In this episode, Colleen shares a game-changing reframe about why we actually get stuck—even when we have the motivation, the clarity, and the plan. Building on fresh neuroscience from Dr. Kira Babinet, she introduces us to the habenula, a lesser-known part of the brain that slams the brakes on our behavior when failure is perceived—whether it’s already happened or we’re just afraid it might.

Colleen unpacks how the brain’s bias toward failure and loss doesn’t just stall action—it can kill our momentum completely. But instead of forcing progress through pressure or willpower, she offers a gentler, radically effective solution: the iterative mindset. One that removes failure from the equation entirely, replacing it with curiosity, experimentation, and self-compassion. No more proving, no more perfection—just real change, one tiny tweak at a time.

This isn’t about setting better goals. It’s about learning how to stop punishing yourself with the gas pedal when your brain’s already hitting the brakes.

 

 

🔑 Key Takeaways:

 

• The habenula is the brain’s brake pedal—it activates with perceived failure and kills motivation.

• Anxiety is often the habenula’s voice: a signal, not a flaw.

• You don’t need to "learn from failure"—you can shift into iteration instead.

• The iterative mindset removes failure altogether: just test, tweak, repeat.

• Performative SMART goals often create burnout, not progress.

• Motivation flourishes when self-compassion replaces self-criticism.

• You don’t have to earn momentum—you just have to feel safe enough to move.

If you are ready to get support from a community of women who are co-creating this change with intention and clarity— Click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. 

 

Do you want help from Colleen with a situation you’re struggling with? Click here to submit your question for Colleen’s NEW Q& A episodes. Your name will not be mentioned on air! 

 

Find me on:

YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer

TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer

Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer 

X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

 

Transcript