Rebecca Geshuri, therapist and co-author of the new book When Good Moms Feel Bad joins me to talk about why so many "good moms" still feel overwhelmed, reactive, or stuck in cycles of guilt, anger, and self-criticism.

Together we explore:

- Drawing from Internal Family Systems (IFS) Rebecca breaks down what "parts work" is and how understanding your inner parts can reduce reactivity and shame.

- How polarization between "what my child needs" and "what I need" fuels burnout and emotional overwhelm.

- Why parenting feels hardest when younger, protective parts take over.

- What the "inner mom" is and how learning to access this part of yourself builds calm, confidence, and connection.

- A simple framework to slow down in triggering moments and respond with more compassion.

- How self-compassion and nervous system awareness support secure attachment — for both you and your child.

If you've been feeling overwhelmed and burnt out in parenthood, this episode offers validation, language for what you're experiencing, and practical tools to help you feel more grounded, regulated, and connected.

LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:

🔗 Rebecca Geshuri

🔗 Second Street Collective

📚 When Good Moms Feel Bad: An Empowering Guide for Transforming Guilt, Anxiety, and Anger into Compassion, Confidence, and Connectedness

🎧 Listen to Rebecca's first Securely Attached interview about her approach combining Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy with maternal mental health

LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:

🔗 drsarahbren.com

📱@drsarahbren

ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

🔗 Want to learn more about therapy and coaching resources at Upshur Bren Psychology Group? Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about why specialized mental healthcare providers matter with Rebecca Geshuri and Paige Bellenbaum

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode to help you learn to lighten the load in pregnancy and parenthood with Dr. Sterling

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of mom-rage Diana Winston

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode exploration of healing trauma through presence, connection, and self-awareness with Dr. Jacob Ham

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of energy healing with Stephanie Filardi

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...

- What body doubling actually is and why your child may focus better simply because someone is nearby.

- Why getting started on tasks (homework, getting dressed, chores) is often harder than the task itself for kids with ADHD.

- How to be intentional about helping reduce procrastination, distraction, and emotional overwhelm for your child.

- How to use body doubling in ways that build independence over time, instead of creating power struggles or burnout.

- Real-life, low-effort examples of body doubling that don't require special systems, tutors, or more on your plate.

If your child struggles to get started, loses focus easily, or can only seem to work when someone is sitting with them, this episode offers a strategy to support them in a way that feels sustainable and actually works.

REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

👉🏻 Interested in learning more about Upshur Bren Psychology Group's Parenting Your Child with ADHD 8-week virtual workshop series to empower parents of children, adolescents, and young adults with ADHD? Go to upshurbren.com/group-adhd or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to learn more.

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about with real-life strategies for parenting a child with ADHD with Dr. Eliza Barach

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how can I get my child with ADHD go from one activity to the next without a fight?

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how you can prepare for an IEP or 504 meeting after my child receives an ADHD diagnosis

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how you can help your child utilize school supports without feeling embarrassed or self-conscious

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Dr. W. Thomas Boyce, author of The Orchid and the Dandelion, joins me to talk about why some children are biologically more sensitive to their environments and how that sensitivity can become either a challenge or a powerful strength.

Together we explore:

- What it means to have either an orchid or a dandelion child and why this exists on a spectrum rather than as a strict either-or.

- Why sensitive children often struggle the most in stressful environments and thrive the most in supportive ones.

- How nervous system reactivity and regulation show up differently across kids and what that means for how you parent.

- The difference between sensitivity and fragility and why sensitive kids can be incredibly resilient when the right supports are in place.

- How parents can support orchid children without overprotecting or pushing them too hard.

This episode is designed to help parents better understand their child's sensitivity, feel less afraid of getting it wrong, and walk away with a clearer sense of how to support their child in a way that builds resilience, confidence, and long-term emotional health.

LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:

📚The Orchid and the Dandelion

FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:

📱@theorchidandthedandelion

📱@drsarahbren

ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

👉 Want to get my research-backed framework for increasing cooperation and emotion regulation skills in your sensitive child? Check out Parenting by Design, my guided program to help you parent your unique child in a way that increases cooperation, defuses power struggles, and rebuilds their trust in your authority–all while supporting your child's mental health and your own.

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping "Big Reactors" learn to regulate and manage their intense emotions with Claire Lerner

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting a sensitive, "spicy," highly emotional child

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about temperament and personality with Dr. Koraly Pérez-Edgar

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about preventing burnout when you're the parent of a highly sensitive child

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...

- How to understand what is really happening when a young child becomes intensely frustrated or self critical.

- Why perfectionistic behaviors in early childhood are often developmentally normal and when they may begin to impact confidence or emotional well being.

- What to do in the moment when your child is dysregulated and why reassurance, praise, or growth mindset language often does not land when emotions are running high.

- How staying curious about your child's negative self talk can actually support resilience and self awareness over time.

- Ways to protect your child's inner voice and self esteem without trying to rush her out of uncomfortable feelings.

If your child gets stuck in frustration, takes mistakes personally, or is hard on themself, this episode will help you learn how to support their long term emotional growth.

REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.

ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Self-compassion, critical thinking, and connection: What the research reveals about raising capable kids with Melinda Wenner Moyer

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Secure attachment and growth mindset: The science behind raising well-adjusted kids with Melinda Wenner Moyer

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Helping sensitive kids build self-esteem and get out of a cycle of self-criticism with Dr. Blaise Aguirre

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE) with Dr. Eli Lebowitz

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Somatic practitioner and founder of Circle of Nurture, Lisa Rombach, joins me for a deeply grounding conversation about motherhood, the nervous system, and why mothers need support just as much as the children they care for.

Together, we explore:

- What somatic work actually is, in everyday language, and why it's not as abstract as it may sound.

- How motherhood changes our relationship with our bodies and sense of self.

- Why self-care often falls short and what truly helps mothers feel replenished.

- The role of community, presence, and being witnessed in reducing burnout.

- How being held and supported as a mother quietly shapes how our children feel safe and secure.

This episode will help mothers feel less alone, more understood, and more grounded in their own experience. You don't need to fix yourself or try harder, sometimes the most powerful shift comes from being supported and held.

LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:

🔗 Circle of Nurture

🔗 Register for Lisa's live master class: Mother Glue

🔗 Join the next online Mother's Circle

FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:

📱@circleofnurture

📱@drsarahbren

ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

🔗 Feeling weighed down by mom-guilt, identity shifts, or the mental load of parenting? Upshur Bren Psychology Group specializes in maternal mental health and offers therapy and coaching to help you feel more grounded and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about support options or schedule a free consultation call so we can share recommendations for a personalized plan to meet your unique needs.

🔗 Feldenkrais Method

🔗 Somatic Experiencing (SE™) from Dr. Peter A. Levine

🔗 Kimberly Ann Johnson

🔗 Mother Circle: Mothering through adoption

🔗 Lucy Rowett

🔗 The Mother Circle

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my episode on parental burnout: What it is, why it happens, and how to overcome it

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how tuning into your child's natural rhythms can completely transform the way you understand their emotions and reactions with somatic therapist Alé Duarte

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of energy healing with Stephanie Filardi

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about using Internal Family Systems to emotionally support mothers with Rebecca Geshuri and Jessica Sorci

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

- Whether lying is a normal part of child development or a sign of a deeper issue.

- What kids are actually trying to solve when they lie and how understanding that can change the way we respond as parents.

- How lying can function as a stress response, similar to fight, flight, or freeze, especially for kids with still-developing executive functioning skills.

- Why pushing for confessions, lectures, or punishments often backfires, leading to more power struggles and less honesty — and what to say in the moment instead.

- How to teach honesty over time without making your child feel unsafe bringing you the big stuff later on.

If your child has started lying and you find yourself wondering whether this is "normal," whether you should be worried, or how to handle it without condoning the behavior, this episode will help you respond with more calm, clarity, and confidence.

REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

🗞️ Fight, Flight, Freeze… or Fib?

ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether encouraging imagination will lead to lying in the future

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about getting your child to cooperate without using threats

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about why parenting 6-12 year olds is more important now than ever with Dr. Sheryl Ziegler

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Independent play expert Lizzie Assa is back on Securely Attached to talk about how play is one of the most powerful ways children can build confidence, creativity, frustration tolerance, and resilience (while parents get a little breathing room back too.)

Together we explore:

- What independent play actually looks like for kids of all ages and what is realistic at each stage.

- Why independent play does not just happen, and how parents can teach it without guilt or power struggles.

- How to create simple "play pockets" in your home that make independent play more likely.

- Signs your child may have too many toys and why toy overload can shut play down.

- Specific phrases, routines, and timing cues that make independent play more successful.

- How to decode what your child's play reveals about their emotional experience and where they might need extra support.

- How independent play might look different for only children versus those playing with siblings.

This episode is designed to leave you with specific ideas you can put into practice immediately, from how to set up play to what to say when you step back, so independent play becomes something that actually works in your day-to-day life.

LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:

🔗 The Workspace for Children

🔗 Substack - The Workplace for Children

📚 But I'm Bored!: Discover the Power of Independent Play to Raise Confident, Resilient Kids

🎧 Listen to Lizzie's first interview on the Securely Attached podcast

FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:

📱@theworkspaceforchildren

📱@drsarahbren

ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

👉 Want games specifically designed for fostering emotion regulation? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to get my free guide packed with games you can play with kids of all ages!

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the best toys to encourage independent play

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether fun is the antidote to burnout with Mike Rucker

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode answering if there is a wrong way to encourage independent play

🎧Listen to podcast episode about teaching kids healthy tech habits free of guilt or power struggles with Ash Brandin

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

- Why some children are more sensitive to teasing, how temperament plays a role, and why those kids are often more likely to be targeted by peers.

- How all three hosts, as therapists and parents of sensitive boys, handle teasing and social stress with their own children, including what has helped and what we had to learn the hard way.

- What kids mean when they talk about "rage baiting," how this behavior shows up in friendships, and why it is especially dysregulating for sensitive children.

- Whether a "toughen up" approach ever helps sensitive kids, and what Dr. Sarah learned when her husband's advice to their son worked better than her own.

- How children can learn coping skills for teasing, including when to walk away, when it might be okay to engage, and how to tell the difference.

If your child takes teasing to heart and you worry about how to help without minimizing their feelings, this episode will help you support your sensitive child with more confidence, clarity, and connection.

REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping "Big Reactors" learn to regulate and manage their intense emotions with Claire Lerner

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about raising sensitive, "spicy," or highly emotional children

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about navigating peer rejection in early adolescence

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Author of Indistractable, Nir Eyal, is here to reshape the way we think about attention, willpower, and the forces that pull our minds in a thousand different directions.

Together we explore:

- The surprising science showing that internal triggers (not technology) drive most of our daily distractions.

- How stress, boredom, overwhelm, and discomfort quietly shape our habits (and our kids').

- Nir's simple 4-step framework for becoming "indistractable."

- What parents can do to model healthy tech habits without constant nagging, power struggles, or guilt.

- How to help kids build executive functioning skills like focus, follow-through, and frustration tolerance.

- A scheduling hack families can use to reduce battles and increase connection.

- The small mindset shifts that turn everyday moments of distraction into opportunities for growth.

If you've ever found yourself checking your phone without thinking, losing time to endless tasks, struggling to stay present with your child, or worrying about how screens are affecting your family, this episode offers clarity, practical tools, and a completely new way to approach focus and intentionality — for both you and your kids.

LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:

🔗 Nir Eyal

📚 Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life

📚 Hooked: How to Build Habit-Forming Products

FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA:

📱X: @nireyal & LinkedIn: Nir Eyal

📱IG: @drsarahbren

ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

👉🏻 Are you interested in exploring executive functioning supports? At Upshur Bren Psychology Group we offer a wide range of options, including in-person services for kids who live locally and virtual coaching support for those nationally. SCHEDULE A FREE CALL to learn more about the available resources for your unique needs.

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about teaching kids healthy tech habits free of guilt or power struggles with Ash Brandin

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to be intentional with your tech use with Catherine Price

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the best response to kids who constantly say, "I'm bored"?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

- Why toddlers often get intensely attached to a single outfit and why this kind of rigidity is usually a totally normal part of development.

- How to understand the difference between a sensory preference, a sensory processing challenge, and everyday toddler stubbornness.

- What "system load" is and why kids become more rigid when they are navigating stress, transitions, or big developmental leaps.

- How to reduce morning battles by planning ahead, building flexibility skills, and getting curious about what is really driving your child's resistance.

- What to do on the days when nothing works, including how to ride out meltdowns with less guilt and more grounded presence.

If you are struggling with daily clothing standoffs or wondering whether your child's rigidity means something is wrong, this episode will help you make sense of what is developmentally typical, when to consider sensory support, and how to navigate tough moments with more confidence and clarity.

REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop.

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about understanding your toddler with Devon Kuntzman

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode on how to mindfully parent a threenager

🎧 Listen to my podcast on understanding your child's sensory processing experiences with The OT Butterfly Laura Petix

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode on strengthening your child's distress tolerance

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!