The Virtual Couch

Rachel Nielson, the host of the popular podcast 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms (http://3in30podcast.com) makes a return visit to The Virtual Couch to discuss the challenges of finding the right therapist for you, and/or your kids. Rachel talks about what first led her to therapy, and how a negative experience with her first therapist didn't stop her from continuing to find a therapist who could, and would, help her through some difficult times in her life.

Rachel and Tony cover how to find a good therapist, what a good fit looks like, how to transition from one therapist to another, and some of the challenges that still exist around the negative stigmas and stereotypes that surround going to therapy.

You can find Rachel's first visit to The Virtual Couch, where she talks about the difficulties, and blessings, of going through both In-vitro fertilization as well as open adoption at the same time, here https://www.tonyoverbay.com/2018/05/07/episode-54-in-vitro-fertilization-and-open-adoption-w-rachel-nielson-host-of-3-in-30-takeaways-for-moms/ And Rachel, along with another "Friend of the Couch" Amanda Packer, host of the About Progress Podcast, have a course for those interested in creating their own podcasts that you can learn more about here http://podcastuniversity.mykajabi.com/

Tony appeared twice on Rachel's podcast, first in the episode How to Praise Your Child When it Feels Like There is Nothing to Praise, with Tony Overbay, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist which can be found here https://3in30podcast.com/episodes/praise/

And then Tony appeared on an episode titled How to Earn (And Keep) Your Kid's Trust which you can find here https://3in30podcast.com/episodes/teens-trust/

Tony Overbay's new book, co-authored with author Joshua Shea (The Addiction Nobody Will Talk About: How I Let My Pornography Addiction Hurt People and Destroy Relationships https://amzn.to/2O0KxAd) He's A Porn Addict...Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions, is now available on Amazon, you can find it here https://amzn.to/2KylIcz

And you can find out more about Tony's pornography recovery program The Path Back by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit http://tonyoverbay.com and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs, and podcasts.

The Virtual Couch is sponsored by http://Betterhelp.com/virtualcouch Betterhelp.com is the world's leading provider of online therapy. Their mission is to make professional counseling accessible, affordable, and convenient, so anyone who struggles with life's challenges can get help, anytime, anywhere. Head to http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch for 10% off your first month of services.

One of the requests that I receive the most is to do an episode on psychopaths vs. sociopaths or narcissists. In this episode, I cover all three, including a fascinating article in The Atlantic, "Life as a Nonviolent Psychopath" https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/01/life-as-a-nonviolent-psychopath/282271/ where interviewer Judith Ohikuare talks to American neuroscientist Dr. James Fallon. Dr. Fallon is a professor of psychiatry and human behavior and emeritus professor of anatomy and neurobiology at the University of California, Irvine School of Medicine.

Dr. Fallon found an amazing discovery when he looked at functional brain scans of a control group for Alzheimer's research alongside scans of violent murderers. This discovery led him to write the book "The Psychopath Inside: A Neuroscientist's Personal Journey into the Dark Side of the Brain." https://amzn.to/33fozhN

I also reference Dr. Traci Stein's article from Psychology Today "Narcissist or Sociopath? Similarities, Differences and Signs"     https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-integrationist/201608/narcissist-or-sociopath-similarities-differences-and-signs as well as an article that briefly describes the differences between a sociopath and a psychopath https://www.healthyplace.com/personality-disorders/psychopath/psychopath-vs-sociopath-what-s-the-difference

Tony Overbay's new book, co-authored with author Joshua Shea (The Addiction Nobody Will Talk About: How I Let My Pornography Addiction Hurt People and Destroy Relationships https://amzn.to/2O0KxAd) He's A Porn Addict...Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions, is now available on Amazon, you can find it here https://amzn.to/2KylIcz

And you can find out more about Tony's pornography recovery program The Path Back by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit http://tonyoverbay.com and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs, and podcasts.

The Virtual Couch is sponsored by http://Betterhelp.com/virtualcouch Betterhelp.com is the world's leading provider of online therapy. Their mission is to make professional counseling accessible, affordable, and convenient, so anyone who struggles with life's challenges can get help, anytime, anywhere. Head to http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch for 10% off your first month of services.

One of the most unproductive phrases Tony hears in couples counseling is “I’m just playing Devil’s advocate?” Are you? Or are you trying to poke holes in your partner’s reality? Only the “devil” in this scenario truly knows, but regardless, there’s even a productive way to GET TO the playing of the role of “devil’s advocate” and that is by first creating an environment where you are able to hear your partner, truly hear them, and create an environment where they feel safe, heard, like they can trust you. THEN if you still feel the need to question the floor may in fact be open for questions AND your partner may be in a better position to entertain your questions.

Tony also gives the origin of the “Devil’s advocate” (hint, it was an actual position back in olden times!) as well as a few fun facts about Halloween. He also shares his favorite, yet most obnoxious, two-line joke, a holdover from the “Humor in Therapy” episode.

In this episode Tony gives an emotionally focused therapy (EFT) refresher from the folks at Goodtherapy.com you can find that here https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/types/emotionally-focused-therapy He also shares the history of the term Devil’s Advocate, that can be found here https://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/devils-advocate.html and the ever-classic two-line jokes from the Humor in Therapy episode of the Virtual Couch can be found at the Boredpanda.com site here https://www.boredpanda.com/funniest-two-line-jokes/

Tony Overbay's new book, co-authored with author Joshua Shea (The Addiction Nobody Will Talk About: How I Let My Pornography Addiction Hurt People and Destroy Relationships https://amzn.to/2O0KxAd) He's A Porn Addict...Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions, is now available on Amazon, you can find it here https://amzn.to/2KylIcz

And you can find out more about Tony's pornography recovery program The Path Back by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit http://tonyoverbay.com and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs, and podcasts.

The Virtual Couch is sponsored by http://Betterhelp.com/virtualcouch Betterhelp.com is the world's leading provider of online therapy. Their mission is to make professional counseling accessible, affordable, and convenient, so anyone who struggles with life's challenges can get help, anytime, anywhere. Head to http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch for 10% off your first month of services.

Pastor Chris Jung of Summit Christian Church (http://mysummit.church), located in Lincoln, CA, joins Tony to discuss the challenges of discussing mental health-related topics such as anxiety, depression, and suicide in the faith community. The podcast begins with a one-on-one interview with Pastor Chris where he discusses his path toward church service, including his own mental health struggles that came with many of the challenges that he faced in leading both large and small youth and adult ministries across the country. Chris and Tony then spend some time discussing the topic of suicide, including the suicide of a couple of high-profile ministers over the past year. The give some very practical tips on how to talk about suicide with those around you and what to do if you believe someone may be experiencing suicidal thoughts or ideations.

After the interview, Tony includes the message from Summit Christian Church at approximately the 1:11 (one hour and eleven minute) mark.

If you, or someone that you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts or ideations please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. And Tony refers to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention website where you can learn how to spot behaviors that may be warning signs of suicidal behavior https://afsp.org/

You can pre-order Tony's new book: He's a Porn Addict, Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions here https://msipress.com/product/hes-a-porn-addict-now-what-an-expert-and-a-former-addict-answer-your-questions/ And you can find out more about Tony's pornography recovery program The Path Back by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit http://tonyoverbay.com and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs, and podcasts.

The Virtual Couch is sponsored by http://Betterhelp.com/virtualcouch Betterhelp.com is the world's leading provider of online therapy. Their mission is to make professional counseling accessible, affordable, and convenient, so anyone who struggles with life's challenges can get help, anytime, anywhere. Head to http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch for 10% off your first month of services.

Beckie Hennessy, LCSW joins Tony to talk about the Love and Logic parenting method. From the Love and Logic website https://www.loveandlogic.com/a/info/love-and-logic-parenting “Raise happy and well-behaved kids with positive, loving tools. The Love and Logic approach to parenting is built around the science of caring and respectful relationships. An authentic, loving connection between parents and their children forms the foundation of good behavior and healthy decision-making.

Sounds easy enough but never before in history have parents been faced with so many challenges! Our approach provides a variety of simple and effective strategies for parenting children from birth to adulthood. Whether you’re embarking for the first time with your new baby or navigating the turbulent teens with your child, our strategies and techniques will help you create calm and loving solutions."

Beckie was born and raised in West Valley City, Utah where she currently resides with her husband of 15 1/2 years and their 3 children. Beckie has been a therapist/coach since 2007 and currently owns BRICKS Family Counseling, Inc as well as Beckie Hennessy, LCSW, LLC. Beckie is an independent facilitator for Love and Logic. She has a podcast called The Path of Imperfection and has also written a book called Ministering Through Connection. Her best days are spent with her family as they watch movies together, blow bubbles in their chocolate milk and laugh until tears come. She loves to read, is a Pinterest addict and enjoys taking naps when she’s able.

IG: @beckie.hennessy.lcsw
FB: Beckie Hennessy, LCSW
Website: beckiehennessy.com
Love and Logic: loveandlogic.com

https://www.loveandlogic.com/?gclid=CjwKEAjwiq-oBRC9gvHCsvDdn2cSJACV3DFR4eKtxmruJeQwAyrP7sSdBjQ2AUzkKa06lnm07uQBaxoC95rw_wcB

Brene Brown on Boundaries

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5U3VcgUzqiI&t=1s

You can pre-order Tony's new book: He's a Porn Addict, Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions here https://msipress.com/product/hes-a-porn-addict-now-what-an-expert-and-a-former-addict-answer-your-questions/ And you can find out more about Tony's pornography recovery program The Path Back by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit http://tonyoverbay.com and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs, and podcasts.

The Virtual Couch is sponsored by http://Betterhelp.com/virtualcouch Betterhelp.com is the world's leading provider of online therapy. Their mission is to make professional counseling accessible, affordable, and convenient, so anyone who struggles with life's challenges can get help, anytime, anywhere. Head to http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch for 10% off your first month of services.