Authentic

Steve was climbing to the top of an illusionary mountain of obtaining it all, hoping to find happiness. But when he reached the top he was no closer to happiness, if anything he was further away. What came next was divorce, the loss of his children and family, his company, his wealth and entire identity. This is a story of complete identity crisis and choosing to rebuild from the inside out.

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It's easy to look at my two mates, Toddy and Trent, and think they have it all. They couldn't possibly have any bad days or anything wrong with their life. But that ain't the truth. From healing from divorce, mental breakdowns and addiction, these two legends are showing up with all the shit in their pockets, bearing their hearts to the world and creating well-rounded communities with their 440 movement. 

https://www.instagram.com/the_440/

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When you say you're going to do something and don't do it, you erode self trust. Self trust and following through is something many of us seek but aren't prepared to do. The ego wants to do things that are easy, that it knows how to do and looks for shinier objects to focus on which causes distraction. The distraction leads to not following through on your original intention and then you end up making lame excuses for why you didn't get the original thing done in the first place. Ugh, tiring right? 

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I stand behind that being a true leader is to lead from the front. That you can show up, not be okay and still be a powerful fkn legend. I believe a true leader doesn’t just preach the, “it’s okay to not be okay” message, but instead embodies it and applies the tools to shift the shit.

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It's painful watching the people around you that you love suffer. You want to help them, cheer them on to victory and offer pumped up words in hope of inspiring change. But if you're doing this, nothing is changing and you're meeting resistance, here's what I suggest.

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FOMO often got the better of me, which meant it took a while to stop habits like smoking, drugs, binge drinking, binge bitching, binge complaining and all the rest. My people pleasing desire to fit in and be part of the gang overrided my true desire to live life how I wanted to. I had to make peace with the fact that shifting to a new level of life involved growing pains and that my life wasn't about fitting in anymore.

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I hate to admit it but yep, I do have control issues and it comes out in the form of wanting a perfect house with perfectly puffed pillows that are perfectly colour coordinated. Over the years I have made this matter more than what is truly important and it's been recently tested since becoming a step-mum. For anyone out there who knows what I'm talking about, you'll want to listen to this.

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You can be anxious about your dreams and still fulfil them. You can be overwhelmed about your souls vision and still bring it to life. You can be scared about making changes that lead into the unknown and still take that step forward. Trying to fix the sh!t conditions before fulfilling your dreams only puts your dreams heartbeat on hold and keeps the unwanted condition alive.

Meet life heart on with all the shit and show up anyway.

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Steve and I don't fight. We sure as hell see things differently (because he's always wrong and I'm always right, haha), and we absolutely have our moments where we want to yell, scream, shutdown and control the other - but we don't. We have committed to a relationship that has a certain energy, emotion and vibe and when we're off path, we do specific things so we remain connected, in our hearts and in love. 

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Making powerful choices and decisions means you are a powerful person, and most of us have forgotten how powerful we truly are. I catch myself plenty of times pretending not to be powerful and it results in behaviours that are counterintuitive to where and what my heart truly longs to do. Awareness is always key to shift the sh!t but it isn't enough - you have to do something about.

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