It's Not About the Alcohol

EP255: Why "tough love" doesn't work with substance use and how to set boundaries that actually help with Heather Ross


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Our culture teaches that when someone is struggling with substance use, the correct response is tough love. It's better to let them hit rock bottom than to enable their behavior.

My guest today is Heather Ross, host of the Living While Loving Your Child Through Addiction podcast. She's also a dear personal friend. We're letting you eavesdrop on one of the many raw conversations we've had about the devastating impact the "tough love" mindset has on both the giver and the receiver. And why compassion is not the same as enabling.

You'll hear Heather's first-hand account of what happened when she shifted her goal from controlling the situation to connecting with her daughter. Her story is both heartbreaking and inspiring, because despite losing her daughter to a fentanyl overdose, she will never regret that she was a safe place for her daughter–and a source of unconditional love.

Buckle up, because this one's a tear jerker. But whether you're a parent, partner or just wondering how to show up for someone you love, you'll walk away with a clear understanding of how to release fear, find your ground and support your person without losing yourself.

Click here to get Heather's free guide: A New Perspective about "Enabling"--A guide for parents who want to help their kids but aren't sure how. Find Heather on social media @HeatherRossCoaching, and listen to her podcast Living While Loving Your Child Through Addiction.

If you are ready to get support from a community of women who are co-creating this change with intention and clarity— Click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL.

Do you want help from Colleen with a situation you're struggling with? Click here to submit your question for Colleen's NEW Q& A episodes. Your name will not be mentioned on air!

Find me on:

YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer

TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer

Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer

X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

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It's Not About the AlcoholBy Colleen Freeland

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