Coaching for Leaders

BJ Fogg: Tiny Habits

BJ Fogg is a behavior scientist, with deep experience in innovation and teaching. He's directed a research lab at Stanford University for over 20 years. He trains innovators to create solutions that influence behavior for good in the areas of health, sustainability, financial wellbeing, learning, productivity, and more.

He is an expert in behavior change, from habit formation to company culture change. Fortune Magazine named him a "New Guru You Should Know" for his insights about mobile and social networks. His is the author of the New York Times bestseller Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything*.

In this conversation, BJ and I discuss why new information alone doesn’t tend to lead to the behavior change most of us want. Instead, we explore BJ’s research and a key, 3-step process that will help all of us to create habits that stick. Plus, he points out that habits are even more about emotion than they are about repetition.

Key Points

Information does not lead to action.

It’s a myth that it takes 21 or 66 days to create a habit. Repetition doesn't create habits. Emotions create habits.

People change best by feeling good, not by feeling bad. The feeling of success is what wires in the habit.

A garden is a useful analogy for habits. There is a season for every habit — and they often are not permanent.

Create a tiny habit through an ABC process: anchor moment, a tiny behavior, and instant celebration.

Avoid raising the bar on the tiny behavior. Do more if you want to, but don’t change the standard.

Resources Mentioned

Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything* by BJ Fogg

BJ’s website

Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

How to Tame Your Inner Critic, with Tara Mohr (episode 232)

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Tie Leadership Development to Business Results, with Mark Allen (episode 435)

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Minda Harts: The Memo

Minda Harts is the founder and CEO of The Memo and an advocate for women of color in the workplace. She is a sought-after speaker and thought-leader, frequently speaking on topics of advancing women of color, leadership, diversity, and entrepreneurship. In 2018, Minda was named as one of 25 Emerging Innovators by American Express. Minda has been a featured speaker at TEDx Harlem, Nike, Levi's, Twitch, Bloomberg, Google, LinkedIn, SXSW, and many other places.

She is an adjunct assistant professor of public service at NYU’s Robert F. Wagner Graduate School of Public Service. She also hosts Secure the Seat, a weekly career podcast for women of color. She's the author of the bestselling book The Memo: What Women of Color Need to Know to Secure a Seat at the Table*.

In this conversation, Minda and I discuss the motivation for her work and the reality that recent events have been for women of color in the workplace. Minda shares some of the common obstacles that, good intentions aside, keep white folks from supporting women of color in their careers. Plus, we highlight some of the key offenses white leaders tend to make and how all of us can do better.

Key Points

While many leaders notice and consider the events of the day, the news often hits in a personal way for women of color.

When asked, women of color tend to report that it’s white men who are showing up as sponsors and mentors.

A key trigger point for women of color is to be described as “articulate.”

The word “women” tends to be used as a one-size-fits-all. Be mindful that women don’t all experience the workplace in the same way.

One key action white leaders can take to be a better success partner is ensuring the voices of women of color show up on diversity panels and as speakers.

Resources Mentioned

The Memo: What Women of Color Need to Know to Secure a Seat at the Table* by Minda Harts

Minda’s website

Book Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

Use Power for Good and Not Evil, with Dacher Keltner (episode 254)

What You Gain By Sponsoring People, with Julia Taylor Kennedy (episode 398)

Journey Towards Diversity and Inclusion, with Willie Jackson (episode 441)

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Patrick Lencioni: The Motive

Pat is one of the founders of The Table Group and is the pioneer of the organizational health movement. He is the author of 11 books, which have sold over 6 million copies and been translated into more than 30 languages.

As President of the Table Group, Pat spends his time speaking and writing about leadership, teamwork, and organizational health and consulting with executives and their teams. He is the author of The Motive: Why So Many Leaders Abdicate Their Most Important Responsibilities*.

In this conversation, Pat and I discuss the distinction between reward-centered leaders and service-orientated leaders. We explore the five omissions that reward-centered leaders tend to make and how to avoid these omissions. Plus, Pat introduces his Working Genius model.

Key Points

When leaders are motivated by personal reward, they will avoid the unpleasant situations and activities that leadership requires. -Patrick Lencioni

5 Omissions of Reward-Centered Leaders:

Developing the leadership team

Managing subordinates (and making them manage theirs)

Having difficult or uncomfortable conversations

Running great team meetings

Communicating constantly and repetitively to employees

Many of the reward-focused CEOs I’ve known will attempt to justify their abdication of managing their people by saying, ‘I hire experienced executives and I trust them. They shouldn’t need me to manage them.’ Of course, this is inane. Managing someone is not a punitive activity, nor a sign of distrust. -Patrick Lencioni

Resources Mentioned

The Motive: Why So Many Leaders Abdicate Their Most Important Responsibilities* by Patrick Lencioni

Working Genius assessment (use code COACHING for 50% off)

Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

How to Create an Unstoppable Culture, with Ginger Hardage (episode 350)

How to Lead Meetings That Get Results, with Mamie Kanfer Stewart (episode 358)

Three Stories to Tell During Uncertainty, with David Hutchens (episode 486)

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Julia Taylor Kennedy: Coqual

Julia Taylor Kennedy is an Executive Vice President at Coqual, driving cutting-edge research into the issues impacting today's professional workforce. She led The Sponsor Dividend research and co-authored Disabilities and Inclusion, Mission Critical: Unlocking the Value of Veterans in the Workforce, and The Power of the Purse: Engaging Women for Healthy Outcomes.

She has spoken at the United Nations, the Carnegie Council for Ethics and International Affairs, the Conference Board — and many other places — and she’s been featured in The Washington Post, CBS News, Forbes, Time, and Harvard Business Review. Coqual recently released a new report, titled, The Power of Belonging: What It Is and Why It Matters in Today’s Workplace.

Key Points

A slight uptick in belonging leads to a sizable increase in engagement/loyalty.

White men and women have the highest belonging scores. Black and Asian women have the lowest.

Organizations can move beyond espousing support by setting clear metrics and also inviting in external stakeholders for accountability.

Senior leaders set the tone for what the organization does (or does not do) to support belonging.

While there is not yet enough action from white, straight leaders, there is movement in espoused support and concern for belonging.

Resources Mentioned

The Power of Belonging by Coqual

How to Be an Antiracist* by Ibram X. Kendi

White Fragility: Why It's So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism* by Robin DiAngelo

Related Episodes

What You Gain By Sponsoring People, with Julia Taylor Kennedy (episode 398)

Journey Towards Diversity and Inclusion, with Willie Jackson (episode 441)

Changed My Mind (Dave’s Journal)

Making the Most of Mentoring (audio course)

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Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed

Bonni Stachowiak is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, a professor of business and management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, Bonni was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. She is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide*.

Listener Questions

Joyce asked our advice on organizational culture assessments.

Nina wondered how to create a cohesive culture which allows for unique cultures in each workforce segment.

Bonni and Dave shared some recent technology they are playing with, including 1Password and Readwise.

Resources Mentioned

Human Synergistics

1Password

Readwise*

Related Episodes

The Four Critical Stories Leaders Need For Influence, with David Hutchens (episode 148)

How to Create an Unstoppable Culture, with Ginger Hardage (episode 350)

The Path of Humble Leadership, with Edgar Schein and Peter Schein (episode 363)

Get Smart About Assessments, with Ken Nowack (episode 371)

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Chris Hogan: Everyday Millionaires

Chris Hogan is a best-selling author, a personal finance expert, and a leading voice on retirement, investing, and building wealth. His goal is to help as many people as possible avoid financial traps and set their families up for the future.

His book Retire Inspired: It’s Not an Age; It’s a Financial Number* is a number one national best seller. He is also the author of Everyday Millionaires: How Ordinary People Built Extraordinary Wealth―and How You Can Too*.

In this conversation, Chris and I discuss the national study that his organization conducted on everyday millionaires. We address some of the common misconceptions about millionaires. Plus, we detail both the mindset and behaviors that millionaires have that support the creation of wealth.

Key Points

The top three occupations for millionaires are engineer, accountant, and teacher.

Millionaires steer clear of debt.

Millionaires have a mentality of abundance vs. scarcity. They embrace change and usually see adversity as an opportunity for growth.

Millionaires are frugal, not flashy. They spend less than the general population on groceries, restaurants and clothing.

Employer sponsored retirement plans are a key vehicle the vast majority of millionaires use to build wealth.

Only 1 in 5 millionaires receive any kind of inheritance.

Resources Mentioned

Everyday Millionaires: How Ordinary People Built Extraordinary Wealth―and How You Can Too* by Chris Hogan

Related Episodes

Improve Your Financial Intelligence, with Joe Knight (episode 244)

Four Rules to Get Control of Your Money, with Jesse Mecham (episode 356)

Dumb Things Smart People Do With Money, with Jill Schlesinger (episode 396)

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Andrea Wanerstrand: Microsoft & International Coach Federation

Andrea Wanerstrand is a leadership coach and head of Microsoft Worldwide Learning Coaching Programs. Andrea has 15+ years of international experience in organizations ranging from 50 to over 150,000+ employees. She has a multi-industry background including technology solutions and services, business management consulting, and telecommunications.

Andrea’s expertise is in leading the development and management of large-scale global coaching & leadership development programs specializing in customer centric organizations. In addition to leading the global coaching programs at Microsoft, she is an International Coaching Federation (ICF) PCC certified leadership coach, serves as a current Board Member on the ICF Global Board of Directors, and is a Fellow at the Institute of Coaching – Harvard McLean.

In this conversation, Andrea and I discuss how the conversation about coaching culture started at Microsoft and how they began to bring this intention into practice. Plus, she shares what worked in designed programs for Microsoft leaders that helped in developing coaching skills and support the success of the entire organization.

Key Points

In their report on Building a Coaching Culture with Managers and Leadership, the International Coach Federation and Human Capital Institute say:

Organizations with a strong coaching culture report recent revenue above their industry peer group (51% of organizations compared to 38% of other responding organizations).

Sixty-four percent of respondents in organizations with strong coaching cultures report the presence of all three modalities, compared to 33% of respondents in organizations without strong coaching cultures.

Three modalities of coaching:

Coaching Services: formal global solutions for engaging with point in time development focused coaching (can leverage internal or external coaches).

Coaching Capabilities: in the moment leadership behavior that facilitates empowerment, learning and activates a growth mindset.

Coaching Champions: A common framework and approach to create and support a community of leaders/manager as well as internal coaches who are held to common standards and practices fostering coaching capabilities.

Resources Mentioned

Andrea Wanerstrand

Related Episodes

How to Improve Your Coaching Skills, with Tom Henschel (episode 190)

These Coaching Questions Get Results, with Michael Bungay Stanier (episode 237)

Move Coaching from Theory to Practice, with Jason Weeman (episode 493)

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Oscar Trimboli: Deep Listening

Oscar is a mentor, coach, speaker, and author. He was a director at Microsoft for over a decade and headed up the MS Office division in Australia.

Today, Oscar works with leadership teams and their organizations on the importance of clarity to create change, how to embrace the digital economy, and the role values play in the achievement of your purpose. He is the author of Deep Listening: Impact Beyond Words*.

In this conversation, Oscar details the four habits that tend to derail our listening. We explore the patterns and behaviors of each habit, and how we can work to do better. Plus, Oscar invites us to notice feelings instead of words — as well as HOW people are saying things, not just WHAT they are saying.

Key Points

Four habits that derail listening:

Dramatic Listener

They get engrossed in the emotion and want to become an actor in it. Dramatic listeners tend to get caught up in the problem so much so that they don’t hear the idea or the solution. They may come away from an interaction feeling like they’ve really connected when in fact, they haven’t.

Interrupting Listener

We notice these people the most. They are coming from a place of concern and tend to listen to fix and solve the problem. They finish sentences wrongly and many listen for places to jump in as much as they are listening for the words.

Lost Listener

These listeners tend to zone out and appear not present. Lost listeners may be focused on something else. Technology devices have the potential to distract them substantially.

Shrewd Listener

These listeners are solving the current problem and also the next problem. They may create problems in their own mind that aren’t even what speaker said. They are smart enough not to interrupt, and often appear very engaged, but are not necessarily listening.

Resources Mentioned

Oscar’s Listening Quiz

Deep Listening: Impact Beyond Words* by Oscar Trimboli

The Four Villains of Listening (Deep Listening podcast)

Book Notes

Download my highlights from Deep Listening in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

The Way to Have Conversations That Matter, with Celeste Headlee (episode 344)

Get Better at Deep Listening, with Oscar Trimboli (episode 408)

The Way to Be More Coach-Like, with Michael Bungay Stanier (episode 458)

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Annie Duke: How to Decide

Annie Duke is an author, corporate speaker, and consultant in the decision-making space. As a former professional poker player, Annie won more than $4 million in tournament poker before retiring from the game in 2012.

Prior to becoming a professional player, Annie was awarded a National Science Foundation Fellowship to study Cognitive Psychology at the University of Pennsylvania. She is the co-founder of The Alliance for Decision Education, a non-profit whose mission to improve lives by empowering students through decision skills education.

Annie is the author of Thinking in Bets* and her newest book, How to Decide: Simple Tools for Making Better Choices*.

Key Points

Better decision-making aims to reduce resulting and hindsight bias.

Avoid using a pro/cons list in decision-making, as it tends to reinforce biases you already have.

Use a decision tree to document potential decisions, possible outcomes, and the likelihood those outcomes will occur.

More people being involved in a decision is helpful, assuming you are actually leveraging each person’s independent thinking.

Negative thinking will help you foresee potential problems along the path of your decision so you can do a better job of mitigating issues before they occur.

Resources Mentioned

How to Decide: Simple Tools for Making Better Choices* by Annie Duke

Thinking, Fast and Slow* by Daniel Kahneman

The Checklist Manifesto: How to Get Things Right* by Atul Gawande

The Alliance for Decision Education

Book Notes

Download my highlights from How to Decide in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

How Women Make Stronger, Smarter Choices, with Therese Huston (episode 255)

How to Approach Corporate Budgeting, with Jody Wodrich (episode 355)

How to Ask Better Questions, with David Marquet (episode 454)

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Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed

Bonni Stachowiak is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, a professor of business and management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, Bonni was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. She is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide*.

Listener Questions

Rajat asked us about the best ways to create management structures in his organization.

Cathy wondered how we let things go in moments of personal frustration.

Janet asked advice for forming and sustaining business partnership and alliances.

Resources Mentioned

Leadership and Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box* by The Arbinger Institute

Scaling Up: How a Few Companies Make It...and Why the Rest Don't* by Verne Harnish

Traction: Get a Grip on Your Business* by Gino Wickman

Clockwork: Design Your Business to Run Itself* by Mike Michalowicz

Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap...And Others Don't* by Jim Collins

Related Episodes

Three Keys to Effective Business Alliances, with Aaron Kent (episode 162)

How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke (episode 192)

The Truth and Lies of Performance Management, with Michael Bungay Stanier (episode 361)

Performance Measurement That Gets Results, with Stacey Barr (episode 419)

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