Authentic

My ego's greatest fear is being taken down. I have a story that goes something like this. "If I be me, I'll be taken down and have nothing left. I'll have everything to lose and I can't bear that pain again. So don't have anything to lose".

Recently this came up when I was doing a process on being my real and raw self. The same story reared its head and it became obvious that my ego is so consumed with, "not being me", because if I'm not the true me, then nothing can hurt me. As a result, if I stayed focused on that, protecting myself for fear of being rejected and alone, I'd abandon my soul for a false sense of security.

Listen to the podcast for the deep insights and how this can relate to the stories your ego sells you.

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I've got big dreams that I focus on and act in favour of. I call them my True North Stars, or end results. These are the desires in my heart that long for me to live into, embody and materialise. They help me grow, be more resourceful and challenge the shit outta my limiting beliefs.

A few of my clients ask me, "but what about on the daily Kat? What about little goals for the day, do you set them?" For sure I do. I call these, "my daily practice". When I ask myself, "what am I in the practice of today?", I intend for the practice to help me serve my highest good and the good of others. This becomes a mini end result for me to keep me in check and remind myself that this is the matter I want to make matter.

In today's episode I share about how I go about this in greater depth in hope to serve you in your journey.

Lotsa love x

kat.john
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In 2013, I wrote a peace essay on what peace means to me. It was an essay competition led by Rotary, that would see 10 young people chosen to go to the Rotary Global Peace Forum in Japan. 60 applicants sent their essays in, me included, and I was one of the 10 chosen to go.

At this time in my life, I had overcome chronic pain, stopped taking medication, broke up from my co-dependent six year relationship and felt like something in me was calling for more. I had overcome so much adversity and felt like an overflowing cup of energy, power and a new zest for life. Something in wanted to give back and take the learnings I had learned and share them.

I spoke to my Dad about this. Dad's a devoted Rotarian and pointed me in the direction of some programs I could get involved in, plus the peace essay. These were the first steps I took towards a path that I couldn't see clearly into, but I could feel it.

In today's episode I share this journey and the essay that I wrote (with a few tears). I believe this episode is an important one as when I wrote this essay, I had no firm vision around what I wanted to do, but had a feeling in me that wanted to be explored. Choosing to follow the feeling led me to where I am today, and maybe there is a feeling inside of you waiting to be acted upon too.

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Can you tell when you're in egoic truth (illusion) versus "truth" truth?

In my illusion (although it feels like reality), I’m right and everyone else is wrong. They’re the problem, not me. I haven’t done anything wrong, it’s all on them. They have to change, not me!
My head hurts. I’m tunnel visioned. My energy and heart is closed for business and I’m defensive as all hell. Then I judge, project, separate and disconnect (what a catch)!

When I am aware of myself in this ego drunken state, to sober myself up I unplug from the noise in my head and tune into KAT'S SOUL FM Radio Station (aka, my soul). In there I have access to higher truth and have greater capacity to expand my view of myself, others and life beyond limited thinking.

It's a humbling process to come out of illusion and back into reality. It'll hurt your ego but liberate your soul.

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I fooled myself. I'd tell myself if I did "this", then I'd be rewarded by the Universe and be deemed a true spiritual person. The stories I'd tell myself if I did or didn't do my practices was causing mental disturbance, unrelenting standards and a path of spiritual perfection.

I'm all down for keeping our minds in check and doing the work. But sometimes, part of doing the work is allowing ourselves to be human, to be real with our emotions and to feel what's going on before spiritually bypassing everything with practices.

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We have reached the final session of the coaching series with my Legends, and to finish us off, Michelle has bravely brought herself forward.

Michelle lived for everyone else for a really long time. Her needs, wants or desires weren't ever up for consideration because in her belief system, everyone else's needs, wants or desires were for her to support. 

" Kat, I have been living and operating unconsciously for so long, that I have had a massive realisation that I have not taken personal responsibility for anything for as long as I can remember.  I have just gone along with whatever anyone wants to do, have been too afraid to make decisions that might “rock the boat”, have not used my voice, and have lost myself - I am 53. For my whole life I have felt as though I am unworthy and that is why I have let others make decisions for me.  I am also a procrastinator and think of, “what if this goes wrong?" My husband was in a relationship with another woman for 2 and a half years, 9 years ago.  Can you believe that I have hung around for this long? I have been pretending for soooooooo long".

As a result, many of her deep inner longings have gone unacknowledged and unnoticed, and now she is rebuilding herself, doing the work and digging deep into herself. Michelle's story is a familiar one to so many and I am thrilled to share her with you all.

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After the coaching series with four of my Legends, two additional Legends reached out and said they were keen to jump on board. And I couldn't resist!

Sylwia's primary limiting belief is, I need to be perfect, and this belief is interfering with her desire to pursue her passion for photography and take the next step in getting experience. In today's coaching call, we uncover where this belief stems from and what her environment was like as a child to feel the need to be perfect.

The reasons that are blocking her from taking the next steps revolve around, "what if she's not good at it, or the photos don't turn out good, or that she may not enjoy doing it". I share with her how her ego is making it about her and not the true end result, which is to express herself through photography.

Listen up to today's episode and see how Sylwia shifts from avoiding taking action to being made accountable for her next best step.

kat.john
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My coaching client and legend, Kat, is upgrading herself in monumental ways. She's currently navigating life and herself without the unconscious need to put everyone else first, do what serves her and connect more deeply with her true self.

This is creating a shit storm for her ego. Her ego sees her as the helper, the pleaser, the "shut your mouth woman and get on with it" kinda woman. Since she was little, seeking validation from those around her became her job description. When her mum died and step-father left, she doubled-down to become the carer of her two sisters and shoved her needs aside.

You'll hear in this episode just how much this decision has fkd with her over her years. And now, she's writing a new story for herself.

kat.john
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When Kieran reached out and emailed the below, I knew he had to come on the podcast.

"After so long of thinking I knew who I was, I realise and understand that my lifestyle and a job I miss dearly, clouded my actual perception of myself as I would tend to live two separate lives (I guess a contrast of my ego vs my heart). I am learning ways in which to deal with this anxiety when it happens but I just want to understand more and how to lean into my kick-ass self".

In this episode, it becomes clear to Kieran why he learned to shove his feelings and needs aside to ensure he wasn't an extra burden on his mum. Her ease came before his which led him to carry on and be okay when wasn't. This pattern created a reality of unconsciously finding ways to escape reality, and in most recent times this was through his work.

Now, life for Kieran is about staying with reality which is helping him be more real and facing things rather than running from them. Amen to you Kieran.

kat.john
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When Eve and I jumped on this coaching call, to hear that her belief system said that there were only two options for how she could operate in the world, and that to get someone to love her were, "don't be too much or make sure you're enough", hurt my heart.

In today's episode, we uncover where this belief came from, how this has impacted Eve's life up until today in relationships and how she shows up, and how life could be moving forward if she allowed herself to be who she is, rather than constantly adapting and abandoning herself.

Eve, I am so damn proud of you for being so real and raw in this episode. Amen to you!

**If you want to trust yourself more, make powerful choices in your life and back them, and become more of who you truly are then hit me up in my DMs about The Legends. There is a $300 saving on this epic 12-month coaching program so be sure to snap it up!

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