Language of Love with Dr. Laura Berman

Why You Need to Befriend Your Shadow Side


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Today on “The Language of Love,” I am doing a “Bites” episode! These are my quick, informative little episodes that I created for those times when you don’t have time to listen to a whole podcast but you need a little boost and inspiration during your day.

For this “Bite,” I am talking about something that I think is so, so important: Befriending your own shadow. All of us have a shadow. And this shadow doesn’t have to be a negative thing. Our darkness is what can help us to reveal our light. Our wounds can be our way of healing the world.

But if we aren’t aware of our shadows, if we don’t embrace and befriend our shadow sides, guess what happens? That shadow side is what drives the bus. As they say in recovery, ‘our secrets keep us sick,’ but I would take that one step further and say it’s the secrets we keep from ourselves that keep us sick. If there are parts of you that you find shameful or unlovable, and you try to hide them away and ignore them, that only gives them more power. That gives your shadow side an insidious environment of shame and fear in which to grow.

When we befriend our shadow side, we take back some of its power. We put our whole selves back in the driver’s seat, instead of letting fear and shame drive the bus. But, that being said, befriending your shadow side is not just about taking back control. I truly believe our shadows are here to serve us. I know this might be difficult to accept or even consider, but if you look deeply within and ask yourself how that shadow side has served you in your life, you might be shocked to see that there was a true purpose and even a protective energy in this shadow side.

Listen to this “Bite” to get my take on how we can begin to befriend our shadow and why it is so important to do so!

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Language of Love with Dr. Laura BermanBy The Language of Love

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