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117: *26 Practical things* to heal anxious attachment & become securely attached (in 2026)
If you’re still anxiously attached…
If you still overthink texts
If silence feels like danger
If you’re tired of feeling “too much” or not enough
This episode is for YOU.
In this podcast, I share 26 practical, real-life things you can start doing in 2026 to finally heal anxious attachment and become SECURELY ATTACHED not just in love, but in life.
Because this work doesn’t just change your relationships.
It changes your ANXIETY, your MENTAL HEALTH, your BODY, your CAREER, your SELF-ESTEEM
I was anxiously attached for 30+ years.
And becoming secure changed EVERYTHING for me.
Not just how I love.
But how I breathe.
How I sleep.
How I show up
How safe I feel inside myself.
Whether you’re in your 20s, 30s, or 40s —
This is some of the most IMPORTANT WORK you’ll ever do.
Because what’s the point of:
➞ money
➞ holidays
➞ birthdays
➞ success
➞ relationships
…if you feel anxious, insecure, and disconnected from yourself inside? 🚩
In this episode, you’ll learn how to:
★ Stop outsourcing your safety to a partner
★ Calm your nervous system (for REAL)
★ Self-soothe instead of spiraling
★ Set boundaries through ACTION, not begging 🚦
★ Stop overgiving + start receiving 🤍
★ Sit in discomfort without panicking
★ Heal old wounds instead of reliving them
★ Become your OWN source of security 🔒
This is not theory.
This is PRACTICAL.
This is DOABLE.
This is LIFE-CHANGING. 🦸🏼♀️✨
🎧 Grab a pen.
📓 Take notes.
🫂 Be gentle with yourself.
Your younger YOU deserves this.
Your future YOU is counting on you. 💎🫶
💌 Want my support?
You can reach out via email to check if I currently have 1:1 coaching spots available.
I coach via WhatsApp or 1:1 video calls. 🛎✨
Sending you a secure, calm, empowered 2026
Where you STOP proving.
STOP shrinking.
And START choosing YOU.
Love,
Jula
👇 RESOURCES 👇
💎 Courses
✨ Stop FINALLY Obsessing Over Texts
➞ https://www.julanoelle.com/textanxiety
💛 Free Stuff – 30+ resources
Free Attachment Library + more offers
➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop
CHAPTERS:
00:00 Introduction to Anxious Attachment and Healing
03:19 00 Delay Caffeine when you wake up
05:09 01 Check if you’re really anxiously attached
06:00 02 Define what “securely attached” means for YOU
10:02 03 Identify your most impactful areas to work on
11:35 04 Shift focus from your partner to YOU
12:57 05 Have a backup plan ready
15:30 06 Learn to self-soothe
18:03 07 Self-soothe through physical touch
19:01 08 Acts of service for yourself
20:04 09 Gifts for yourself
20:57 10 Learn to RECEIVE
22:54 11 Be consistent
23:34 12 Focus on what you can control
24:47 13 Identify core needs vs. anxious rules
26:39 14 Boundaries through action, not words
28:53 15 Reassure yourself first
29:28 16 Stop bullying yourself
30:16 17 Remove triggers & surround yourself with secure energy
31:14 18 Envision your secure self every morning
32:25 19 Name your emotions out loud
33:32 20 Do body scans
35:11 21 Pause before reactive behavior
36:15 22 Identify your real fears
37:55 23 Recognize triggers from your past
39:28 24 Prioritize YOU
40:28 25 Learn to sit in discomfort
41:54 26 Talk to your younger self
DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor.
This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions.
This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.
Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.
View all episodes
By Jula - The Anxious To Secure Coach
3.7
33 ratings
If you’re still anxiously attached…
If you still overthink texts
If silence feels like danger
If you’re tired of feeling “too much” or not enough
This episode is for YOU.
In this podcast, I share 26 practical, real-life things you can start doing in 2026 to finally heal anxious attachment and become SECURELY ATTACHED not just in love, but in life.
Because this work doesn’t just change your relationships.
It changes your ANXIETY, your MENTAL HEALTH, your BODY, your CAREER, your SELF-ESTEEM
I was anxiously attached for 30+ years.
And becoming secure changed EVERYTHING for me.
Not just how I love.
But how I breathe.
How I sleep.
How I show up
How safe I feel inside myself.
Whether you’re in your 20s, 30s, or 40s —
This is some of the most IMPORTANT WORK you’ll ever do.
Because what’s the point of:
➞ money
➞ holidays
➞ birthdays
➞ success
➞ relationships
…if you feel anxious, insecure, and disconnected from yourself inside? 🚩
In this episode, you’ll learn how to:
★ Stop outsourcing your safety to a partner
★ Calm your nervous system (for REAL)
★ Self-soothe instead of spiraling
★ Set boundaries through ACTION, not begging 🚦
★ Stop overgiving + start receiving 🤍
★ Sit in discomfort without panicking
★ Heal old wounds instead of reliving them
★ Become your OWN source of security 🔒
This is not theory.
This is PRACTICAL.
This is DOABLE.
This is LIFE-CHANGING. 🦸🏼♀️✨
🎧 Grab a pen.
📓 Take notes.
🫂 Be gentle with yourself.
Your younger YOU deserves this.
Your future YOU is counting on you. 💎🫶
💌 Want my support?
You can reach out via email to check if I currently have 1:1 coaching spots available.
I coach via WhatsApp or 1:1 video calls. 🛎✨
Sending you a secure, calm, empowered 2026
Where you STOP proving.
STOP shrinking.
And START choosing YOU.
Love,
Jula
👇 RESOURCES 👇
💎 Courses
✨ Stop FINALLY Obsessing Over Texts
➞ https://www.julanoelle.com/textanxiety
💛 Free Stuff – 30+ resources
Free Attachment Library + more offers
➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop
CHAPTERS:
00:00 Introduction to Anxious Attachment and Healing
03:19 00 Delay Caffeine when you wake up
05:09 01 Check if you’re really anxiously attached
06:00 02 Define what “securely attached” means for YOU
10:02 03 Identify your most impactful areas to work on
11:35 04 Shift focus from your partner to YOU
12:57 05 Have a backup plan ready
15:30 06 Learn to self-soothe
18:03 07 Self-soothe through physical touch
19:01 08 Acts of service for yourself
20:04 09 Gifts for yourself
20:57 10 Learn to RECEIVE
22:54 11 Be consistent
23:34 12 Focus on what you can control
24:47 13 Identify core needs vs. anxious rules
26:39 14 Boundaries through action, not words
28:53 15 Reassure yourself first
29:28 16 Stop bullying yourself
30:16 17 Remove triggers & surround yourself with secure energy
31:14 18 Envision your secure self every morning
32:25 19 Name your emotions out loud
33:32 20 Do body scans
35:11 21 Pause before reactive behavior
36:15 22 Identify your real fears
37:55 23 Recognize triggers from your past
39:28 24 Prioritize YOU
40:28 25 Learn to sit in discomfort
41:54 26 Talk to your younger self
DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor.
This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions.
This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.
Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.
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