In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane address therapeutic separation in the context of betrayal and relational trauma, a topic often talked about but not often understood. They discuss everything from what it is and what it is not to why a therapeutic separation can feel threatening or scary and why (if used correctly and with professional support and guidance) it can be a practical intervention for couples trying to heal their relationships after betrayal.  

A note to our listeners:

We want you to know how sorry we are that it's been so long since we released a podcast episode. Please know that you've been on our minds and in our hearts; it's just been a particularly crazy busy time for us and we're doing our very best to meet the needs of all of our clients, staff, and listeners. Sadly, there just isn't enough time in the day. Please bear with us, we're here for you!  

Feeling stuck can mean a lot of things. In this episode, Marnie and Duane discuss what feeling stuck means in the context of relational healing and betrayal trauma. What does it look like when sobriety has been established but integrity disorder behaviors, abuse, and/or deception continue and trust and safety remain unattainable? How can you as the betrayed partner take care of yourself and get your needs met when the person who has hurt you is incapable or unwilling to take the necessary action to help you heal? This is an important conversation to listen to if you're feeling stuck in healing your relationship and don't know how to move forward with or without your partner.  

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, author and transformational journalist Neil Strauss joins Marnie and Duane once again to continue their conversation about his personal journey of betrayal and healing and the transformative work that changed his life. 

Part 1

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/the-truth-a-conversation-with-neil-strauss/

In this episode of Helping Couples Heal, Marnie and Duane, explore why betrayed partners often still don't feel safe even after sexual recovery has been achieved. 

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane respond to a listener's request for guidance about couple therapy, including when it is and isn't clinically recommended and the indicators that it is too soon or not soon enough. Betrayed partners commonly report that they have been pushed to do therapy as a couple early on in the process before they are ready and while they still feel unsafe. Join Marnie and Duane for this important conversation as they discern early couples work focused on crisis management and safety building from later couple therapy where bonding, connection, repair, and vulnerability are encouraged.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at helpingcouplesheal.com/about

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk with Stan Tatkin - clinician, researcher, teacher, and developer of the psychobiological approach to couple therapy (PACT) neuroscience and the role of attachment theory in healing betrayal and relational trauma.  

Please listen carefully to every word of this interview if you are someone who has betrayed your partner and can't understand why she is as traumatized as she is by your betrayal.  

In this episode, Marnie and Duane discuss the unique and often challenging process of finding the "right" help in the aftermath of betrayal. They stress the importance of a collaborative and systems-focused approach to relational helping and address the potential pitfalls of using a non-relational model, including further trauma.

In this episode, Marnie and Duane address the topic of grieving during the holidays, when loss and grief are often felt more acutely. The holiday season, which extends from Thanksgiving to the beginning of the new year, is a very long stretch of time when there is an expectation of celebration and joy. This can feel very incongruent for those in recovery from betrayal and relational trauma because the mood of someone who is grieving is very contrary to most others' mood during these festive times. 

Marnie and Duane offer some practical suggestions for surviving the holiday season, starting with simply accepting that you are grieving and that it will be different this year. Permitting yourself to make the necessary compromises and adjustments is crucial in making the holidays a bit more tolerable for yourself and your family.

In this episode, Marnie talks to Ryan Angulo, a Los Angeles based Polygrapher who she has been working with since 2008. With differing opinions amongst treatment professionals and clients alike about the efficacy of polygraphs in the context of sex addiction and betrayal trauma recovery, traumatized couples are often left confused, frustrated, and uncertain about whether or not to include the polygraph as a part of their disclosure and healing process. Marnie and Ryan answer the most commonly asked questions and explore the benefits and risks of using the polygraph as a tool to promote relational healing and rebuild trust post sexual betrayal. 

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at helpingcouplesheal.com/about

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop

This episode of the HCH podcast focuses on the shame many betrayed partners' experiences related to their decision to stay in the relationship with the person who betrayed them. In this conversation, Marnie and Duane conceptualize the shame of staying as another burden partners must bear in the aftermath of the discovery of betrayal.  

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at helpingcouplesheal.com/about

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop