How to Split a Toaster: A Divorce Podcast About Saving Your Relationships

Divorce and Your Kids: Understanding the Impact and Helping Them Cope with Cathy Himlin


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In this episode of How to Split a Toaster, Seth and Pete dive into the challenging topic of how divorce impacts children. They're joined by special guest Cathy Himlin, a reunification/conjoint family therapist, to discuss the child-centered approach in divorce parenting and what parents need to know to maintain a healthy connection with their kids.

Seth, Pete, and Cathy explore how parents' grief, anxiety, and emotions during the divorce process can affect children. They discuss the concept of "emotional contagion" and how kids pick up on and model their parents' behavior and feelings. Cathy shares insights from her work in court-involved family therapy, explaining how she helps children who have rejected a parent due to the emotional fallout of divorce.

Questions we answer in this episode:

  • How do my emotions during divorce impact my children?
  • What can I do to help my kids cope with the changes and stress of divorce?
  • How can therapy assist in repairing the parent-child relationship after a divorce?

Key Takeaways:

  • Be mindful of how your emotions and behaviors affect your children during divorce
  • Focus on your children's needs and create a safe space for them to express their feelings
  • Seeking professional help, like reunification therapy, can be crucial in maintaining and repairing parent-child bonds

Throughout the episode, Seth, Pete, and Cathy provide valuable advice and strategies for parents navigating the challenges of divorce with their children. They emphasize the importance of validating children's emotions, offering sincere apologies when necessary, and consistently working to maintain a strong, supportive parent-child relationship.

This episode is a must-listen for any parent going through a divorce who wants to better understand their child's perspective and learn practical ways to help them cope with the emotional impact of this significant life change.

Plus, we answer a listener question about social investigations!

Links & Notes

  • Learn more about Cathy at Himlin Consulting
  • Schedule a consult with Seth
  • Got a question you want to ask on the show? Click here!
  • (00:00) - Welcome to How to Split a Toaster
  • (00:27) - Meet Cathy Himlin
  • (01:04) - Parental Grief Impacting the Kids
  • (04:10) - Chidren Impacted from High Conflict Divorces
  • (06:13) - Impact Down the Road
  • (07:28) - Working with Kids Who Reject Parents
  • (09:01) - Getting Them in the Car
  • (10:17) - Court-Involved
  • (12:29) - Triggers for Court-Ordered
  • (13:17) - When It’s Weaponized
  • (14:03) - Different Reasons for Rejection
  • (16:36) - Through the Process
  • (19:58) - When the Child Feels Heard
  • (21:07) - Feeling Pain
  • (22:20) - Apologies
  • (24:14) - Language of an Authentic Apology
  • (28:37) - With Different Ages
  • (32:44) - Permissive Parenting
  • (36:20) - Finding Cathy
  • (38:09) - Listener Question
  • (44:41) - Wrap Up
  • ...more
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    How to Split a Toaster: A Divorce Podcast About Saving Your RelationshipsBy TruStory FM

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