If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus

This tender and deeply resonant episode follows a heartfelt question from listener Cathy: Do I keep talking to my brother, even after all the harm he’s caused?

What unfolds is an intimate exploration of how to stay rooted in our own integrity when we’re torn between love and protection, compassion and accountability, connection and boundaries.  We dive into how to love someone clearly, without collapsing into enabling, appeasing, or pretending.

Cathy shares the painful complexity of loving a sibling who’s caused irreversible harm - some unethical, some illegal - and the grief of wanting connection without pretending the pain never happened.

Warning:  Strong language is used, so be careful if little ones are listening in! 

📝 Shownotes:

• Do you have to forgive to love someone again? (Minute 12)
• What to say when someone you love won’t take responsibility (Minute 20)
• The difference between “enabling” and “accepting” (Minute 27)
• A real-life script to stay honest and kind (Minute 35)
• How to protect your inner child in hard family relationships (Minute 41)
• Why punitive force backfires - and what to do instead (Minute 50)

This episode is a masterclass in the art of loving honestly, and in choosing relationship without gaslighting yourself.

If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus

What if your fiercest judgments were just misplaced devotion?

In this raw and revealing episode, we unpack those charged moments when your love for truth and justice gets mistaken for criticism or control. When your “I just want to help” lands more like “You’re doing it wrong.” And when your longing to belong collides with your need to speak up.

Two powerful stories unfold in this episode:  One about a moment of regret after calling out a fellow trainer in a large group, and another about getting kicked out of a recovery meeting… for being too disruptive. 

But underneath it all? The same longing: to be seen, heard, and held in our full humanity.

💥 Warning: This episode may stir up old wounds. But it also offers hope, tools, and a path to healing. Also, be aware that we sometimes use spicy language so be careful if any little ones are listening, too. 

In this episode, we explore:

• Why your “judgmental” moments might be rooted in love - not criticism
• What to do when you speak from truth but it lands all wrong
• The real difference between empathy and commiseration (and how we often get it twisted)
• What happens when you get banned from a recovery group… and why it’s not the end of your story
• How to apologize without collapsing or giving your power away
• A powerful reframe for those moments when you think, “Ugh, I did it again…”

✨ Whether you’re the one who blurted out too fast, or the one retreating into silence after conflict, this episode will help you find your way back - to yourself, to others, and to what really matters.

🎧 Listen now if you’ve ever:

• Regretted your tone but stood by your message
• Felt like the “too much” one in the group
• Wanted to show up with integrity and connection
• Longed for a do-over, but didn’t know how to start

Resources Mentioned:

Free Communication Starter Kit

Join the Conversations from the Heart Membership for live support and community

Subscribe on YouTube

👉 Like this episode? Share it with someone who’s navigating a relational repair of their own. And remember: you’re allowed to be a work in progress and a force for good.

If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus

Ever felt torn between staying true to yourself and keeping the peace in your relationships? In this episode, we walk with three courageous guests as they navigate the messy middle of relational repair, where heartbreak, hope, and healing often collide.

Throughout the episode, I offer grounded coaching and relational insight, modeling how to make peace with not getting your way, how to advocate without attachment, and how to hold your truth with both gentleness and strength.

Plus, I share my favorite Marshall Rosenberg quote that gives us all permission to show up imperfectly.

The big insight?  Sometimes, the conversation is less about the thing and more about the way we talk about it. Tune in to learn how to shift from “I need you to agree with me” to “Can we co-create a process where we both matter?”

Key Questions Explored

• What do I do when I want something deeply - but no one else agrees?
• How can I reconnect with someone after months or years of silence?
• How do I set boundaries with people who steamroll my needs?
• What if honoring myself means disappointing people I love?

Listener Takeaways/Show Notes 

• A step-by-step process for advocating without demanding
• How to hold space for grief when connection doesn’t go as hoped
• The “thermometer tool” to surface hidden family dynamics
• Language to use when you’re overwhelmed but still want to show up
• How to shift from self-judgment to healthy regret when you’re not perfect

Listen for heart-centered coaching, clear language templates, and real-life examples of relational courage.

If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus

Ever spiraled into shame because of one tiny mistake? Or replayed a text convo with a ghoster, trying to decode what you did wrong? You’re not alone, and you’re not broken. 

In this vulnerable and uplifting episode, Tiffany and Patrice bring raw questions to the table, and I offer some insights into how we talk to ourselves when we feel abandoned, rejected, or ashamed.

This one’s for every tender-hearted human who’s been too hard on themselves - and who’s ready for something softer, wiser, and more freeing.

We discuss:

• 1:10 Opening thoughts
• 2:33 How a wrong phone number on a business card led to a spiral of shame - and the exact steps to stop that spiral mid-spin.
• 11:34 Two strategies in the moment of stress:  pause, and name what's happening
• 12:05 Why reclaiming the word “stupid” could be the most liberating thing you do all week.
• 19:52 What ghosting actually tells you about someone - and how it might be the kindest exit you didn’t ask for.
• 25:47 A note on goodness of fit and how it can enable choicefulness
• 33:19 Comments from the audience
• 45:30 Closing thoughts 

If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus

In this epsiode, we speak with Cathy and Paul.  Cathy is untangling her intentions around gift giving and her desire to be closer to her daughter.  Paul is working to understand an intense emotional reaction after he had a difficult conversation with his partner.

We discuss:

• 3:10 Opening thoughts on the current political climate
• 10:26 How do I discern between my reaction and the reality of a thing?
• 17:46 The sweet spot we're longing for when giving a gift
• 21:30 Finally I feel like an adult!
• 30:18 I am right on time.
• 35:30 Dogs vs. cats
• 41:02 Are you stressed about telling someone a truth?
• 42:13 I had a hard conversation and an intense emotional reaction and I'm not sure why.
• 51:30 Setting an intention to cry
• 55:50 Practical Do's and Don'ts

If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus

How do we stay connected to ourselves - and to others - when our nervous systems are screaming, our inner critics are loud, and old family patterns are tugging us backward?

In this episode, we examine:

• 2:03 I'm struggling in my relationship with my sister.  Why does my body still react to conflict even when my mind knows I'm safe now?
• 7:19 A new, empowering take on going "no contact" (it's not a rejection - it's a reset)
• 13:51 A practical way to set new terms of engagement in relationships that matter, but hurt
• 20:37 I want to set an intention with my family.  How can I best interact with them?
• 29:44 I'm in a place of transition, how can I best connect with myself?
• 50:33 How can I tell if the resistance I'm feeling needs to be worked through or if I need to switch course?
• 55:25 Closing thoughts

If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus

What if every awkward silence, every emotional hijack, every misstep can be used as stepping-stone to circle back to a conversation?  To reconnect.  To build trust, not erode it.

What if "failed" moments aren't actually failures at all, but are simply part of a natural, generative learning process?

Today, we examine moments that feel like failures at the time, but are actually opportunities for greater connection with ourself and others.

We explore:

• 1:01   Intro thoughts
• 2:40  How can I incorporate NVC tools at work?
• 3:45  Step 1:  Observe
• 7:20   The most powerful thing you can do when you're in a position of power
• 14:43  'm angry.  What can I do?
• 23:45  How can I stop judging my family?
• 31:07  A script for revealing ourselves in small ways
• 39:53  Q&A
• 51:10  Closing tips and practices

If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus

In this episode, Jaya brings forward a challenge that many of us can relate to - leaving conversations feeling undermined or devalued.  She struggles with how to maintain her power and self-worth when people dismiss, invalidate, or fail to recognize her contributions.  Her core questions include:

1. How do I keep my power when dealing with people who undermine or devalue me?
2. What language can I use to defend myself?
3. How do I navigate situations where I freeze in response to subtle invalidation?
4. Why do some people always take a contrarian point of view, and how can I respond?
5. How do I handle accusations of being selfish when I set boundaries or withdraw?

Key Takeaways for Listeners

• Shift Your Perspective - Stop seeing these moments as something being done to you and instead as data about the other person's patterns and needs.
• Break the Victim Cycle - Seeing yourself as prey in a predator-prey dynamic keeps you in freeze mode.  Recognizing others' behaviors as their habitual strategies helps reclaim your power.
• Practice Self-Connection - Instead of seeking validation from someone who won't provide it, turn inward and self-attune:  What am I feeling?  What do I need?
• Ask for What You Want - If someone is dismissing your feelings, redirect the conversation by explicitly asking them to focus on your experience rather than rationalizing the other person's behavior.
• Recognize Their Needs - Many people default to giving advice or taking a contrarian stance as a way of meeting their own needs - to feel helpful, competent, or insightful.  Seeing this can help depersonalize their behavior.
• Exit With Grace - If someone is Monopolizing the conversation or invalidating you, set a boundary:  "I just realized I need to get going."  No justification is needed.
• Selfishness vs. Self-Connection - True self-care benefits everyone.  When you act from self-connection rather than obligation, you model healthy relational dynamics.

We Discuss: 

• 1:01 Opening thoughts
• 3:05 I feel undermined and I freeze.  How can I reframe this?
• 12:17 They're not "doing something to me".  They're providing data about themselves.
• 14:28 Asking for what you want as a strategy out of the educating
• 20:51 What can I say if I don't want to listen anymore?
• 28:27 What can I say when someone accuses me of being selfish?
• 31:04 Closing Thoughts

If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus

What happens when we truly listen?  Not just to respond, but to create space for deeper self-awareness?  This rich and layered conversation with Patrice shows how connection-based, collaborative listening results I moving beyond her initial questions into a profound self-discovery process.  

By gently reflecting, naming patterns, and holding space, we allow the layers of meaning to emerge organically--leading to clarity and self-trust.

Listen in as we explore:

• How our initial questions often point to deeper truths we haven't fully named yet.
• The role of reflective listening in helping someone find their own answers 
• Why deep, presence-based conversations create lasting transformation
• How to listen in a way that fosters connection instead of fixing or advising

Looking for a conversation that honors both depth and autonomy?  Listen in now.

Key moments:

• 1:39 Opening thoughts
• 3:03 I want to break a familiar pattern of seeking connection with those who can't offer what I need.
• 10:10 Noticing the presence of both grief and hope
• 17:30 Closing thoughts

If you're looking for a high caliber small group where you can deepen your practice and really live into the principles of compassion, non-violence and relational presence, apply for The Mentorship Circle, which will begin November 2nd. It will be three hours every month of advanced teaching, deep discussion, and practical integration. Learn more here.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Become a member of my online learning community
• Join our calls live
• Set up a private session
• Follow me on TikTok @dr.yvetteerasmus