There’s a quiet tension many of us carry as parents of neurodivergent kids: Am I helping my child or am I holding them back? That line between supporting and enabling can feel blurry, emotional, and constantly shifting, especially when executive function challenges are part of the picture.

In this episode, I sit down with parent coach and educator Cindy Goldrich to bring clarity and compassion to that question. Cindy offers a powerful, practical definition that reframes everything: enabling is doing something for someone else without a plan to help them eventually do it themselves. Support, on the other hand, can include stepping in — when it’s intentional, temporary, and part of a bigger skill-building plan.

Through real-life examples, like the familiar “forgotten violin” scenario, we unpack how parents often get labeled as enabling when they’re actually prioritizing, scaffolding, and responding to the child they have in front of them. Cindy reminds us that we can’t fix everything at once, and trying to do so only increases anxiety for both parent and child.

We also dig into how executive function delays, working memory challenges, and developmental lags can masquerade as defiance or irresponsibility. When we understand what’s really happening in the brain, we can shift from judgment to curiosity, and from pressure to problem-solving.

This conversation is an invitation to release guilt, trust your instincts, and give yourself permission to support your child without shame. It’s about parenting with intention, grace, and a long-term vision for independence, one small, thoughtful step at a time.

🎧 Listen in for a grounded, validating conversation that helps you confidently navigate the balance between supporting and enabling.

You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.

Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/340

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