Evolutionary Men

In this episode of the Heart of Shadow series, Luke Adler and I delve into the nuanced discussion of why men often fear coming forward emotionally, especially in intimate relationships. We explore the idea that while there is a growing expectation for men to be more vulnerable and emotional, there can be a disconnect when men express their emotions and their partners don't respond as expected. We go deep into the changing societal norms around masculinity and the struggles we men encounter as we strive to express our emotions authentically.

In this episode I break down the subtle but important difference between waiting for permission from the outside to take action, and the much deeper capacity to rest in consciousness until we get a clear signal inside ourselves that it's time to act.

This episode explores the concept of masculine leadership via creating shared reality. Shared reality involves mutual understanding and connection, minimizing conflict that arises from a lack of being on the same page. This leadership brings structure, clarity, and context to situations, making implicit things explicit and creating safety along the way.

In this episode, I further bust the lone wolf myth, highlighting how the "pick yourself up by your bootstraps" mentality isn't all we think it to be, and why men grow best in a collective.

In this episode of the Heart of Shadow podcast series, Luke Adler and I talk about the habit of men using ejaculation for self-regulation, and how a powerful alternative is to step more into our experience via checking in with a men's group.

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In this episode, I explore the important difference between integrity and congruence, and how crucially important it is to understand the distinction for nice guys.

This episode is short and sweet and about the important reframe of focusing on a better, not easier life, and how connection and community are the most powerful ingredients for that to happen.

In this episode, I chat with my Heart of Shadow co-facilitator Luke Adler about the common experience of men wanting to understand everything and how that's often a way to resist feeling. We go deep into how this can lead to staying in the realm of the mind and avoiding emotional connection. We explore the power of moving from the head to the heart and body to come into our full power as men.

Inspired by one of my favorite Pearl Jam songs, in this episode I talk about what it means to "Do the Evolution", and its significance in personal growth and development. Drawing from developmental theory, I explore what it means to "do the work" through the lens of subject-object relations and how our awareness evolves allowing us to "see" more and more and thus make different choices in life. 

Video by Pearl Jam

Every intimate relationship will cross a critical, often make-or-break threshold moment in which the two foundational components of polarity and intimacy invert. Tune in to this episode to learn about this important milestone, what often goes wrong, and what tools can support your relationship in thriving beyond this moment.