By Alex Alexander
Ever noticed how much we talk about romantic, family, and parent-child relationships, while friendships often get the silent treatment?
Welcome to "Friendship IRL," the Podcast where we dive
The podcast currently has 87 episodes available.
Have you ever met someone truly magnetic?
They walk into the room, and suddenly, the energy shifts. People are drawn to them. Some might argue that this is just the way some people were born. They inherited some gene that the rest of us didn’t.
But I believe magnetic individuals are just people who are doing the thing, putting themselves out there and taking action consistently – which over time, creates momentum and that coveted main character energy.
You are the main character in your own life, and when you’re stuck riding somebody else’s waves, it’s easy to lose sight of your own needs and interests! So that’s what today’s episode is about: creating momentum and embodying that main character energy in your own life.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
Resources & Links:
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
A few years ago, I realized that one of my friendship patterns was actually kind of a problem.
I’d show up for my friends as Superwoman, bragging that I could (and would) drop everything and do anything for my friends – even if it meant betraying myself and my own needs. Then, when I really needed help, I’d never ask for it.
I think we all have friendship patterns and tendencies. Some are good. Some are not. What’s important is taking a step back to determine whether they serve our friendships.
We can talk about this stuff in theory, but hearing real stories makes all the difference, and today’s guest, Deb Blum, the CEO and founder of the Whole Soul Way, shares her own tales with truth and vulnerability, from her historical wariness of female friendships to the midlife realization that made all the difference.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
Resources & Links:
Learn about the Whole Soul Way and follow Deb Blum on Facebook and Instagram.
Dive deeper into these ideas and listen to Episode 15, about managing differences in friendships.
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
What are your friendship beliefs? What stories do you tell yourself about your friendships?
Today’s episode might be one of the most important I’ve ever recorded because it gets at the heart of so many people’s struggles: core beliefs about friendship.
Here, I’m joined by Sarah Siegert, founder of Friendships Abroad. Inspired by her own experience moving from Hamburg to London, Sarah is a friendship coach who helps people living abroad create meaningful connections and overcome their loneliness.
As Sarah points out in today’s episode, our relationships start with us. If we want healthy friendships, we have to be willing to do the inner work first.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
Resources & Links:
Check out Episode 42 about friendship trios, which is about developing a close friendship within a group and follow Sarah on Instagram and visit her website.
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
I just want to make friends who are in the same stage of life as me.
In this business, I hear some of the same phrases over and over, and this is one of them. I love that goal, and it’s a big part of what I talk about on the podcast. But recently, I’ve also noticed a trend in which people are seeking friends who are in DIFFERENT life stages.
So that’s what I’m talking about today. Why would you want friends in different life stages than you? And more importantly, how do you make and maintain friendships with people whose current life circumstances are so different from yours?
Personally, I’m looking for a walking buddy, and I feel like that perfect someone might not be a fellow entrepreneur in their mid-30s. What friendships are you looking for in your own life? How might people in different life stages add some richness to your social wellness?
In this episode you’ll hear about:
Resources & Links:
Learn about my Wheel of Connection framework and be sure to check out Episode 77 about female friendships and Episode 15, about managing differences in friendships.
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
One thing I always say is creating a community is the ultimate self-care.
In today’s episode, we dive deep into this idea with my good friend Jenny Dreizen, who is the co-founder of the Fresh Starts Registry, which I’m a huge supporter of.
The Fresh Starts Registry is a registry for all of life’s new beginnings, from divorces to graduations, big moves to scary diagnoses. (Sound familiar? I also talked with Jenny’s sister and co-founder Olivia in Episode 68!)
Jenny is the perfect friend for me to sit down and have this conversation with because so much of her work centers around supporting people through changes and transitions.
BTW, don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t make friends on the internet. Jenny and I have never met in person, yet, I can totally see our friendship spanning 30 years from now.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
Resources & Links:
Learn about small intimacies in Episode 74, check out the Fresh Starts Registry, follow them on Instagram, and listen to Episode 68 to hear my conversion with Fresh Starts co-founder (and Jenny’s sister) Olivia.
Also, don’t forget to listen to their podcast, A Fresh Story (including the episode I recorded with them).
Olivia and Jenny have also written these amazing scripts for what to say when you don’t know what to say.
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
If you’re having a bad day, try bragging about a friend. Talk about that thing they did and why they’re so great – it will turn your whole day around.
Today I’m bragging about my new friend Anna Goldfarb, author of Modern Friendships, which is about the nuances of adult friendships. Anna is a journalist whose reporting has appeared in The New York Times, The Atlantic, The Washington Post and Vox. Her book is absolutely amazing.
You’ll find we have lots of overlap in the ways we think about friendship, but of course, we are different people, and she provides slightly different perspectives and language on the topic.
Today’s episode was such a delightful conversation; it felt like we could talk forever. If you like what I put out on this podcast, be sure to buy her book!
In this episode you’ll hear about:
Resources & Links:
Sign up for Anna’s newsletter and buy her book, Modern Friendships: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections.
Want to hear more about flexible friendship expectations? Check out Episode 33, “The New Version of Friendship,” and Episode 45, about friendship demotions.
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
How do we balance community and independence?
This question is posed by today’s guest, Donna Fields, who, twenty years ago, moved to Spain, and experienced culture shock, going from the United States – an individualistic society – to one that was collectivist and communal.
Donna is an author, professor, teacher, trainer, and host of the podcast Doorways to Learning with Donna. Here, she asks: what do we look for when we leave one place and go to another? For her, it was family and community. But is it possible to be TOO communal?
Spaniards are often extremely family oriented, but is it possible family ties literally tie them down when they could have more experiences if allowed to cut loose? When you move somewhere so different, it makes you wonder: where’s the balance? What feels right to me?
I love episodes like today’s. It feels like we could just be sitting around the kitchen table with a cup of coffee, trying to explore life’s deeper meanings. We don’t answer all the questions, but it sure is an interesting conversation.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
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Donna has compiled some material that will generate fascinating conversations about cultural differences and the natural unions of communities.
Check out Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community by Robert D. Putnam, and if you haven’t yet, listen to Episode 41 about the Liking Gap.
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
Think about your closest friends. Have you ever felt yourself saying, maybe I just don’t know them anymore? Or, why is it so hard for us to get together?
Here’s a question I’m posing for today’s episode: instead of trying to maintain friendships at their “peaks,” what if we allowed these friendships to breathe in their new forms?
Today’s guest is Joseph Suttner, who I met a year ago while on New Day Northwest, a morning TV show here in Seattle. In this episode, Joseph and I talk in-depth about the Wheel of Connection, particularly historic vs. present friendships.
Sometimes it can be sad to admit our historic (and sometimes closest) friendships are no longer at their peaks due to life’s circumstances. But if there’s one constant in life, it’s change, and I think listeners will walk away from today’s episode with new appreciation and perspective of these relationships.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
Resources & Links:
Learn about my Wheel of Connection framework!
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
I’ve been paying more attention to my self talk lately, particularly my negative self talk.
It’s so easy to berate ourselves and give ourselves labels about our interactions. I’m a bad friend. I’m awkward. I’m terrible at small talk. I’m not good at showing up.
But what if instead of saying, I’m awkward, we say, that interaction was awkward, and look at the situation objectively? It’s easier said than done! The important thing is to notice the negative self talk when it happens and try to shift that over time.
In today’s episode, I share three stories about my own self talk. Sometimes I have good self talk. Other times I’m quite mean to myself. My hope is that these stories serve as a reminder that we’re all still working on it, and that’s okay.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
Resources & Links:
Need a cheerleader for your social interactions? I’m here for you! Conquer your friendship anxiety and walk into any room with confidence - join the waitlist now.
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
Today’s topic is female friendship, and to be honest, I’m a little overwhelmed by the responsibility.
I hear your stories about the intensity, cattiness, and drama of female friendships, but to tell you the truth, it’s been a long time since my friendships involved those extreme experiences. Due to my life’s circumstances, I had to approach friendship differently. Friends are my support system, and I will do all I can – even if it’s uncomfortable – to risk losing a friendship.
Which is why I’m so glad to have a female friendship expert on today: Danielle Bayard Jackson, host of the Friend Forward podcast, is a coach, educator, and author of Fighting for Our Friendships, which is a total game-changer and a book I cannot recommend enough.
Today, we talk about all the depth and complexities of this relationship – including, most importantly, the joy of female friendships, which, at their height, allow us to be seen and accepted for who we are.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
Resources & Links:
Follow Danielle on Instagram, listen to the Friend Forward podcast, and buy her book, Fighting for Our Friendships.
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
The podcast currently has 87 episodes available.