Tiny Leaps, Big Changes

In this episode, we look at how your environment affects your day to day behavior. 

The Problem

We often make the mistake when trying to develop ourselves and improve our lives by just focusing on the actual behavior change. This matters. Of course if we get ourselves to stop doing something it would lead to some kind of change in our outcome. But it’s not the whole picture.

This is proven by the sheer number of people who commit themselves to development each year only to drop off within a few months.

Here’s how it typically happens. We get excited about the chance to start clean. We set our goals, get some friends involved to hold us accountable, and start taking action.

But yet change doesn’t come. What’s going on?

Resources:

https://philadelphia.cbslocal.com/2016/02/09/new-study-reveals-how-long-new-years-resolutions-usually-last/

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2019/01/16/thursday-january-17-day-most-new-years-resolutions-fail/2539402002/

In this episode, we look at how curiosity can change your life. 

Blinkist: http://blinkist.com/tinyleaps

In this episode, we look at why motivation sometimes doesn't work. 

Civil Rights: www.andstillivote.org

In this episode, we look at whether or not self-help might be holding you back in life. 

Join Better Help: http://betterhelp.com/tinyleaps

In this episode, we look at how to get out of your comfort zone. 

Sponsor: 

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In this episode, we look at how to grow without leaving people behind. 

In this episode, we look at whether or not you  can actually catch up on sleep. 

In this episode, we talk about how to be confident in your goals as you try to create change in your life. 

Sponsor: www.greenchef.com/tinyleaps80 

In this episode, we look at how to stop impulse buying. 

Ad: http://blinkist.com/tinyleaps

The Problem

In 2017, Americans spent $240 billion—twice as much as they’d spent in 2002—on goods like jewelry, watches, books, luggage, and telephones, according to the Bureau of Economic Analysis.

Spending on personal care products also doubled over that time period. Americans spent, on average, $971.87 on clothes last year, buying nearly 66 garments, according to the American Apparel and Footwear Association. That’s 20 percent more money than they spent in 2000 adjusted for inflation.

At the same time, Americans are taking up more space. Last year, the average size of a single-family house in America was 2,426 square feet, a 23 percent increase in size from two decades ago, according to the Harvard Joint Center for Housing Studies. The number of self-storage units is rapidly increasing as well.  There are around 52,000 such facilities nationally; two decades ago, there were half that number.

Digging Deeper

Why do we buy so much stuff anyway? Research shows there are many reasons why we feel compelled to buy what we really don’t need.

And the one we will talk about today – advertising and its effect on us.

The Solution

So how do we deal with this?

Here are a few ways to get your buying impulse under control.

· Push the pause button in your mind, instead of the buy now button.  Logically contemplate what draws you to that product in the first place.  Was it the lure of the ad, or do you really need it?

· Quiet your consumer brain.  Take a deep breath and let the moment of absolutely having to have this shiny new thing pass.

· Make sure you know and understand that you cannot buy happiness.  Happiness does not come from an item. If you are not happy now, nothing you will buy can change that.

· Do the things that will really make you happy. Much of our purchases are done to make us feel better – find another way to feel better.  Get up and go for a walk, call a friend, or read a book, or learn a new recipe.

One tangible step: Implement a two day rule. If you are making a purchase that isn’t an absolute necessity, wait two days before purchasing. Doing so can remove you from the initial impulse and allow logic to take over.

In this episode we look at cognitive distortions, how they affect your personal growth, and what to do about them.

VOTE: www.andstillivote.org

The Problem:

I am sure this has happened to you. A disagreement with someone you care about, or one negative comment out of 10 other positive ones, and all of a sudden you’re in a spiral of negative thoughts about yourself, the other person and the event itself.

The problem is that these thoughts are more often than not inaccurate. They aren’t a good representation of what actually happened. Further, they are a completely made up representation of the event from the other person’s perspective.

Digging Deeper

Cognitive distortions are biased perspectives we put on ourselves and the world around us. They are patterns of thinking or believing that are irrational and that we unknowingly reinforce over time. These ways of thinking are harmful because, in general, we tend to act in accordance with our beliefs. So if our beliefs are false or inaccurate, naturally our actions will suffer as a consequence. Then those negative actions get reinforced as habits and all of a sudden we spend each day taking the wrong actions and making the wrong choices all because of a simple cognitive distortion.

In 1976, psychologist Aaron Beck first proposed the theory behind cognitive distortions and in the 1980s; David Burns was responsible for popularizing it with common names and examples for the distortions.

The Solution

How can you stop these cognitive distortions?

One way is to reframe the situation. "Reframing is the habit of consciously changing how you feel when you are experiencing an irrational or false thought or belief.”  You can ask yourself these questions:

Let’s take the example above using the cognitive distortion of a mental filter, remember that’s when you filter out all the positive stuff and focus on the negative. In that situation you could stop and think for a moment. Is this really true? Is this comment based in reality at all?

Examine the evidence: Is there anything to back up this person’s comment as fact or is it just one person’s opinion?