one thing” - and we end up with a to-do list that never ends!  It’s so important to really evaluate what we are spending time on - are there things that we have really thought about and want to be present with?

Alcohol has several benefits in the short term for people with Type C traits - it can help us feel emotions like stress and guilt less intensely, and it can create a feeling of distance from challenging situations and other stressors. It can help us make time for ourselves - which is such a struggle when sober - and it can help us be more expressive and more assertive. In this episode, Kore and Anna discuss alcohol as a coping mechanism and offer strategies to help.

Type C people - who avoid conflict and always maintain a pleasant facade - can find navigating the medical system very challenging, especially those dealing with chronic or invisible illnesses. It can be difficult to advocate for ourselves and to argue with respected physicians.

Women are particularly vulnerable to being ignored by doctors; there is a long history of women being viewed as hysterical and as hypochondriacs. Two terrific books on this topic are Unwell Women by Elinor Clighorn and The Lady’s Handbook for her Mysterious Illness by Sarah Ramey; both explore personal journeys of navigating the medical system with mysterious conditions and having to fight tooth and nail to be heard and treated.