The Divorce Course Podcast

When your mediation goes wrong and what to do next in your divorce, custody or property negotiations

11.14.2023 - By Laura & LynPlay

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Are you feeling drained and defeated the aftermath of a failed mediation or family dispute resolution? Listen to this episode to gain essential insights to guide you through the challenges that follow a family law mediation gone wrong. Key Takeaways:         Demolishing Arguments: CIA-Level Investigation Discover the importance of scrutinising your ex-partner's arguments post-mediation. Lynette reveals her method of creating a list of objections and systematically demolishing them with solid evidence. Offer Tactics: Leveraging Section 117C Delve into the world of post-mediation offers. Learn about crafting a compelling offer under Section 117C with your lawyer and strategically using it to your advantage. Ratcheting Towards Resolution: A Step-by-Step Approach Learn about the ratchet approach—locking in agreements on smaller issues before progressing, ensuring tangible progress and minimising the risk of endless circling. Children and Property Negotiations: Juggling Two at Once Gain insights into whether it's practical to address children and property matters simultaneously in mediation, considering the nuances of each case. Empower Yourself: Bolster Your Case with Evidence: Lynette emphasises the importance of gathering evidence to support your claims, offering examples of creative ways to prove your position. Stay Resilient Against Narcissistic Tactics: Strategies for dealing with narcissistic ex-partners who thrive on dragging out the process. Decode the Nights' Dilemma: let us shed light on the unspoken cues lawyers often use and offers a candid perspective on what judges may think. Please remember that this podcast offers general education and is not a substitute for legal advice. Always seek independent legal counsel, as each situation is unique. Don’t miss out on hearing the answers to the following questions What if they won't sign anything during mediation? Is it advisable to bring up concerns about the mediation process if it's not working? Can a mediator help narrow down the issues that need to be decided in court? Should children's and property matters be dealt with in the same mediation session? How does a mediator handle cases where both parents want equal time with the children? Is it common for people to focus on children first in mediation, and is it related to financial considerations? How do judges view claims of spending time with children, especially when it's seemingly motivated by financial considerations? Is there a way to address the issue when someone appears to be using children for financial gain in court? How can you prevent a situation where an agreement reached in mediation is later changed by one party? What steps can be taken to stop a change of mind after reaching a settlement in mediation? How can you deal with the emotional aspect of a failed mediation, especially if you feel like you've failed? What should you do if you feel pressured or bullied during mediation? How can you handle an avoidant person in mediation, and what steps can be taken afterward? Is it common for people to feel like a failure after a failed mediation, and how can they overcome that feeling? What is the significance of the 117C reference in the context of mediation? How do you handle a failed mediation with an amicable person? How do you deal with high-conflict personalities in mediation? Is it worth it to give in to certain demands from a high-conflict person to reach an agreement? How does the emotional aspect differ in children's mediation compared to property mediation? Are there specific challenges or considerations in children's mediation that people should be aware of? How do people's mindsets change when it comes to negotiating child custody arrangements in mediation? Is there a change in mindset with the presumption of equal shared care, and how is the law evolving in this regard? What are the potential consequences if a mediation process goes awry? In the aftermath of a failed mediation, how can individuals cope with the investment of time, money, and emotion without achieving a resolution?   What is the process of creating and dismantling a list of arguments following a mediation that didn't succeed? What defines a calderbank offer under Section 117C, and what strategic advantages does it provide? What risks does the opposing party face if they reject an offer made under Section 117C? Following an unsuccessful mediation, what methods can be employed to gather evidence to strengthen one's case? Could you provide an example of successfully obtaining proof to counter an argument raised during mediation? What steps can be taken if the other party refuses to sign the agreement at the conclusion of a seemingly successful negotiation? In what ways can gathered evidence be instrumental in supporting one's case and undermining the claims of the opposing party? How is the ratchet approach applied in mediation, and what role does it play in reaching resolutions? Can you explain the importance of locking in agreements on smaller issues before progressing towards more significant matters in mediation? Is it possible to address children and property matters simultaneously in mediation, and what challenges may arise? What factors typically come into play when negotiating arrangements related to both children and property? How should individuals navigate dealings with narcissistic ex-partners, especially if they initially seemed agreeable but later retract their consent? What are some unspoken cues often utilised by lawyers during discussions on children's nights and custody arrangements? From a judicial perspective, how are discussions about the number of nights a child spends with each parent perceived? How can individuals empower themselves and strengthen their case with evidence in the aftermath of a mediation? What strategies can be employed to maintain resilience in the face of tactics employed by narcissistic ex-partners? How does the distribution of nights a child spends with each parent impact the factors outlined in Section 75 of family law?   Useful Resources: Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR FREE DISCLOSURE CHECKLIST GUIDE Click here for our free before you leave checklist  Click here for our free mediation checklist Sign up here for our next free online webinar Waitlist for our self represent in the family court course   Episodes Mentioned in this episode  Can you really mediate with a narcissist? Mediation and negotiation tips for divorcing an ex with narcissistic behaviours   Convincing the unconvincible in divorce negotiations for family law   Costs, Family Court and Calderbank Offers   The court conveyer belt: for family law, divorce, property settlement and children matters    Emergency Contacts: WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE  LEGAL AID Lifeline 13 11 14 Mensline Australia 1300 789 978 Kids Help Line 1800 551 800 Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123 Relationships Australia  Police on 000 DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636 National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732 Don't forget to hit SUBSCRIBE so you don't miss out on our upcoming practical steps and guidance for your divorce or de facto separation. If you found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review to help others. Thank you.   Please note that this podcast provides general education only and is not legal advice. Always seek independent legal advice, as every situation is different.  

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