Character Analysis

A listener writes in to spill the tea (literally) about a high-profile professional's wife who confessed to scaring her husband into fidelity. She faked an affair accusation with help from her family, spies on his phone, and constantly keeps him on edge—all while calling it "playing around." Her reasoning? It keeps him at home and loyal. The listener’s mom, who shared the story, is baffled and thinks it’s manipulative. The writer wonders: genius or unhinged?

Discuss!

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When a friend asks her group to boycott a dinner party because her ex-husband and his new girlfriend are invited, tensions rise. Are the wives being disloyal by attending, or is the request unreasonable? We explore the tricky balance of loyalty, fairness, and maintaining friendships after a breakup.

In "Why Are Men" news, a woman goes on a second date with a man who refuses to order dinner after, you know, inviting her to dinner. Was he cheap or just fcking weird? Tell us in the comments.

We also cover the mental health aspect of the Luigi Mangione case and how it may have played a role in the crime. Are women falling for him because they think they can fix him?

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A listener wants to know how to stop pressing the bruise after a breakup. Here's her letter:

I have a tendency to get caught up in limerence and stalk my exes Spotify to see what he puts on his playlists. This has often kept me stuck on him, since some of the songs appeared to specifically reference issues he and I had.

I recently stalked him and saw that he was creating playlists with another girl. I looked the girl up of course, and she looks like a prettier and thinner version of me. I know it’s my fault for prying but how do I not let this fuck with me.

I’ve vowed to stop stalking him but feel horrible about myself and rageful that this shitty man was able to pull someone hotter than me. Thanks for having this space to let me send in letters where I’m being petty and ridiculous.

Grateful for both of you and the podcast.

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Sarah and I share some of our favorite (and most cringe-inducing) lines from the iconic series. Listen to hear which ones held up two decades later.

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Four and a half years ago, Tiktok Creator Lisa aka @stalkedbythefeds had an affair with TV Personality and former US Marshal Lenny DePaul. The relationship only lasted a few weeks. Lisa said that after finding out DePaul was married, she ended things and contacted his wife, Ellie.

As some form of punishment for exposing the affair, DePaul allegedly called in a favor and got Lisa put under Federal Investigation.

As long-time listeners know, I'm like a dog with a bone when I encounter stories like this.

Lisa's story doesn't add up. Listen to our analysis and share your thoughts in the comments.

Just a reminder that the first episode of each month is free. To listen to our weekly embers-only episodes, become a paid subscriber. You'll receive 3 weekly members-only episodes, bonus content, and access to private advice letter posts. Subscribe here: https://creators.spotify.com/pod/show/dateologycoach/subscribe

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Then, after making romantic getaway plans that included spending almost a thousand dollars, you find out the person you thought might be The One never existed.

Leigh* joins us for this episode to discuss her experience with a romance scammer. We also review some of the messages and highlight the different psychological tactics the scammer used to manipulate Leigh.

*Not her real name

"I asked him if there was something I could do to comfort him with how busy he is and he said “just go relax this evening, watch a show and some tiktoks.” I was really pissed at how condescending this was. I’m also busy – I run two business ventures and am starting a woman’s magazine. He works in investment banking and said “work is all I do, hun.” I used to be a VP in banking before becoming an entrepreneur so YES, I do understand demands of this job."

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We recently received a letter from a long-time listener seeking clarity on her mother's advice. She wonders whether men are drawn more to women who embrace a relaxed and casual style than those who resemble models fresh off the cover of Vogue. We disagree with her mother's advice and explain why a man might suggest a woman dress down for dates.

We also provided feedback to a man looking to spruce up his Tinder bio. I advised him to remove the opening line. There are many ways to interpret that sentence, most of which are off-putting.

Read the bio here:

https://www.patreon.com/posts/115154340

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Yesterday, dozens of relatives of Erik and Lyle Menendez gathered in front of an LA courthouse to advocate for the brother's release. In their speeches, they all addressed the lack of understanding of trauma and abuse that was prevalent in the early nineties when their case was first tried. Family members (as well as the brother's lawyer) also commented that had it been The Menendez Sisters charged with the murder of their parents the case would have had a different outcome.

Sarah and I talk about how toxic masculinity and misogyny played supporting roles in this crime and the ensuing trial.

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