Unashamed Unafraid

In this episode of Unashamed, Unafraid, Sam and Austin recount returning to downtown Salt Lake City with their sign reading, “I’m a porn addict in recovery—ask me anything,” this time standing near Temple Square right after an LDS General Conference session. They compare the first outing—where strangers readily engaged and asked blunt questions—to this one, where many people looked away in visible shame, were with family, or may have assumed they were protesters. The hosts discuss how brotherhood matters in recovery, the challenge of church shame, and the importance of making public space feel safe while still inviting honest dialogue. They reflect on owning your story, rejecting the idea that only sober people can speak, note AA’s original reason for anonymity, and commit to doing the sign outreach again with clearer messaging and more supporters. 

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Timestamps:

01:09 The Sign
01:50 Brotherhood In Recovery
02:42 Last Time In Salt Lake
03:58 General Conference Context
05:41 Pizza Break Daniel
06:44 New Crowd New Shame
10:40 Fear Of Being Protesters
12:16 Camera Mistake Lessons
13:02 Why Public Vulnerability Heals
15:40 Owning Your Story 8 Mile
18:46 Talking Before Youre Sober
21:04 Anonymity Origin
22:51 Do It Again Invite Others
24:02 Jesus Rebel Energy

In this episode of Unashamed Unafraid, Jason Dausses returns to the show to do another session of live therapy with his clients, Sam and Mason, host and co-host of the podcast. 

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Timestamps:

01:35 Mason Check In
03:49 Sam Wants Sobriety
05:15 Calling Sam's Bluff
06:38 Finding a Real Why
07:43 What Porn Provides
09:16 Fear of Choosing Wife
10:57 Grief and Letting Go
13:11 Admitting You Love Porn
15:00 Beyond Morality Pressure
16:14 Find Your Real Why
17:20 Shame And Honest Confession
18:34 Multiple Whys Deeper Sobriety
20:15 False Self And Agreements
27:01 Acceptance Is Felt Not Thought
28:32 Safety And Deeper Vulnerability
30:30 Enneagram Three And Control
32:14 Silver Bullet Joe
33:06 Called Out And Closing Thanks

In this episode of Unashamed, Unafraid, the hosts discuss the “parts of ourselves” we want to kill—especially in sexual addiction recovery—and argue that shame-driven repression and white-knuckling only make things worse. Austin shares how growing up in a conservative culture led him to hide, berate, and try to “kill” his addiction, until he learned to face it with compassion: acknowledging the wounded, trauma-shaped part of himself without feeding compulsive behavior. The group explores identity, pushing back on making “addict” a permanent label, emphasizing being a son of God while distinguishing healthy desires from dark distortions. Using images like “hugging the cactus,” NF’s song “Running,” shadow work, and even Harry Potter, they describe confronting triggers, understanding what behaviors protect us from, and replacing shame and isolation with love, support, therapy, and faith.

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Timestamps:

00:43 Killing Parts of Yourself?
01:20 Austin On Shame
02:45 Hugging The Cactus
03:57 Labels And Identity
05:44 NF Running Trauma
09:23 White Knuckling Fails
09:57 Harry Potter Love
12:00 Triggers And Warfare
15:33 Shadow Work Advice
18:08 Closing And Wrap

In this episode of Unashamed Unafraid, Sam and Josh Bring back Michael from the Heare Bros (returning from a prior episode), who recaps his a spiritual/somatic session where he cast out the “accuser,” broke through a core belief of worthlessness, and felt transformative light and truth, then explains healing as increasing awareness, grieving wounds, and choosing connection over relapse. He discusses the process of healing and explains holotropic breathwork as a tool for accessing deeper consciousness, releasing pain, and connecting breath with spirit and God’s name, and offers resources for his Utah sessions and Hear Bros retreats.

Connect with Mike:
https://thelightinus.org
https://hearebros.com/

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Timestamps:

01:58 Why Jesus Had to Die
06:37 Meet Michael Again
12:41 Repentance Redefined
15:36 Guided Healing Session
23:10 Infinite Worth Moment
26:31 Light Truth Framework
31:47 Turning Up the Light
36:59 Healing Wounds Over Time
39:44 Wounds Keep Surfacing
40:16 Worth at the Core
40:48 Turning On the Lights
41:46 Grief Beneath Anger
43:14 Replacing Lies With Truth
44:18 Affirmations and Context
45:27 Moses and Being Nothing
48:42 Eastern View of Nothing
50:34 Breathwork as a Tool
51:30 Holotropic Breathwork Basics
52:47 Theta State and Subconscious
57:04 Technique and What to Expect
01:01:03 Breath as Spirit and Prayer
01:03:50 Name of God as Breath
01:07:17 Resources and Retreats

In this episode of Unashamed Unafraid, the hosts discuss healthy, non-compulsive sexuality in recovery and emphasize that sex isn’t the problem—shame is. They share experiences of growing up with little guidance, early sexual curiosity and experimentation, exposure to pornography in the internet age, and how silence and shame intensified addiction. The conversation reframes sexuality as sacred and God-given, meant for connection and creation, while warning that misuse can damage relationships with God and others. They stress normalizing frank, respectful conversations, creating safety and boundaries in marriage, and seeking help through therapy and resources like Jennifer Finlayson-Fife. They explore six types of intimacy, explain how unmet emotional needs become sexualized, and challenge listeners to ask what sex means to them and if married, what their spouse hears when they request sex.

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Timestamps:

00:43 Is Sex The Problem?
01:04 Early Shame And Silence
03:46 Internet Porn And Shame
06:10 Talking With Kids
08:14 Sex Sacred Not Secret
11:23 Healthy Sex And Humor
13:32 How To Start The Conversation
15:22 Resources And Cultural Shame
17:25 Utah OnlyFans Joke
17:49 Therapy Reframes Sex
18:56 Five Month Reset
20:29 Asking Without Shame
22:58 Six Types of Intimacy
26:06 Needs Behind Desire
31:11 Safety and Boundaries
34:27 Receiving Pleasure
35:23 Sex Reveals Healing
36:52 Challenges and Wrap Up

In this episode of Unashamed Unafraid, the hosts welcome Reuben Aiton, founder of Arise & Heal Recovery, who shares his background in addiction recovery coaching and his focus on helping teens and LDS clients move from external “kindling” motivations to internal, heart-based reasons for change. Reuben discusses his own story, including a pituitary tumor that delayed puberty, later struggles with pornography, and learning that sobriety can exist without true healing. He explains addiction as a disconnection issue where pornography is a “medication,” emphasizing connection with God, self, and others to raise awareness rather than fighting thoughts with more thoughts. Reuben describes a panic and claustrophobia crisis on a plane that led to new insights about stillness, surrender, and processing emotions without fixing them, and he outlines practical “primal” movement drills and daily habits to reboot the frontal lobe and reduce shame-driven relapse cycles.

Take advantage of Reuben's resources here at https://ariseheal.org/

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01:56 Meet Reuben Aiton
04:05 Why Teens Are Hard
06:06 Kindling Versus Log
08:24 Porn Is Not Problem
10:43 Reuben's Recovery Story
16:49 Panic Attack Flight
20:46 Alligator Thought Spin
22:53 Turning On The Light
25:21 Shame And God
27:44 The Atonement Is For You
29:04 Breaking Shame Goggles
30:20 Identity And Limiting Beliefs
32:34 Integrating Parts And Resistance
34:51 Process Emotions To Heal Beliefs
36:22 Urges As Pain Signals
43:46 Surrender Not Willpower
49:35 Resources And Contact Info
50:33 Eye Of The Tiger Wrap

In this episode of Unashamed Unafraid, Sam, Chris, Joshua, and Austin discuss sexual addiction recovery and why healing requires honesty, transparency, and coming unto Christ rather than hiding behind a so-called “noble lie” that hiding the truth somehow protects others. They praise Austin’s courage for disclosing a relapse after seven months and explore how lying creates unmanageable pain, escalates into a destructive web, and erodes trust in marriage by forcing a spouse to live in an untrue reality.  They emphasize that sobriety without transparency becomes “white knuckling,” recommend reaching out to brotherhood first after relapse to manage shame and take accountability without excuses, and note rare cases where disclosure may require professional guidance. They challenge listeners to identify where they don’t feel safe and take responsibility for creating safety rather than continuing to lie.

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Timestamps:
00:43 Podcast Welcome and Banter
01:21 Relapse Courage and Noble Lie
02:08 VeggieTales and Pinocchio Lies
04:39 Why Lying Feels Safe But Isn't
05:50 Transparency Builds Recovery
06:32 Spouse Reality and Betrayal
10:31 Accountability and Brotherhood
12:34 Disclosure Safety and Coaching
14:22 Shame Versus Shaming Quote
16:35 Create Safety and Challenge
18:21 Call to Action and Wrap Up

In this story episode of Unashamed, Unafraid, guest Paul Claverie opens up about navigating profound life crises, career shifts, personal accountability, and emotional healing. From managing his daughter’s cancer diagnosis to dealing with an unaddressed congenital deformity and performance-driven shame, Paul shares how pornography became an isolated coping mechanism—and how taking ownership of his health, finances, and personal agency ultimately helped him rebuild his life on solid ground.

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Timestamps:

00:00 – Podcast intro and mission
02:10 – Early career and background
06:15 – Overwhelming work and school
08:30 – Daughter's cancer diagnosis
10:45 – Losing heavy equipment job
16:20 – Pressure in aviation career
23:34 – Marital intimacy struggles
25:10 – Corrective surgery for deformity
28:30 – Overcoming pornography dependency
31:15 – Physical fitness in recovery
36:42 – Miscommunication regarding spiritual advice
38:50 – Accidental discovery of email
44:20 – Financial overhaul and independence
48:30 – Deciding to pursue divorce
52:08 – Song: Love Me At My Lowest by Nash Blackwood

In this episode of Unashamed, the hosts welcome back Austin and discuss sexual addiction recovery while working away from home. Austin shares that directing a demanding summer camp for 12–15-year-olds led to multiple relapses because he had no personal space, minimal sleep, and struggled to maintain safety and connection with God, while he stayed sober once home. The conversation explores why travel and high-pressure work often trigger acting out, the need to build a recovery lifestyle through structural changes, boundaries, and meeting basic needs like rest, food, and water. They reframe relapse as information rather than shame, discuss disciplined ways to “check out” safely, and emphasize listening to the body’s warning signals. Josh adds how losing 80 pounds and fitness improved his mental health and recovery. The episode ends with questions for listeners and a personal example of acting out due to lacking a plan at a family reunion.

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Timestamps:
00:43 Austin Returns to Unashamed
01:04 Inside the Summer Camp Mission
03:05 Recovery Update After Summer
05:56 Why Travel Triggers Acting Out
08:30 Building Boundaries and Alone Time
13:06 Relapse as Data Not Shame
14:34 Numbing Out and Healthy Rest
17:13 Listening to Your Body Needs
19:57 Fitness, Dopamine, and Discipline
22:45 Listener Questions and Takeaways
23:22 Closing Story and Wrap Up

In this episode of Unashamed Unafraid, Sam interviews Curtis Morley, who shifted from tech CEO and entrepreneur to “Emotionologist” after personal upheaval and a difficult divorce. Curtis explains his framework of “counterfeit emotions,” including shame as the counterfeit of guilt, misery as the counterfeit of pain, and sobriety as the counterfeit of recovery, emphasizing that recovery measures “how deep” rather than “how long.” He discusses dopamine dependence, why the problem is the need for pornography rather than pornography itself, and a bus metaphor for witnessing emotions and choosing authentic counterparts. Curtis outlines additional dyads (love/lust, kind/nice, excellence/perfectionism, joy/pleasure) and offers hope through his Be Whole method, plus shares the origin of his song “Whole Again,” inspired by his daughter’s healing after a rare blood disease.

- - -
Sign up or book a call with Curtis!
www.counterfeitemotions.com/recovery
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In the sobriety world you often hear the saying it’s only a matter of time until… you have another relapse. In the recovery world it’s only a matter of time until… you overcome this for good. 

Sobriety from pornography is only the first step, but most programs end there. It turns out that sobriety is actually the counterfeit of recovery. A false sense of security with blockers and filters but without curing the underlying issues. People have believed for decades that willpower and white knuckling is enough. That’s where the trap is. Sobriety is a life of fear and misery whereas recovery is full of joy and refined. There is so much hope for full recovery. Is possible. People are overcoming the struggle for good.  Freedom from the grind feels amazing to wake up every day with peace and hope. 

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Timestamps:

00:43 Sam's Recovery Check-In

02:00 Meet Curtis Morley - Emotionologist

02:59 Entrepreneur Dream Life

04:45 Divorce And Counterfeits

08:14 Pain Joy Breakthrough

10:47 Sobriety Versus Recovery

17:04 Digging Up The Demons

22:25 Lapse As A Gift

25:54 Identity Trap And Hope

28:39 Four Drivers Of Urges

30:58 What Recovery Really Means

32:38 Dopamine Cycle Explained

35:38 Rewriting Triggers for Peace

38:29 Emotional Bus Metaphor

39:28 Guilt vs Shame Research

43:20 Counterfeit Emotion Dyads

46:41 Authenticity and Peace

47:56 Hope and Be Whole Method

52:44 Whole Again Song Story