Parents of estranged adult children may feel – and believe – that estrangement is an emergency requiring immediate action on their part. It's as though they stand to lose their adult child(ren) forever if they don't do something about it right now. No wonder it feels like an emergency!

And if those parents don't know what to do, or if everything they do seems to make matters worse, they can fall into a state of terrible limbo. They become vulnerable to desperation, anxiety, depression, and more.

Not taking immediate action to end estrangement (whatever that would be) does not mean losing your child forever. It's just one example of a trick of the mind called "emotional reasoning."

Emotional reasoning is a cognitive distortion, or mental mistake, that can cause parents more pain than necessary during unwanted estrangement.

In this informative episode, Tina explains the negative impact of emotional reasoning and gives examples she sees in parents she works with. Some of the examples might sound familiar to you. If so, this episode can help you begin to free yourself from the painful prison of emotional reasoning.

For much more information on coping with, and responding effectively to, estrangement by your adult child(ren), read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child.

Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club.

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