Next Up: Narcissism

Episode 28: Portraying Coercive Control in Movies: Purgatory, a Film by Jack Stockley


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“The abuser often maintains that facade of having it together and looking after their partner. It’s that image we tried to set up immediately,” says award-winning director Jack Stockley. He opens up about his true purpose behind his short film “Purgatory,” - to reveal the quiet devastation of coercive control in abusive relationships. By portraying the abuser as charming and well-composed, Jack exposes a disturbing duality that keeps the abused partner isolated and questioning their own reality. His film’s nuanced storytelling challenges viewers to see beyond appearances and recognize the silent suffering hidden beneath the surface.

 

In this episode, Jack joins Dr. Jaime Zuckerman to discuss the behavioral nuances of his film and the often subtle patterns of narcissistic abuse. How do you depict domestic violence without showing physical violence? And what makes coercive control so difficult to recognize, even when it’s happening right in front of us? Jack shares how “Purgatory” uses subtle details, such as visual cues and carefully crafted dialogue, to immerse viewers in the isolating, and often invisible, world of psychological abuse. This episode encourages us to look deeper into the patterns of narcissistic abuse, so that we can recognize red flags sooner. “Purgatory” is not only a compelling film but an essential conversation starter on the realities of narcissistic abuse.

 

Quotes

  • “So you start the film questioning, ‘What’s her problem?’ Right from the beginning, it mirrors how many abusive relationships seem from the outside. You think, ‘Well, she’s a bit messy,’ or ‘He’s holding it all together.’ The abuser often maintains that facade of having it together and looking after their partner. It’s that image we try to set up immediately.” (08:44 | Jack Stockley) 
  • “When a woman leaves a narcissistic, abusive, grossly controlling relationship like that, the time she’s most at risk for harm to herself and her children is when she leaves—or if they find out that she’s going to leave, or right after she leaves. That’s the highest time for violence. So it isn’t simply a matter of just leaving; it’s about leaving safely.” (16:00 | Dr. Z)
  • “As a storyteller, as a filmmaker, to me, those subtle details and nuances that convey coercive control and emotional abuse are the most important. It’s the lifeblood of the film because you have to make it.” (29:33 | Jack Stockley) 
  • “People don’t talk about the fact that rape can exist in a marriage. It can exist in any relationship. It’s not something that happens only between strangers in the park. It’s not a cliché, but people don’t talk about it. People don’t think that it’s a real thing.” (35:19 | Jack Stockley) 
  •  

    Links

    Connect with Jack Stockley:

    Follow Jack Stockley on Instagram: @thereal_jps

    Follow Blue Muse Productions on Instagram: @bluemuseproductions

    Visit Blue Muse Productions YouTube channel to watch Purgatory: https://www.youtube.com/@BlueMuseProductions

    Jack's newest short film - Flying - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jezw_c9UwQs



    Connect with Dr. Z:

    https://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/

    https://www.zgrouptherapy.com/

    https://www.instagram.com/dr.z_psychologist/

    https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.z_psychologist

    https://www.youtube.com/@DrJaimeZuckerman

     

    Shop my new Mindfully Messy hoodie here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/apparel

    Get my FREE breathing exercise here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/newsletter

    Register for my virtual workshops here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/workshops

    Order my workbooks! http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/books




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    Next Up: NarcissismBy Dr. Jaime Zuckerman

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