Why do we keep finding ourselves in the same frustrating dating patterns, no matter how much we try to shake things up? In Episode 393 of The Charisma Quotient, “ICYMI: What Is Your Dating Archetype?” Kimmy gets to the heart of the matter by introducing her breakthrough framework: the Five Dating Archetypes. Whether you’re struggling to meet the right person or find yourself replaying old dynamics, this episode is your fast track to self-awareness—and real change.

Drawing from years as a leading dating and makeover expert, therapist, and matchmaker, Kimmy has worked with thousands of women (and men!) both in her “Wing Girl” sessions and individualized coaching practice. She’s seen personality patterns repeat across clients and created the Five Dating Archetypes to help you identify what may be holding you back and possibly creating a love shield you are not aware of. Kimmy was inspired to create this framework after noticing similar challenges in client after client, whether working with high-profile celebrities or everyday singles.

In this lively, down-to-earth conversation, Kimmy breaks down each archetype in detail, describing telltale behaviors, mindsets, and the powerful ways your history shapes your dating style. You’ll hear real-life stories—like the Hollywood powerhouse whose “Chief” energy was intimidating every man she met, or the “List Lady” whose sky-high standards secretly protected her from heartbreak. Kimmy shares deeply personal accounts, including courageous clients who overcame trauma or old roles to open up to love again—proving that transformation is possible no matter your situation or age.

 You’ll hear:

• An overview of the “Big 5” dating archetypes

• How subtle things like your body language, wardrobe choices, communication style, and past wounds could be sending the wrong signals in love.

• Practical strategies and “secret weapons” for each archetype, from developing self-awareness to making small tweaks that yield big changes in your confidence and connection with others.

• Why most of us fall into these same patterns, and exactly what you can do to break free.

If you want to know what kind of dating archetype you are, take her free archetype quiz https://form.jotform.com/231376592380157 an then book a FREE private call with Kimmy to discuss ways of overcoming your love challenges:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com

The key to lasting love is more than just chemistry, it’s really knowing how you (and your partner) handle conflict. It’s communication, emotional intelligence and how you handle stress that builds a lasting connection and relationship  In Episode 394 of The Charisma Quotient, "Stop Dating the Wrong People: Decode Your Conflict Style with Dr. John Elliot,” Kimmy is joined by Dr. John Elliot, an acclaimed psychologist, conflict resolution expert, and co-author of "How to Get Along With Anyone." With a career spanning consulting for NASA, the US Olympic Committee, the Mayo Clinic, Fortune 500 companies, and appearances in outlets like The New York Times and ESPN, Dr. Elliot is uniquely equipped to reveal why true relationship success depends on how you both show up when the going gets tough—not just when it’s smooth sailing.

Together, Kimmy and Dr. Elliot break down the five conflict personality styles—the Avoider, Competitor, Analyzer, Collaborator, and Accommodator—explaining the habits, triggers, and communication patterns that come out when tension rises. You’ll hear actionable advice on how to identify your own (and others’) conflict styles, why some personality pairings struggle while others thrive, and how to turn moments of tension into lasting intimacy instead of drama or distance. They discuss why your "must-have list" should go beyond looks or job titles, and how picking up on someone’s conflict style early can save you heartache down the road.

 You’ll hear:

• The “five conflict personality styles”—discover if you’re an Avoider, Competitor, Analyzer, Collaborator, or Accommodator (and why it matters so much!) 

• How mismatched conflict styles sabotage romantic chemistry—and what style pairings work best for long-term happiness

• Real stories from pro sports, high-stakes business, and dating that illustrate these personality clashes and how they’re resolved

• Simple, practical tools and mindset shifts to help you attract, connect with, and keep truly compatible partners

If you’ve ever felt stuck repeating the same painful patterns, or want to break free from being an overgiver, people-pleaser, or the “nice guy,” book a FREE private breakthrough call with Kimmy:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com

Are your past experiences getting in your way when it comes to dating? Specifically you may have a fear of abandonment that stems from childhood which is the reason you push people away subconsciously. Most people don’t realize that they hold onto their past traumas which impacts relationships. Fears that are created from this dynamic makes dating feel frustrating and anxiety-provoking. In Episode 393 of The Charisma Quotient, “Fear of Abandonment in Dating: Why You Push Love Away ~ Coaching With Kimmy” Kimmy coaches a woman live on this episode whose personal history and experiences echo the struggles many face in the realm of intimacy and self-perception. 

In this coaching session, Kimmy and Evelyn delve into the intricacies of how past abandonment issues can manifest in adult relationships, influencing the patterns we fall into and the people we attract. From forming quick, intense attachments to pushing partners away through self-sabotage, the discussion covers a spectrum of behaviors that many listeners will find familiar. Evelyn shares poignant anecdotes, such as the emotionally charged and rapid-moving relationship that led her to relocate across the country, only to find herself ensnared in familiar emotional pitfalls. Her story is a testament to the power of self-awareness and the challenges of translating that awareness into action.

 You’ll hear:

• The top 5 ways a fear of abandonment may show up in a person’s romantic relationships and actionable steps for tackling these deep-seated fears. 

• The concept of "shape-shifting" in relationships and why it causes you to lose touch with your authentic self.

• Actionable steps from Kimmy for rewriting personal stories and reinforcing self-worth.

• How seeking excessive reassurance from partners can lead to emotional exhaustion and breakdowns in relationships.

• The duality of either erecting emotional walls or forming overly rapid attachments as a result of abandonment fears.

• An unsuspected breakthrough Evelyn had on the call that caught her by surprise on why dating has been so hard.

If you want help overcoming your fears around dating book a FREE private breakthrough call with Kimmy:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com

Did you know that anxiety disorders affect 18% of the adult population in the United States? Anxiety is your body’s natural response to stress and uncertainty. Let’s face it - uncertainty is a huge part of dating.  Kimmy talks about understanding Dating Anxiety which is a common experience that involves excessive worry, fear, and nervousness related to dating. It can manifest in various ways, affecting a person's thoughts, emotions, and behaviors during the dating process. In Episode 392 of The Charisma Quotient, “Overcoming Dating Anxiety: Interview with Katie Krimitsos,” Kimmy is joined by Katie Krimitsos, the founder and CEO of the Women's Meditation Network, who talks about her personal journey with meditation and self-awareness.

In this engaging conversation, Kimmy and Katie delve into the epidemic of dating anxiety, discussing its common symptoms like fear of awkward conversations, obsessive checking for texts, and the constant nagging thought of not being "good enough." Katie candidly shares her journey from feeling not enough to mastering self-awareness through meditation. She reveals how simple practices of mindfulness have helped her tackle overwhelming thoughts, embrace vulnerability, and most importantly, trust herself in relationships.

Get ready for Katie's transformative story of how, by embodying authenticity and letting go of the need to control, she attracted a soulmate relationship that flourished into marriage. Discover her ingenious concept of "mini meditations" – bite-sized, practical practices that even the busiest among us can integrate into our daily routines to stay grounded and present.

 You’ll hear:

• Eight common symptoms of dating anxiety and tips on how to recognize and manage them.

• Innovative strategies to incorporate meditation into your daily routine — even for those who've never meditated before — to help ground you before a date.

• A powerful reminder that "what's meant for you will not miss you".

• How to embrace imperfection and vulnerability in relationships for true connection.

• A surprise mini meditation that you’ll be able to practice right away

If you struggle with dating anxiety and it is hindering your ability to stay present and it is pushing people away, check out Katie’s amazing meditations including her 3 day stress and anxiety detox by going to womensmeditationnetwork.com and then hop on a private call with Kimmy to reduce your dating anxiety by coming up with a plan here  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com

Do you consider yourself an introvert? Are you in your head a lot and analyze everything to death to the point that it’s affecting your dating life?  In Episode 391 of The Charisma Quotient, “ICYMI: Navigating Dating as an Introvert: Coaching with Kimmy,” Kimmy coaches Evan live on the episode to help him get out of his own way when dating.

In this coaching session, Kimmy and Evan delve into the challenges that introverts face, from the exhausting overthinking in social scenarios to navigating extrovert-dominated dating environments. Evan shares his poignant story of overcoming Bell's palsy, a condition that not only affected his confidence but also became a turning point in his life. Through self-discovery and transformation, Evan emerged stronger and more in tune with himself—an inspiring testament to resilience and personal growth. Kimmy offers practical advice on how to shift from reactive to proactive approaches in dating, ultimately paving the way for healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

 You’ll hear:

• The magic of leaning into discomfort of social interactions to get over the fears attached to it

• How to stop overthinking and start taking action in dating.

• The significance of addressing the discomfort introverts feel in social situations.

• How to alleviate anxiety in order to make more genuine connections with others.

If you are an introvert and want help stepping out of your comfort zone and come up with a plan to put yourself out there, book a FREE breakthrough call with Kimmy:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com

Discover the transformative journey of overcoming dating doubts and embracing confidence in episode 390 of The Charisma Quotient, “The Confidence Love Makeover: Where Are They Now with Doug,” Kimmy sits down with Doug, a former client who successfully transitioned from repeated relationship misfires to a future filled with love and commitment. Doug, a therapist himself, found that while he was adept at uplifting others, his self-doubt and past baggage were hurdles he couldn't seem to overcome alone in the dating world.

In this engaging episode, Doug recounts his evolution with Kimmy's guidance, moving from what he describes as "the geeky guy" to someone brimming with "sexy confidence" and self-assurance. The duo dives into Doug’s struggles with seeking external validation and how his non-verbal cues, unbeknownst to him, played a significant role in his dating life. Kimmy helped him unpack these barriers, notably during a memorable encounter at a pet store which brought to light a subtle, yet impactful gesture that encapsulated Doug’s internal struggles. You’ll hear:

• How childhood trauma can influence your adult interactions.

• How changing your wardrobe and mastering body language can be pivotal in reinventing your self-perception and confidence.

• How Doug’s newfound genuine energy connected him with his future wife.

• Doug’s journey of maintaining a successful relationship, emphasizing the importance of open communication and mutual dedication to make it last.

If you’re ready to make a transformation, Kimmy has a new workshop coming up on March 25th - The Dating Improv Game where you can practice creating chemistry through play. You will learn how to harness the power of flirty moves, engaging conversations, and body language to create lasting impressions through a series of mock dates and coaching.  Register now at www.stophatingdating.com.

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com 

Are you questioning if your time to find lasting love has passed after hitting 40? Let go of the doubts! In Episode 389 of The Charisma Quotient, “Later Daters: Finding Love at Any Age – Interview with Dr. John Gray,” Kimmy is thrilled to welcome back the legendary Dr. John Gray, author of the groundbreaking "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus," as he debunks age-related myths and explores the invigorating world of second-chance romances. With his extensive knowledge and experience, John explains why the desire for companionship doesn't change with age and how both men and women can rediscover love beyond their youthful years.

In their candid discussion, Kimmy and John unravel the complexities of dating later in life, emphasizing the importance of embracing newfound freedom and the playful aspects of dating. They delve into the changes in male and female dynamics and explore how aging affects relationships and sex drives. John shares fascinating statistics, such as the discrepancy in how men and women typically move on after divorce, highlighting differences in motivation and readiness. You’ll hear:

• Key strategies for embracing your feminine energy, allowing yourself to feel sexy and confident, which is vital for attracting solid and meaningful connections.

• Practical and scientific explanations of the dynamics of testosterone and estrogen in fostering attraction and maintaining chemistry in later life.

• Fascinating data on remarriage rates among those who are over 50, illustrating that love the second time around is not only possible but probable.

• A touching story about one of Kimmy's clients, a widow who rediscovered love unexpectedly, leading to a heartwarming marriage announcement.

If you’re ready to navigate the dating scene later in life, Kimmy has a new workshop coming up on March 25th - The Dating Improv Game where you can practice creating chemistry through play. You will learn how to harness the power of flirty moves, engaging conversations, and body language to create lasting impressions through a series of mock dates and coaching.  Register now at www.stophatingdating.com.

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com

Are you tired of feeling like dating is a chore rather than a fun and exciting adventure? Did you know that being fun and playful are the top attributes that people inherently look for when dating and ultimately landing a partner? In Episode 388 of The Charisma Quotient, “ICYMI: How To Be Playful & Fun When Dating,” Kimmy emphasizes in this episode playfulness as a vital trait in attracting a partner and how often it outranks traditional attributes like intelligence or career success in desirability.

During the episode, Kimmy tackles common hurdles that hinder playfulness, such as cultural upbringing or fear of judgment. Through compelling client stories, like that of a high-achieving woman who, despite her success, struggled to connect until she embraced playfulness, listeners gain a real-world glimpse into the magic of letting loose. This client, who once saw dating as another boardroom challenge, learned to dance in the realm of whimsical conversation and flirty femininity, eventually attracting a partner who adored her lively energy. You’ll hear:

• Practical strategies to tap into your inner child and why it's crucial to incorporate play into your routine.

• Actionable tips on how to approach dating with a lighthearted spirit.

• Why flirting is a way to be present and engaging without the serious intention of an outcome.

• How embracing playfulness can alleviate exhaustion from dating.

If you tend to be a little serious in your interactions and need help incorporating fun in your dates, Kimmy has a new workshop coming up on March 25th - The Dating Improv Game where you can practice creating chemistry through play. You will learn how to harness the power of flirty moves, engaging conversations, and body language to create lasting impressions through a series of mock dates and coaching.  Register now at www.stophatingdating.com.

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com

Getting back into the dating game after losing a partner can feel daunting. But you’re not alone. So many people go through this, and it is possible to get back out there. In Episode 387 of The Charisma Quotient, “From Grief to Growth: Where Are They Now with Allen,” Kimmy brings on one of her coaching clients Allen, a remarkable man who transformed his life and love journey after the heartbreaking loss of his wife. Known for his analytical mind as a former lawyer, Allen found himself struggling with the intricacies of dating in the modern world. Being in his late 60s, he realized he needed guidance to enhance his dating confidence and flirting skills.  After working with Kimmy and dating several women, Allen is now dating someone whom he really enjoys!

Through Kimmy's coaching, Allen embarked on a process of reinvention, which not only rebuilt his confidence but also reshaped his outlook on dating. This episode delves into Allen's hesitation to dive back into the dating pool and how Kimmy's unique approach helped him overcome the fear and intimidation that comes with starting over. They discuss the evolution of Allen’s dating strategies, highlighting the importance of having fun rather than focusing strictly on outcomes. You’ll hear:

• Practical advice for anyone feeling overwhelmed when stepping out there again.

• How Allen overcame his analytical tendencies and learned to embrace the playful side of dating.

• Allen’s story of re-entering the dating world after losing his wife.

• The power of stepping out of your comfort zone to create real opportunities for connection.

If you are struggling to put yourself out there, book a call with Kimmy to kick start a dating plan to motivate you! https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com

Navigating modern dating can feel exhausting. It’s easy to get lost in the fast pace of swiping and online dating. But dating doesn’t have to feel like so much work.  In Episode 386 of The Charisma Quotient, “The Traps Of Modern Dating:  Interview Julie Krafchick & Yue Xu,” Kimmy is joined by Julie and Yue, dynamic co-hosts of the critically acclaimed Dateable podcast and authors of the anticipated book "How to Be Dateable." With nearly a decade of research exploring the intricacies of dating, they have a wealth of expertise when it comes to transforming from confused daters to respected dating insiders.

Throughout the episode, Kimmy, Julie, and Yue engage in a lively discussion on the four main dating traps that ensnare many in today's fast-paced dating scene. From the "expectation of love on demand" to the hazards of "settling paradox," they break down these traps with research-backed insights and personal anecdotes. Julie shares her story of spending over two years in a situationship driven by the need for validation. Yue opens up about her own dating missteps, involving a hiking date and a pair of infamous black socks.  You’ll hear the 3 of them breakdown:

• Why being grounded and living in the moment is critical to fostering genuine connections and finding lasting love.

• The importance of focusing on understanding yourself and dating without the expectation of immediate attachment.

• The specific skills needed for modern dating, such as DMing and flirt texting.

• How to avoid moving too quickly and ignoring red flags in the desire to form relationships.

If you are burnt out doing online dating and want to learn how to meet people IRL (In Real Life) join Kimmy’s next workshop - Meeting IRL on February 26 by signing up at www.stophatingdating.com.

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life. ⁣

************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy?⁣

Website:  https://kimmyseltzer.com/⁣

Chat:  https://meetme.so/kimbreakthrough⁣

Instagram: @kimmyseltzer

Twitter: @kimmyseltzer

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/lovemakeovers

Take her Flirt Quiz to see what kind of flirt you are www.flirtover40.com