Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 87 - Trauma Series: How do you identify trauma? is now LIVE!
Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide
*****Trigger Warning - Mentions of: trauma, blood, sexual assault, verbal abuse, domestic abuse *******
Recognizing that an event was traumatic is the first step to acknowledging the effect that the trauma has had on us. This is fundamental for healing. In this episode we discuss why it is very rare to be able to recognize trauma as it is happening, the different types of trauma responses, how to support yourself if you recognize that you are having a trauma response and the ways we tend to downplay trauma.
In this episode, we cover…
How most times you can’t recognize trauma when you’re in it
How when a person is experiencing trauma, the logical part of the brain shuts down to some degree - in some cases completely to deal with the situation
Why it’s important to be gentle with yourself in these circumstances and not expect to rationalize a situation while it’s happening
Claire and Serena share some physical indicators of how the body responds to trauma. These may be different for different people and in different situations
The importance of naming the event as a trauma so that we can start healing from it
Claire and Serena share some things you can do to support yourself when you recognize that you’re having a reaction to trauma, especially supporting the vagus nerve (like deep breathing or “voo” breathing)
Most of us likely have a “go-to” trauma response that was established early in our lives
How there are 7 trauma responses: fight, flight, freeze, fawn, flood, fatigue/flop, friend and we give examples of each
How trauma responses are reactions to are unmet needs and are subconscious and how that is different from someone manipulating the situation through weaponizing a trauma response
While there is generally a “go-to” trauma response, different trauma responses can come up in different situations
How numbing is a reaction to a trauma, not a trauma response. This happens when we avoid the feelings that come up with our unmet needs. It, however, prevents us from healing
Reminder that your trauma is valid, no matter how big or small
How it can take some time to identify that a situation was traumatic
Serena shares her experience of identifying a particular traumatic event
The ways we tend to downplay trauma due to societal conditioning:
1. We view other people’s trauma as more severe than ours
2. We recognise that someone’s else’s behavior towards us is due to trauma, the trauma chain reaction that can cause and how understanding this does not make it ok
3. As a subconscious strategy to try and protect our needs
We give examples in terms of needs
How our responsibility to heal our own trauma is not only for our benefit, but also for those around us as our behavior as a reaction to having sustained trauma may impact others
How you can offer support without “rescuing” someone from their trauma as this is disempowering
How you can be supportive whilst holding someone else accountable
How time does not heal, it just creates distance between us and the traumatic event
How we can sometimes proactively try to avoid a traumatic event
How when we are in a traumatic behavioral pattern that repeats itself, we can get a trauma response from the pattern itself
Why self-preservation behaviors can compromise other needsEpisode 28 - An antidote to anxietyOur resilience episode is
Episode 51 - How to increase your resilience
The episodes in which we mention “voo breathing” are: Episode 19 - The C-word and Episode 28 - An antidote to anxiety
Episode 72 - Burning the candle at both ends series - Same shit, different day
Episode 86 - Trauma Series: What is trauma?
The episode we refer to relationship orbits is Episode 17 - What to do when you're waiting for an apology that will never come.
