AA Recovery Interviews with Howard L.

Jails, institutions, or death. These are the three bleak outcomes from alcoholism and drug addiction that faced my guest on today’s show, Ro Y. Actually, he fulfilled the first two in his late teens and early twenties after being incarcerated multiple times and being court-ordered into treatment facilities. The third option was not far behind. Ro’s increasing use from alcohol and drugs pointed solely toward a permanent, if not welcome, solution to his misery. His introduction to AA happened in the prison meetings he attended for no other purpose than to attain a less severe period behind bars. Upon release from every jailing, he ignored everything he'd heard in AA and returned to a life of drug use, alcoholism, and crime. Ro’s downhill slide accelerated with each felony conviction for buying and selling drugs. Prison sentences, parole violations, and failed attempts to stop drinking and using dogged his every move. Finallly, in Spring of 1982 when he hit his bottom and entered AA. With an earnestness born out of desperation, Ro finally began the tough work required in the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. Working his way out of the debris field of his life, Ro continued to trudge the road of happy destiny one day at a time. That journey took him from sweeping floors as an ex-con to owning his own business for over 30 years, building and racing cars and boats while setting world speed-records in the process. He has never forgotten where he came from, nor taken for granted God’s gifts of sobriety.

Living a rich and fulfilling life, Ro lives in the center of the AA herd. With 40 years of sobriety, he still attends daily meetings and can be seen talking to newcomers and old-timers alike, offering his unique folksy brand of support and friendship. His AA story is simply remarkable, yet told in very humble terms. I’m grateful for the friendship we’ve enjoyed for the past 30 years and I believe you’ll find today’s episode of AA Recovery Interviews to be especially engaging and meaningful. So, set your phone to Do Not Disturb for the next hour and 15 minutes as you enjoy my conversation with one of my favorite AA kinfolk, Ro Y.

Check out Howard’s Big Book Podcast, the complete unabridged audio version of the First and Second Editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book Podcast is an engaging cover-to-cover, word-for-word reading of all 11 chapters and Personal Stories, many of which were left out of the Third and Fourth Editions. Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Or listen on https://bigbookpodcast.com

[Disclaimer: AA Recovery Interviews podcast strictly adheres to AA’s 12 Traditions and all General Service Office guidelines for safe-guarding anonymity on-line. I pay all podcast production costs. No advertising is allowed. And no one receives financial gain from the show. AA Recovery Interviews and my guests do not speak for or represent AA at-large. This podcast is simply my way of giving back to AA that which has been so freely given to me. -Howard L.]

Imagine trying to get sober in a country without AA meetings or the Big Book. That's what faced Ksenija when she got sober in 1992. That, plus Croatia's viscious War of Independence.

Though she had grown up in a Soviet country that paid little heed to the disease of alcoholism, the rest of Kesenija’s back-story is similar to those told by AA members around the world. She was raised in a culture in which alcohol is part of the social fabric and started drinking her middle teens. Finding enjoyment in the bottle and the behavior that resulted from it, Kesenija lived through her share of abusive relationships, tough marriages, single mothering, and divorce, many of the same things encountered by other AA women I’ve interviewed. Like other ambitious and functional alcoholics, Kesenija still managed to carve out a successful career as a singer and actress in her native Croatia, the U.S., and other countries. Unfortunately, the disease of alcoholism inevitably interceded, prevailed, and destroyed it all. Barely surviving her bottom, Kesenija was providentially led into the AA Program and reliable sobriety. That was 30 years and many achievements ago.

But it was her unique abilities associated with service work that really put a shine on Kesenija’s Program. She actively lobbied for and later volunteered to translate the Big Book and the 12 and 12 into the Croatian language. Such tools were simply not available to the fledgling groups in Croatia, especially before the fall of the Soviet Union. The books completed, and her career restored, Kesenija made it her service mission to travel her country, helping establish and support new and existing AA groups. To say that her service work has kept her sober, humble, and grateful would be an understatement. There are many Croatians who’ve been guided to sobriety by her efforts.

You’re going to enjoy my interview with Keseija. I do beg you to forgive the glitchy audio that Zoom’s connection to Croatia provided that day. But it’s still the content that counts and hers counts a lot. So please welcome to AA Recovery Interviews my friend and AA sister, Kesenija P.

At 94 years old and 44 years sober, Bud's remarkable longevity and long-term sobriety are the perfect backdrop for the story of a life well-lived through the Program of Alcoholics Anonymous. Though he started drinking later than most, his disease quickly branched off an alcoholic family tree that claimed the lives of his father and both sisters. Like many alcoholics, Bud built a successful career despite his growing addiction to alcohol. For a long time, he managed to keep his drinking confined to evenings and weekends with his wife and friends who shared in the glow of his good cheer. But as his drinking escalated, that glow turned into a glare from the harsh reality that he had become an alcoholic. Early attempts at rehab and short stints in AA were minimally effective as he allowed the differences in his drinking life to dominate similarities with other alcoholics. His downhill slide, abetted by more frequent binges and blackouts, culminated in expulsion from his home by his wife. Thoroughly licked by the disease, Bud came all the way in and sat all the way down in AA at the age of 49. He has never left.

Bud’s exceptionally long and illustrious life in sobriety contains all of the elements familiar to recovering alcoholics whose lives have been enriched by AA. His regular attendance at many meetings, combined with non-stop service work that includes sponsoring other men and participating in interventions, have made him indispensable to the groups he serves. His friendly disposition and welcoming spirit make it easy for newcomers and old-timers alike to comfortably join him in the center of the Program. At 94, Bud’s well-seasoned message of hope rings fresh and true on a daily basis. And though the audio quality of this interview was slightly affected by a glitchy Zoom, I believe you’ll find Bud’s story immediately enthralling and quite easy to listen to. So kick back, relax, and please enjoy the next hour of AA Recovery Interviews with my good friend and AA brother, Bud S.

Check out Howard’s Big Book Podcast, the complete unabridged audio version of the First and Second Editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book Podcast is an engaging cover-to-cover, word-for-word reading of all 11 chapters and Personal Stories, many of which were left out of the Third and Fourth Editions. Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Or listen on https://bigbookpodcast.com

[Disclaimer: AA Recovery Interviews podcast strictly adheres to AA’s 12 Traditions and all General Service Office guidelines for safe-guarding anonymity on-line. I pay all podcast production costs. No advertising is allowed. And no one receives financial gain from the show. AA Recovery Interviews and my guests do not speak for or represent AA at-large. This podcast is simply my way of giving back to AA that which has been so freely given to me. -Howard L.]

Ever meet someone in an AA meeting for the first time whom you can just tell is working a good Program? My guest on today’s show, Susan D., is that kind of person. When she first attended a Tuesday meeting that I’ve been going to for the past 15 years, she showed up early with the countenance and confidence of someone who has attended many meetings. She comfortably introduced herself and was soon chatting among our members who show up early for fellowship before the meeting. When the originally scheduled leader couldn’t make it, the chair asked Susan to lead the meeting. She instantly said “yes” and proceeded to lead a fine discussion, infusing her share with the experience of 19 years sober and plenty of references to the Big Book. In the following weeks and months, Susan became a regular attendee and participant at that meeting, readily accepting the service commitment of talking with newcomers and others looking for knowledgeable guidance in the Program.

Susan’s story will strike a familiar refrain for many baby boomers who became alcoholics and drug addicts. Dysfunctional home life with alcoholism rife through the family, Susan sought escape through alcohol and drugs, and a wild lifestyle common to the late 60’s and 70’s. Though a binge-drinker, her blackouts shielded her from cognitive awareness of the damage she was doing to her own life. Susan somehow managed to make it to AA in 1985, and even stayed sober for several years, but her unwillingness to embrace the Program had her skating around the periphery where she slipped time-and-again. By 2003, she’d finally hit the wall of hopeless abandon, with no spiritual armor to soften the impact. But it was the bottom that Susan had to hit in order to survive and later thrive.

As you follow Susan’s difficult journey from active alcoholic to recovered alcoholic, you’re bound to hear many similarities to your own story, as well as some differences along the way. But once you’ve heard her entire story, I think you’ll land solidly on similarities of gratitude and humility from which we can all thrive as sober alcoholics. So please enjoy the next hour of AA Recovery Interviews with my friend and AA sister, Susan D.

Check out Howard’s Big Book Podcast, the complete unabridged audio version of the First and Second Editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book Podcast is an engaging cover-to-cover, word-for-word reading of all 11 chapters and Personal Stories, many of which were left out of the Third and Fourth Editions. Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Or listen on https://bigbookpodcast.com

[Disclaimer: In strict adherence to A.A.’s traditions, my anonymous guests and I speak for ourselves only, not for Alcoholics Anonymous at large. We share only our personal experiences with A.A. recovery. We acknowledge that AA’s sole concern is the recovery and continued sobriety of those alcoholics who turn to the Fellowship for help. As members of AA, our primary purpose is to stay sober and to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety. – Howard L.]

As a medical doctor who secretly battled his own addiction to alcohol and drugs for many years, Jim's alcoholism literally affected the lives and well-being of others. Jim grew up with an abusive father whose military career relocated the family many times during Jim’s childhood and adolescence. He faced additional suffering during countless hospitalizations for medical conditions related to hemophilia, a rare bleeding disorder in which the blood does not clot properly. Turning to booze and drugs during his high school and college years, Jim’s escalating alcoholism accompanied his medical degree, internship, and residency into his position as a OB/GYN at a major hospital. Turns out that the hospital culture, with its hard-working and hard-drinking doctors and nurses, further fueled Jim’s lifestyle with alcohol and cocaine.

The effects of constant use soon threw Jim’s personal life into turmoil, replete with three failed marriages and ever-deepening despair. Professionally, his drug and alcohol- impaired medical practice became a severe threat to the safety of his patients. By the time Jim was intervened upon by his hospital and placed in rehab, he had had enough and was desperate to recover. Thankfully, he found a strong AA community that offered him the ego-deflation and no-nonsense support he needed to get sober. As he grew in that community, he built a humble new life in which he could be of real service to others, especially those in the medical profession who find it difficult to admit defeat by the disease.

Jim’s story offers a rare perspective we don’t hear often in ordinary AA meetings, especially since many physicians attend closed meetings amongst their own. But his involvement and service as an active participant in everyday AA is proof positive of a man whose AA program is on solid ground. I’m grateful Jim’s here with me on AA Recovery Interviews and believe you’ll find this podcast to be both enlightening and reassuring. So please relish the next hour with my friend and AA brother, Jim G.

Check out Howard’s Big Book Podcast, the complete unabridged audio version of the First and Second Editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book Podcast is an engaging cover-to-cover, word-for-word reading of all 11 chapters and Personal Stories, many of which were left out of the Third and Fourth Editions. Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Or listen on https://bigbookpodcast.com

[Disclaimer: In strict adherence to A.A.’s traditions, my anonymous guests and I speak for ourselves only, not for Alcoholics Anonymous at large. We share only our personal experiences with A.A. recovery. We acknowledge that AA’s sole concern is the recovery and continued sobriety of those alcoholics who turn to the Fellowship for help. As members of AA, our primary purpose is to stay sober and to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety. – Howard L.]

Jackie's story illustrates one of the most cunning aspects of alcoholism--the erroneous belief that going to AA meetings without necessarily doing the work is enough to stay sober. In Jackie’s case, she had survived her dysfunctional family and alcohol-infused failures at higher education, only to emerge as a full-blown binge drinker. As escalating alcoholism continued to addle her decisions, she escaped her first toxic marriage with two young children only to find herself drinking more than ever. Her second marriage produced three children and one still born baby.

The early-onset deterioration of that marriage caused by alcoholism persisted for 17 years until Jackie had finally had enough. She found AA and somehow stayed sober 8 years, even though her ever-diminishing involvement in the Program continually pulled her farther away from it. Her mistaken belief that she could find and maintain AA-type sobriety in church ultimately resulted in her getting drunk. It took her until 2015 to get back to AA. Beaten by the disease into a state of reasonableness, Jackie finally embraced the Program and its principals wholeheartedly. She remains sober to this day.

Jackie’s story will not be unfamiliar to AA’s who thought they could find an easier, softer way to work the Program, only to slip in the end. I’m grateful she made it back to AA and has continued to do all of the simple, but not easy, things necessary to assure daily sobriety and a happy life in the center of the Program. I think you’ll find her story to be most engaging and offer you 60 minutes of listening pleasure on today’s AA Recovery Interviews podcast with my friend and AA sister, Jackie B.

Check out Howard’s Big Book Podcast, the complete unabridged audio version of the First and Second Editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book Podcast is an engaging cover-to-cover, word-for-word reading of all 11 chapters and Personal Stories, many of which were left out of the Third and Fourth Editions. Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Or listen on https://bigbookpodcast.com

[Disclaimer: In strict adherence to A.A.’s traditions, my anonymous guests and I speak for ourselves only, not for Alcoholics Anonymous at large. We share only our personal experiences with A.A. recovery. We acknowledge that AA’s sole concern is the recovery and continued sobriety of those alcoholics who turn to the Fellowship for help. As members of AA, our primary purpose is to stay sober and to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety. – Howard L.]

Jim's life as an alcoholic began with an addiction to morphine when he was 14.  Administered four times a day while he was hospitalized for a month after a serious surgery, Jim found that morphine did more than kill the pain. It helped him escape the mental tribulations he felt from childhood on. But morphine was difficult to get and he soon found that increasing amounts of alcohol was would have largely the same results. So, he didn’t stop drinking or using drugs until he was 46. Jim’s life prior to sobriety was the familiar odyssey of drinking and drug use, to which so many alcoholics in AA can relate. But the biggest challenges and threats to his sobriety occurred after he had joined AA. At 13 months sober, his wife of 17 years was found dead from a drug overdose suicide.  At nearly 4 years sober, a drunk driver caused a near fatal motorcycle accident for Jim that landed him in the hospital for 3½ months of multiple surgeries for shattered bones and brain injury.  Released to a life of chronic pain, he also lost his beloved career as a symphonic musician. Later on in his sobriety, Jim lost his best friend to suicide. More recently, as the only child, Jim has been caring for his 91 year old mother who’s been very sick.

Handling the tragedies that have befallen him during sobriety, as well as the gifts that have come from it, Jim has stayed firmly planted in the action part of his AA Program. Sponsoring other men and ceaseless service have never failed to improve the quality of his sobriety no matter what he faces in life. Jim’s story is both courageous and captivating. It provides a roadmap for navigating troubled times and an inspiring optimism for living a happy life in midst of Alcoholics Anonymous. So please enjoy this episode of AA Recovery Interviews with my fine friend and AA brother, Jim D. 

Check out Howard’s Big Book Podcast, the complete unabridged audio version of the First and Second Editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book Podcast is an engaging cover-to-cover, word-for-word reading of all 11 chapters and Personal Stories, many of which were left out of the Third and Fourth Editions. Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Or listen on https://bigbookpodcast.com

[Disclaimer: In strict adherence to A.A.’s traditions, my anonymous guests and I speak for ourselves only, not for Alcoholics Anonymous at large. We share only our personal experiences with A.A. recovery. We acknowledge that AA’s sole concern is the recovery and continued sobriety of those alcoholics who turn to the Fellowship for help. As members of AA, our primary purpose is to stay sober and to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety. – Howard L.]

Victoria started drinking early to deal with the strife of abuse she suffered as a child and the trauma she experienced at 15 witnessing the aftermath of a bloody massacre in the Philippines. Living with the shock and horror were more than enough propel her alcohol-dominated life for the next 20 years. Then she found AA.

Victoria is the first guest on AA Recovery Interviews whose spouse, Wes H., shared his story on an earlier podcast. They got sober together within days of each other over 30 years ago. Hearing both their stories provides unique context to their journeys before and after getting sober. Victoria’s story stands very much on its own. Raised in a military home by a mother with bi-polar disorder and a physically abusive father, her life as the oldest of 3 children was further complicated by frequent moves around world. The alcohol she found early helped ease the madness and numb the traumatic events she experienced along the way. Access to alcohol by hook or crook on military bases fueled self-destructive behavior that followed her into adulthood. By the time she found AA sobriety in 1992, alcoholism had taken a huge toll on her body, exacerbating medical conditions that required 31 surgeries over the years. Through it all, Victoria’s unceasing involvement in AA, and working with others, helped her survive death’s numerous importunities. One of her last surgeries during the past year was literally do or die. She credits Wes and her AA family for pulling her through with prayers and the collective healing energy of love.

My interview with Victoria on today’s AA Recovery Interviews podcast runs a little longer than others, but flies by as her story unfolds. It’s a story that helps further define the phrase “Experience, strength, and hope.” So grab a cuppa and become engrossed for the next hour and ten minutes in the story of my friend and AA sister, Victoria H.

Check out Howard’s Big Book Podcast, the complete unabridged audio version of the First and Second Editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book Podcast is an engaging cover-to-cover, word-for-word reading of all 11 chapters and Personal Stories, many of which were left out of the Third and Fourth Editions. Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Or listen on https://bigbookpodcast.com

[Disclaimer: In strict adherence to A.A.’s traditions, my anonymous guests and I speak for ourselves only, not for Alcoholics Anonymous at large. We share only our personal experiences with A.A. recovery. We acknowledge that AA’s sole concern is the recovery and continued sobriety of those alcoholics who turn to the Fellowship for help. As members of AA, our primary purpose is to stay sober and to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety. – Howard L.]

Larry got sober at age 65, finally claiming his chair in AA after drinking his entire adult life. As a life-long bachelor, he was also a loner. For decades, his daily routine consisted of working long hours, then putting in a shift at the bar, literally drinking until closing time several days a week. Whatever little social life Larry had was confined to occasional barroom acquaintances. Drinking took its toll over the years as Larry lost jobs for poor performance which he attributes to the burgeoning alcoholism he was unaware of at the time. Larry sought professional help for many years through psycho-therapy. But in those sessions, his alcoholism was somehow obfuscated by other problems, such as anger and resentment, that needed to be dealt with first. Fortunately, one of his therapists helped Larry realize that alcohol was ruining his life, and that he should attend AA. The rest, as they say, is history, replete with the same fear, doubt, indignation, uncertainty, and apprehension that many AA newcomers face. Though he experienced somewhat of a slow start, Larry attended meetings and didn’t drink in-between. Eventually, he got a sponsor and worked the steps in earnest, while his new-found fellowship relieved his isolation. Notably and estimably, Larry became immersed in service work through his participation in correctional facilities committees, bringing desperately-needed AA into county jails and state prisons.

At 75, Larry’s involvement in AA is both admirable and dependable. It models the power of AA recovery that’s available to everyone, even those who’ve spent most of their adult lives in the disease. Proving it’s never to late to pursue and achieve sobriety in AA, Larry’s story is one everybody should hear, especially those who’ve waited too many years to get sober. So, for the next hour, please enjoy my intriguing discussion with my fine friend and AA brother, Larry L.  

Check out Howard’s Big Book Podcast, the complete unabridged audio version of the First and Second Editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book Podcast is an engaging cover-to-cover, word-for-word reading of all 11 chapters and Personal Stories, many of which were left out of the Third and Fourth Editions. Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Or listen on https://bigbookpodcast.com

[Disclaimer: In strict adherence to A.A.’s traditions, my anonymous guests and I speak for ourselves only, not for Alcoholics Anonymous at large. We share only our personal experiences with A.A. recovery. We acknowledge that AA’s sole concern is the recovery and continued sobriety of those alcoholics who turn to the Fellowship for help. As members of AA, our primary purpose is to stay sober and to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety. – Howard L.]

Max grew up in a horribly alcoholic home with a mother who later died of cirrhosis and organ failure from drinking. To deal with the madness, Max began drinking at 13 to escape the feelings wrought by the dysfunction of her alcoholic family. Her own alcohol use escalated through high school and college well into her twenties. She admits that, at the time, she knew intellectually that drinking was connected with something terrible, but she kept on. Seeking relief from her alcoholism and co-occurring clinical depression, she was prescribed Zanex which opened the realm of drug addiction on top of everything else. By the time she hit the doors of AA nearly 22 years ago, Max was thoroughly licked, as old-timers like to say. She participated in the Program for the first eight years, while harboring her use and secret abuse of benzodiazepines. While she frantically tried to rationalize, then justify, her use of benzo’s while in AA, the truth finally won out. She came clean to her sponsor and her groups, re-setting her sobriety date in 2008. From that point on, Max’s Program took on new meaning and importance. She connected as never before to the spiritual and service elements of AA. She works an active Program from the inside of AA, sponsoring women with whom she has deep and meaningful relationships.

With all the interviews I’ve done on this podcast, I’m continually impressed with the quality of sobriety and depth of commitment to the Program that my guests demonstrate. Max’s story is an ideal example of a woman’s redemption from isolation, self-loathing and spiritual emptiness to a life filled with fellowship and joy. So, take a few deep breaths, settle back, and relish this episode of AA Recovery Interviews with my friend and AA sister, Max A.

Check out Howard’s Big Book Podcast, the complete unabridged audio version of the First and Second Editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book Podcast is an engaging cover-to-cover, word-for-word reading of all 11 chapters and Personal Stories, many of which were left out of the Third and Fourth Editions. Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Or listen on https://bigbookpodcast.com

[Disclaimer: In strict adherence to A.A.’s traditions, my anonymous guests and I speak for ourselves only, not for Alcoholics Anonymous at large. We share only our personal experiences with A.A. recovery. We acknowledge that AA’s sole concern is the recovery and continued sobriety of those alcoholics who turn to the Fellowship for help. As members of AA, our primary purpose is to stay sober and to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety. – Howard L.]