A woman in our community told me she's heard some mothers say it's easier for wives who love someone suffering from addiction or alcoholism because they can leave their husbands, but a mother's role never ends.

And I lovingly disagree.

True, a married couple with no children can divorce and never speak again. So can a married couple who had a child together. And so can a mother who needs to step away from her addicted son.

Everyone, no matter what the relation to the one suffering from this disease, chooses how to react.

Nobody is helpless. No one gets to throw their hands in the air and just be a victim. There are real tools and practical actions we can take every day that will bring back control and order to our lives and help the ones we love.

We are not powerless over this disease.

You have been doing the best that you could do.

You didn't cause your child or loved one to drink or use drugs, and you are not responsible for their destiny. However, you can find success by helping yourself.

Your job is to become educated by learning the practical tools that will replace your old, enabling behavior and help you find relief and freedom, whether they get sober or not.

I know you feel overwhelmed with all the dysfunction going on in your family. Your greatest fear is that they will run off and get hurt or killed. You might be taking on some unnecessary guilt and your anxiety might be keeping you stuck and feeling helpless. You don't want to break up your family, but you can't imagine living like this forever.

I get it. In this special and non-judgemental community filled with amazing women, we all understand how you feel.

And here's the loving truth: you don't need to put up with abusive behavior.

You can say "no" and risk them being mad at you. You do have the strength to overcome your greatest fears.

The tools in the Love Over Mistakes program (for wives and mothers) might make you feel uncomfortable at first. But you and I both know you've needed to make changes for a while. What you've been doing isn't helping.

The Love Over Mistakes program will help break the cycle of enabling and give you success. You will no longer feel guilty. Instead, you'll have a clear roadmap of what you can do and what you should stop doing to help the one you love and help yourself.

I hope you decide to join us. You are not helpless. There is hope.