Securely Attached

322. Navigating divorce or separation through a family systems approach: Preventative steps to reduce the risk of insecure attachment with Una Archer

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Una Archer joins me for a thoughtful conversation about how to help children feel safe, secure, and resilient in the face of their parents' separation or divorce.

 

Together we explore:

 

  • Why there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to separation, even among siblings, and why tuning into each child’s unique needs matters.

  • What the Circle of Security framework is and how it can be used to support children’s attachment during major family transitions.

  • The three core emotional needs that children rely on to feel secure, and how parents can meet these needs in everyday moments (check the show notes for a helpful visual!).

  • How to separate your own trauma and fears from your child’s experience so you can truly see and respond to them without projection.

  • Why allowing more time and slowness during transitions isn’t a setback, but an important part of healing and connection.

  • The power of rupture and repair in relationships and practical ways parents can engage in repair after conflict or misunderstanding.

  • How different family structures after separation—sometimes two distinct family systems—can be healthy depending on what your family needs.

  • Navigating the challenges of co-parenting, including managing handoffs and stepping back when it’s not your parenting time.

 

If you’re looking for compassionate, practical guidance on fostering secure attachment for your children through big changes, this conversation is full of insights and tools you won’t want to miss!

 

 

LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:

  • https://www.helpyourchildthrive.co.uk/

  • The Separated Parent's Guide to Attachment: 3 Steps Towards Emotional Security 

 

ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

👉🏻 If you're currently in the midst of separation, moving forward after divorce, or adjusting to life post-split, Upshur Bren Psychology Group's weekly virtual Divorce Process Group for Women provides a safe space for woemen to process their emotions, gain support, and build strategies for moving forward. Visit https://upshurbren.com/group-womensdivorce or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to learn more.

 

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 https://drsarahbren.com/42-busting-divorce-myths-and-breaking-down-the-true-effect-it-has-on-children-a-conversation-with-michelle-dempsey-multack

🎧 277. Q&A: Is “nesting” during a divorce better for your kids?

🎧 280. Codependency, insecure attachment, and relationship patterns: Creating stronger, healthier romantic partnerships with Alana Carvalho

🎧 102. Breaking the cycle of insecure attachment: How to support your child's secure attachment even if you didn't grow up with Dr. Miriam Steele

...more
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Securely AttachedBy Dr. Sarah Bren
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