Episode 123: The Lindsay Clancy Case: Why So Many Women Are Drowning in Silence 💔 Is the pressure to hold everything together leaving you completely exhausted? If you are a deeply sensitive, high-functioning, or neurodivergent woman carrying the weight of a marriage that looks "good" on the outside while drowning on the inside, this raw, unscripted episode is for you.

Today, I’m opening up about a deep, intuitive download that poured out of me after processing the collective grief, rage, and visceral reaction so many of us felt watching the Lindsay Clancy trial unfold.

Inside this episode, we’re unpacking:

• 🛑 The Lindsay Clancy Case & Female Psyche: Why this tragedy hit such an unspoken nerve for women who recognize the terrifying reality of drowning without a safe harbor.
• ⚡ Women as "Shock Absorbers": How we burn out trying to absorb the friction of failed systems, patriarchal expectations, and emotionally disconnected marriages.
• 🌿 Somatic Healing & CPTSD: A personal walk-through of a recent trauma flashback I experienced, how my nervous system released it, and what true safety feels like.
• ❤️‍🩹 Reframing Survival Tactics: Why affairs, overworking, or self-medicating aren't moral failings—they're desperate body responses to a lack of support.
• ✨ Reclaiming Your Humanity: How to stop sacrificing your soul on the altar of keeping everyone else happy, and start building a life where you are genuinely held.

You are not crazy, you are not broken, and you were never meant to carry this heavy load all by yourself. Take a deep breath, soft shoulders, and let's dive in together. 💗

Show Notes: 

Jenna's Instagram Post

Apple - What Every Woman Deserves to Know with Quinn Otrera

Spotify - What Every Woman Deserves to Know with Quinn Otrera

Apple - Why Men Get to Succeed and Women Get Exhausted with Quinn Otrera

Spotify - Why Men Get to Succeed and Women Get Exhausted with Quinn Otrera

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Episode 122: Somatic trauma release and nervous system healing with guest Jennica Mills. 🌿✨

Hey friend, welcome back! Today, we are taking a deep breath and dropping straight into something that every single woman considering divorce needs to hear. I am beyond thrilled to sit down with the incredible Jennica Mills—a somatic educator with over 22 years of experience in trauma release, sexual wellness, and embodiment work.

If you’ve ever felt like you’ve completely lost yourself while trying to keep the peace, overfunctioning, or trying to manage everyone else’s emotions around you… this conversation is going to feel like a warm hug and a massive breakthrough all at once. ❤️

Jennica and I dive into:

• Why "calm" isn't the ultimate goal: Moving past standard nervous system regulation into true responsiveness 🌊
• Interoception & Neurosception: How to tune back into your body's wisdom so you can finally know your true "yes" and "no" 🔍
• The "Myopic Mirror": Why you might feel a deep conflict between who everyone else expects you to be and who your soul actually is ✨
• Orienting & Grounding: Why we have to build safety and capacity in the body before diving into deep trauma work 🌳

It is time to give your body permission to step out of survival mode and into full-on intimacy with your life. Grab a tea, get comfortable, and let's drop in together! 🎧👇

Want to join Jennica live inside our Stay or Go Community? 💖 She is coming into the community for two powerful workshops on Orienting and Grounding!

📱 Text "stayorgo community" to 33777 to get onboarded so you don't miss out on dropping in with us live!

Show Notes:

Jennica's Website

Jennica's Instagram

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Episode 121: How to Have the Breakup Conversation When You Fear Conflict 💔

Having the breakup conversation with your spouse can feel utterly overwhelming, especially if you hate conflict or worry about how they’ll react. If you’ve been holding back your decision to leave simply because you’re terrified of bringing it up, take a deep breath. You are not alone, and you don’t have to navigate this dysregulating moment without a roadmap. 

In this episode, I’m digging deep into what it actually takes to prepare for the separation or divorce talk. We’re moving beyond just finding the "perfect words" to focus on what matters most: your safety, your emotional grounding, and setting firm boundaries.

Here is what we dive into together:

• 📋 Pre-Conversation Prep: How sorting out your logistics and knowing your rights beforehand gives you a grounded foundation.
• 🔄 The Reality of EIPs: Why this conversation might not be "one and done" if you are married to an emotionally immature partner.
• 💔 Grieving the Outcome: Accepting that no combination of words will magically make an emotionally volatile partner react calmly.
• 🗣️ The Nonviolent Communication (NVC) Framework: A simple 4-step script to state your boundaries clearly without getting pulled into emotional manipulation or drama.

Remember, my love: you don’t need your partner’s permission or agreement to choose yourself. Tune in, take a slow breath, and let’s walk through this together. 🤍

Next Steps & Resources Mentioned:

• 🎙️ Episode 106 Apple: When Husbands Don't Lose Their Shit During Divorce
• 🎙️ Episode 106 Spotify: When Husbands Don't Lose Their Shit During Divorce
• 🎙️ Episodes 110 Apple: What Every Woman Deserves to Know (with Quinn)
• 🎙️ Episodes 110 Spotify: What Every Woman Deserves to Know (with Quinn)
• 🎙️ Episode 111 Apple: Why Men Get to Succeed and Women Get Exhausted (with Quinn)
• 🎙️ Episode 111 Spotify: Why Men Get to Succeed and Women Get Exhausted (with Quinn)
• 🎙️ Episode 85 Apple: Stop the Narcissist Hunt: Focus on How YOU Feel Instead
• 🎙️ Episode 85 Spotify: Stop the Narcissist Hunt: Focus on How YOU Feel Instead
• Unpaid labor Reel
• 📚 Recommended Reading: Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People by Lindsay Gibson
• 💬 Get 1-on-1 Support: Need a tailor-made roadmap for your unique situation? Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-minute coaching session with me.
• 👯‍♀️ Join the Community: Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to connect with women who truly get it!

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Episode 120: Reclaim your authority and trust your intuition when considering divorce.

This episode is a banger, and I am speaking straight from the heart (and a little bit of fire 🔥).

If you’ve been feeling stuck, exhausted, or constantly doubting your own reality, I want to land one fundamental truth in your heart today: In a world designed by and for men, trusting your own mind and body is a radically necessary act of self-preservation. 💡

In this episode, I’m opening up about a personal health scare with perimenopause and how easily even I caught myself outsourcing my authority to external "experts" who told me my symptoms weren't real. 🛑 We dig into how we as women, especially those considering divorce or coming out of fundamentalist religious environments, have been systematically programmed to believe someone else out there knows better than we do.

Here’s what we’re breaking down together:

• 🛑 Reclaiming Your "Motherfucking No": Why ignoring your body’s signals is keeping you stuck—and how to start trusting your burnout, your boundaries, and your intuition over someone else’s comfort.
• 💔 The "Good Guy" Trap: How subtle manipulation, emotional hijacking, and patriarchal rules teach us to make our unhappiness a "me problem" instead of seeing the system for what it is.
• 🚪 No One Is Coming to Save You: Accepting that while no knight in shining armor is showing up to fix your marriage, you hold the steering wheel—and you don't have to drive alone.
• 📣 A Word to My Male Listeners: Why patriarchal systems exploit you, too, and why reclaiming individual agency is a civic and human imperative.

You hold more authority than you think, babe. It’s time to take it back. 💪✨

🔗 Resources & Links Mentioned in This Episode:

• Join the Stay or Go Community: Text STAYORGO to 33777 to surround yourself with women who have your back. 👯‍♀️
• Book a 90-Minute Strategy Session: Text 90MIN to 33777 to start doing the deep one-on-one work. 🗝️
• Recommended Episodes: Go back and check out my deep dive into Gerda Lerner's The Creation of Patriarchy and The Creation of Feminist Consciousness. 📚
• Episode 110: What Every Woman Deserves to Know with Quinn Otrera
• Episode 111: Why Men Get to Succeed and Women Get Exhausted with Quinn Otrera
• "The Men Are Not All Right"...Right? - Diabolical Lies
• Invisible Women - Caroline Criado Perez

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Episode 119: Nervous System Regulation for Divorce & Decision Making: Why You’re Not Broken

Are you feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or trapped in your marriage and wondering why you can’t make a clear decision? In this episode of the Stay or Go Podcast, I dive deep into why your nervous system regulation is the ultimate key to moving from survival mode into steady clarity. If you've been judging yourself for feeling paralyzed, take a deep breath, you are not broken. Your body is just asking for physical safety before it can process life-altering choices.

In this episode, we cover:

• 🧠 The Science of Your Autonomic Nervous System: A simple, approachable breakdown of the sympathetic "accelerator," parasympathetic "brake," and how they control your stress response.
• 🛑 Why You Can’t "Power Through" Dysregulation: How survival mode keeps you trapped in immediate escapes (like buffering, scrolling, or overworking) instead of long-term clarity.
• 🛠️ Real-World Somatic Tools: Simple, accessible practices you can use right now to ground yourself - including EFT tapping, fascia release, and muscle resets.
• 🎨 Exciting Community Updates: I share the launch of the new Gorgeous Alter Ego Design Workbook (co-created with Quinn Otrera and Jess Jox) on Substack, plus the story behind the podcast’s brand-new logo!

Links & Resources Mentioned:

• ✨ Get the Alter Ego Workbook: Join my paid Substack for just $11/month to snag the new workbook, access the Conscious Mind Mini-Course, and join our monthly live Q&As!
• 👯‍♀️ Join the Stay or Go Community: Ready to stabilize your nervous system alongside an incredible group of women? Text StayOrGoCommunity (all one word) to 33377 to get instant access to all our calls, workshops, and 2026 content.
• 💌 Work With Britta 1-on-1: Want personalized, deep-dive coaching to clear the fog and move forward? Check out my private coaching containers linked here and below.
•  Human Garage (Fascia Work)
• Episode 118 - EFT tapping and resources linked
• Episode 118 Apple - EFT tapping and resources linked
• Episode 109 - Apple
• Episode 109 - Spotify
• Episode 113 - Spotify
• Episode 113 - Apple

Drop your shoulders away from your ears, place a hand on your heart, and let’s dive in together. Sending you so much love and steady ground! 🤍

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Episode 118: EFT Tapping for Nervous System Regulation & Somatic Healing with Jess Johnson 

Ever feel like your mind knows you’re safe, but your body is still completely hijacked by anxiety, rage, or overthinking? 🤯 Babes, you are not crazy—and you definitely cannot "think" your way out of a body-level stress response!

In today’s episode, I am freaking out with excitement because I’m joined by the incredible Jess Johnson, a former trauma therapist turned mind-body connection coach. Jess uses evidence-based EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique/Tapping) to help high achievers, leaders, and women like us drop the self-doubt, stop tying our self-worth to productivity, and get our bodies actually on board with our healing. 🧠✨

We get super real, raw, and explicit about:

• 🕷️ The Science of Tapping: How two rounds of EFT literally cured Jess’s severe, life-disrupting arachnophobia.
• 🧠 Mansplaining Your Inner Child: Why forced positive affirmations don't work until you give your true feelings a voice first.
• 💥 Body vs. Mind Disconnect: What’s really happening when your emotional reaction doesn’t match the situation in front of you.
• 🩺 Perimenopause, Rage, & Medical Gaslighting: Jess’s honest journey through physical burnout, finding the right support, and using EFT as "emotional Drain-o."
• 🖐️ A Step-by-Step Tapping Guide: A mini-walkthrough of the exact EFT points so you can start getting instant somatic relief today!

Whether you’re dealing with CPTSD emotional flashbacks, burnout, or making tough life transitions, this episode is full of science-meets-soul wisdom, zero-BS tools, and plenty of laughs. Pop in those earbuds and let's get into it! 🎙️✨

🌟 Resources & Connect with Us:

Join the Stay or Go Community: Text StayorGocommunity (all one word) to 33777 to get in ASAP for our upcoming live nervous system regulation workshops! 

Jess’s Fun Side-Hustle: Don't forget to listen to her hilarious smutty book podcast, Between the Folds! 😉 

Jess's Website: www.jessjohnsoncoaching.com

Jess's Instagram: @jess.johnsoncoaching

Get Jess's Free Basic EFT Workbook — Sign up for Jess's email list to instantly receive her step-by-step workbook to help you use EFT for your daily goals and nervous system regulation!

Check out Jess Johnson's YouTube Channel for guided EFT videos, including:

• Tapping Meditations:
  • 📽️ WTF is EFT? (Playlist) — A great, beginner-friendly starting point!
  • 📽️ I Choose Courage
  • 📽️ EFT for Self-Trust
• Personal "Tapping in the Wild" Sessions:
  • Husband Fuckery Recovery
  • Processing Medical Anxiety
  • Afghanistan Crisis Tapping

The Science of Tapping by Dr. Peta Stapleton 

TEDx Talk: Is Therapy Facing a Revolution? by Dr. Peta Stapleton

EFT vs. EMDR Comparative Studies: Explore the latest clinical research comparing EFT and EMDR side-by-side at Evidence-Based EFT Comparative Studies.

Brad Yates YouTube Channel — High-yield, approachable tapping videos from one of the pioneers in the EFT space! 

Support the show

The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive

Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨

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Episode 117: Why Love Alone Can’t Save Your Marriage (And Leaving a "Good Guy" with Deep Wounds)

Hi there, love. Place a hand on your heart and take a deep breath with me. 🤍

In today’s deeply personal episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on a recent, heavy experience that brought up a truth many women in our community struggle with: Why love alone cannot save a relationship, especially when you are considering divorcing a "good guy" who carries deep, unhealed wounds. 💔

After learning about the tragic passing of an ex-partner, I found myself revisiting the old scabs of a relationship filled with profound love, chemistry, and connection—but one where we were ultimately both drowning. 🌊 If you’ve ever found yourself wishing he would just cheat or do something terrible so you’d have a "clear line" to leave, I want you to know: You are not alone, and you are not crazy. Often, your empathy becomes the very cage that keeps you trapped in self-abandonment.

In this episode, we unpack:

• 🕊️ The "Healing Fantasy": How childhood attachment wounds make us fall in love with potential instead of staying grounded in current reality.
• 🧮 The "Compatibility Math": A neutral, shame-free framework to evaluate variables like childhood trauma, addiction, neurodiversity, and capacity.
• ⚓ Drowning vs. Anchoring: Why two codependent, insecurely attached partners can’t pull each other to safety without a life raft.
• ✨ Hope for Secure Attachment: How choosing yourself isn't selfish—it's the gateway to true, securely attached love (and why it's waiting for you on the other side).

Loving someone doesn't mean you have to sacrifice your mental health, your peace, or your life purpose to keep them afloat. Let’s talk about how to look at the "math" of your relationship with radically honest, loving eyes. 🌿

Ready to Get Clarity on Your Next Step?

• 🕊️ Book a 90-Minute Clarity Drop-In Session: A focused, ground-level deep dive to map out your history, your relationship dynamic, and your immediate roadmap forward.
• ✨ Apply for 1:1 Deep Dive Coaching (3 Months): High-touch, intimate support for women navigating the entire process of deciding whether to stay or go.

Show Notes:

Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson 

Episode 113 Apple: Why You Don't Trust Yourself When It Comes to Divorce (Exploring Mother Hunger & implicit memory) 

Episode 113 Spotify: Why You Don't Trust Yourself When It Comes to Divorce (Exploring Mother Hunger & implicit memory) 

Episode 12 Apple: Attachment Theory & Its Hidden Impacts on Your Marriage

Episode 12 Spotify: Attachment Theory & Its Hidden Impacts on Your Marriage

If this episode touched your heart, please pass it along to a sister who needs to hear it today. Sending you so much love! 💖

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Episode 116: Reinvent Yourself After Divorce: How to Build Your Alter Ego with Quinn Otrera💫

Welcome back, babes! If you’ve been feeling a little stuck, overwhelmed, or like you’re experiencing an identity collapse while navigating marriage decisions or post-divorce life—this episode was made for you. 

This week, I’m joined by the incredible Quinn Otrera, and she is bringing a tool to the podcast that blew my mind: The Alter Ego Effect (inspired by Todd Herman’s work!).

We dig deep into what happens to our sense of self when the old roles we used to play—like "wife," "Mormon mom," or "trad wife"—no longer fit. Instead of staying stuck in fear, low-grade anxiety, or the story that you’re just a "sad single mom," Quinn shares how stepping into a future-focused alter ego can completely shift your energy, your boundaries, and your nervous system.

In this episode, we talk about:

✨ What identity collapse really is—and why it’s a natural part of divorce.

✨ How famous icons (like Beyoncé and Kobe Bryant) used alter egos to break through fear.

✨ Shifting your physiology and story so you feel safe, confident, and magnetic now.

✨ Quinn’s hilarious and empowering dating stories (and how she stepped into her ultimate power stance).

✨ Practical, "tiny habit" tools to step out of the heavy slog and make rebuilding your life fun and playful again!

Whether you’re considering divorce, right in the thick of it, or rebuilding on the other side, this conversation is an invitation to play, dream, and choose who you want to be next.

(And P.S., I know I mention Quinn's worksheet dropping this week in the episode, but I’ve decided to slow down and pour some extra design love into making it a full mini-workbook for Substack in a couple of weeks!) 🎨✨

👉 Bonus for Substack Subscribers: Quinn has graciously allowed us to share her custom Alter Ego Worksheet! Head over to the paid Substack subscribers area using the link above to get your hands on it as soon as it drops in a couple weeks.

Let's step into our bold, vibrant selves together! Click play and let's dive in. 🎙️🔥

Links & Resources Mentioned:

• Substack: Grab the exclusive Alter Ego Worksheet in our paid subscriber section soon! 
• Design Inspiration: Check out the amazing work by Jess Jaques - Instagram
• Jess Jacques - The Passive Rebel
• Join the Stay or Go Community: Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to connect with us, get tarot readings with Quinn, and find your tribe. ✨

Books Mentioned: 

• The Alter Ego Effect by Todd Herman
• Be Your Future Self Now by Dr. Benjamin Hardy
• Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg.

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Episode 115: Mismatched sex drives in marriage? Let’s talk about reclaiming your erotic blueprint, shedding the shame, and owning your desire. 

Welcome back, y'all! Hello, hello. Today, we are diving headfirst into one of my absolute favorite topics on the planet—one that is so often swept under the rug, especially when we’re trying to decide whether to stay or go. We are talking about sex drives, intimacy, and eroticism. 🌶️

I almost titled this episode "So You're Kinky AF, but Your Spouse Isn't—What to Do," but my marketing friends reminded me that we need to keep things SEO-friendly! But babes, that is exactly the heart of what we are unpacking today.

For so many of us—especially those raised with heavy religious repression (hello, Mormonism! 👋)—sexuality is something we’ve been taught to control, hide, or ignore. But after my own divorce, diving into my eroticism became one of the richest, most beautiful landscapes for discovering who I actually am.

In this episode, we are digging deep into:

• Your Erotic Blueprint 🗺️: Drawing wisdom from Jack Morin’s incredible book, The Erotic Mind, we explore how our unique turn-ons and turn-offs are shaped by our histories, our traumas, and our cultures.
• The Danger of Repression 🚪: Why shoving your desires into a dark closet actually makes you more likely to cause harm to yourself and others (and why owning your kinks makes them your bitch!).
• Mismatched Desires in Marriage ⚖️: How to evaluate if you and your spouse can actually build an intimate playground together using Emily Naguski’s Come Together framework.
• The Power of Self-Touch 💖: Why reclaiming your pleasure by yourself is the safest, most empowering place to start healing, resetting your nervous system, and stepping into your adult autonomy.

Whether you feel like "too much" or you’ve completely shut down your desire to survive a sexless marriage, please hear me: Your eroticism is the very energy of life itself. You cannot cut it off without cutting off your own growth.

If this episode sparks a hunger in you to dive deeper into your own marriage dynamic, I would love to hold space for you. Grab a 90-Minute Session with me, or text "Stay or Go Community" to 33777 to join our radically supportive, pleasure-positive sisterhood. 👭✨

Let's stop letting our pleasure be an afterthought, babes. You deserve to run wild.

So much love, 

Britta xoxo

Show Notes:

The Erotic Mind by Jack Morin

Come Together: The Science and Art of Creating Lasting Sexual Connection by Emily Naguski

Come As You Are by Emily Naguski

Apple: Episode 97: Fate vs. Destiny

Spotify: Episode 97: Fate vs. Destiny

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Episode 114: What happens when your life looks absolutely perfect on the outside, but on the inside, you are completely starving for a deeper, more authentic connection?

This week, I am sitting down with my client turned dear friend, LeeAnna, for a deeply vulnerable, unfiltered conversation about what it actually looks like to face a divorce after 28 years of marriage while grappling with childhood trauma and insecure attachment.

LeeAnna opens up about the painful reality of leaving a marriage that wasn’t inherently "bad" or abusive, but was plagued by a low-level, insidious emotional neglect. From navigating the deep shame of an affair to the heartbreak of letting go of her award-winning dream home, LeeAnna shares how she stopped hyper-functioning to avoid her pain and finally learned how to sit in the "stew" of her reality to choose herself.

If you are a type-A perfectionist who has spent your life collecting quantities (years of marriage, money, status) instead of focusing on emotional quality, this episode is a permission slip to embrace the messy transition and reclaim your autonomy.

In this episode, we explore:

• The "Gilded Cage" Dilemma: Choosing the truth of the inside over the beautiful, perfect image on the outside.
• Insecure Attachment & CPTSD: Recognizing emotional flashbacks and breaking the cycle of dissociation in your relationships.
• The Chemistry of "Parts Work": How integrating your dark, traumatized, and acting-out parts allows you to show up as a whole adult.
• The Reality of Leaving with Love: Why setting boundaries and choosing divorce can be the ultimate act of kindness for both partners.
• Life On the Other Side: How LeeAnna rapidly built a massive, authentic life—including a new home, a classical Pilates studio, a trauma-informed podcast, and a deeply attuned new partnership—in just a few short months

Show Notes:

Connect with LeeAnna: Vocavo Health (Find LeeAnna inside our community guiding Pilates sessions for our Strong Ground theme!)

Law Firm Recommendation (Dallas/Texas)

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