Even if it wasn’t such a relief for overworked dads and moms, it’d hurt a little to think about how much our kids love their grandparents. It almost seems like they prefer grandma and grandpa sometimes, don’t they?

Why is that?

It’s pretty simple. Because grandparents have outgrown most of their baggage. They have let go. Even a lot of grandparents who were demanding and exacting parents seem to finally settle into themselves and manage to be exactly what the generation once removed needs. And kids can sense this: Grandma loves me for me. She’s so nice all the time. Grandpa just wants to hang out. He doesn’t try to make me do anything. He doesn’t boss me around or correct me, he just listens.

Of course, this isn’t universally true...there are lots of bad grandparents out there. But what makes the great ones great is that they’re present, accepting, and proud. Traits that are unfortunately easy to lose sight of as busy, stressed out, and well-meaning parents.

Which makes it a decent test to consider when we get really worked up or worried or upset with our kids: How would a grandparent think about this? What if I wasn’t such a dad about this? Would that make things better?

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