In this Ask Steph episode, I’m answering a listener question about infidelity and whether a fearful-avoidant partner can genuinely change.

Rather than asking whether change is possible in theory, this episode focuses on a more important question: how likely is real change, and what should you actually be paying attention to after betrayal?

In this episode, I explore:

• How someone takes responsibility for cheating, and whether their remorse goes beyond guilt or shame.
• Why understanding why the cheating happened matters more than promises alone.
• How fearful-avoidant patterns and unresolved shame can drive self-sabotage.
• What it takes to rebuild trust, including the capacity to stay present with your pain rather than rushing to move on.
• When repair after infidelity can lead to growth — and when the conditions for real repair may not be there.

If you’re navigating betrayal, I’m really sorry you’re going through that. I hope this episode helps you clarify what to look for and whether meaningful repair is possible.