Language of Love with Dr. Laura Berman

When You want to Go But Your Partner Threatens to Hurt Themselves if You Do!


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Have you ever been in a relationship where your partner has threatened to hurt themselves if you leave? 

Unfortunately, this is a surprisingly common situation that I hear from a lot of you. In today’s Language of Love Bite, I want to equip you with a few tools to navigate a situation with someone who is either genuinely at risk or might be using suicidal thoughts as emotional blackmail. The tips I outline will hopefully give you some comfort and peace when navigating a stressful situation such as this. 

In this Bite, I explore:

  • What emotional manipulation looks like 
  • The important difference between Suicidal thoughts/ideation vs. a suicidal plan
  • How to spot some of the red flags in someone at risk
  • Steps to take to leave the relationship in a way that leaves your partner protected. 

  • If you’re afraid that your partner is going to hurt themselves and don’t know what to do, call a clinician, 1-800-273-8255, or dial the suicide hot line 988. Erring on the side of caution will give you the peace of mind that you need. No matter what happens, remember that no one is entitled to hold you emotional (or any kind of) hostage.

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