UNDERSTANDABLE

E249 - Why People-Pleasing Ruins Relationships (And How Conflict Heals Them)


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Why do we people please?

Well, people pleasers subconsciously wish to create harmony & validation in their intimate relationships by agreeing on or doing things, the other person wants.
What they are not aware of is, that these things they agree on or do are not always aligned with their own needs & boundaries and therefore cause a resentment reaction in them.
But even worse, this behavior works not in favor, but against people pleasers and even harms intimate relationships.
In this video, we dive deep into intimate relationship dynamics and understand why people pleasing ruins our relationships
And we will reveal how non-people pleasers and securely attached individuals use honest conflict to heal their relationships.


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► Episode Timestamps:00:00 Intro

01:08 What Is People Pleasing?
02:27 How People Pleasing Ruins Your Relationship-Life
04:07 People Pleasing And The Central Nervous System
05:43 How People Pleasing Shows Up
07:12 1. The People Pleasing Pathway
08:51 2. The Self Abandonment Pathway
09:51 3. The Conflict Pathway
12:37 Healthy Conflict And Intimacy
16:23 People Pleasing And Ego Stories
17:21 People Pleasing Solution
20:22 Pathways Of Intimacy


► Reach Out To Me :)

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about CPTSD & attachment theory for highly sensitive & neurodivergent people. 

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :) 

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

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UNDERSTANDABLEBy Robert Siegers

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