UNDERSTANDABLE

E249 - Why People-Pleasing Ruins Relationships (And How Conflict Heals Them)


Listen Later

► Get Access To Our Courses & Community: https://understandable.net/join/ (Ad)► Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques: https://understandable.net/book/ (Ad)


Why do we people please?

Well, people pleasers subconsciously wish to create harmony & validation in their intimate relationships by agreeing on or doing things, the other person wants.
What they are not aware of is, that these things they agree on or do are not always aligned with their own needs & boundaries and therefore cause a resentment reaction in them.
But even worse, this behavior works not in favor, but against people pleasers and even harms intimate relationships.
In this video, we dive deep into intimate relationship dynamics and understand why people pleasing ruins our relationships
And we will reveal how non-people pleasers and securely attached individuals use honest conflict to heal their relationships.


► Links and Resources:












► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! 

YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠

Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6  Apple Podcasts:https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905

Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠ 

► Episode Timestamps:00:00 Intro

01:08 What Is People Pleasing?
02:27 How People Pleasing Ruins Your Relationship-Life
04:07 People Pleasing And The Central Nervous System
05:43 How People Pleasing Shows Up
07:12 1. The People Pleasing Pathway
08:51 2. The Self Abandonment Pathway
09:51 3. The Conflict Pathway
12:37 Healthy Conflict And Intimacy
16:23 People Pleasing And Ego Stories
17:21 People Pleasing Solution
20:22 Pathways Of Intimacy


► Reach Out To Me :)

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about CPTSD & attachment theory for highly sensitive & neurodivergent people. 

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :) 

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

UNDERSTANDABLEBy Robert Siegers

  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5

5

2 ratings


More shows like UNDERSTANDABLE

View all
Relationship Radio: Marriage, Sex, Limerence & Avoiding Divorce by Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Beam Holmes: Experts in Fixing Marriages & Saving Relationships

Relationship Radio: Marriage, Sex, Limerence & Avoiding Divorce

499 Listeners

Attachment Theory in Action by The Knowledge Center

Attachment Theory in Action

147 Listeners

On Purpose with Jay Shetty by iHeartPodcasts

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

27,018 Listeners

The Thais Gibson Podcast by Thais Gibson

The Thais Gibson Podcast

273 Listeners

Let’s Get Vulnerable: Relationship and Dating Advice by Dr. Morgan Anderson

Let’s Get Vulnerable: Relationship and Dating Advice

1,117 Listeners

The Inner Child Podcast by Gloria Zhang, MA

The Inner Child Podcast

496 Listeners

We Can Do Hard Things by Glennon Doyle and Audacy

We Can Do Hard Things

41,361 Listeners

Unf*ck Your Relationships by Michelle Panning

Unf*ck Your Relationships

207 Listeners

On Attachment by Stephanie Rigg

On Attachment

969 Listeners

Jillian on Love by Jillian Turecki | QCODE

Jillian on Love

1,354 Listeners

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle by Anna Runkle

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle

306 Listeners

Date Yourself Instead by Lyss Boss

Date Yourself Instead

2,353 Listeners

The Mel Robbins Podcast by Mel Robbins

The Mel Robbins Podcast

20,699 Listeners

Our Whole Childhood with Patrick Teahan by Patrick Teahan

Our Whole Childhood with Patrick Teahan

283 Listeners

The Love Doc Podcast by Dr. Sarah Hensley

The Love Doc Podcast

156 Listeners