Beyond Success

How Sexual Shame is Sabotaging Your Love Life


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“She stares deeply into your eyes, with a playful smile across her face. She races across to the far right corner of the room, and flicks off the switch with her left hand. Your eyes haven’t adjusted to the new lighting, it’s now pitch black, and you can hear her shifting around near the bed…

She’s getting undressed. 

The nerves start to kick in. Your stomach starts to churn. It’s finally happening — and you’re not prepared. After what feels like an eternity, she’s completely naked, with the sheets off, lying on her back in your bed.

She rolls over to her left, makes full eye contact, slowly raises her hand, and curls her index finger. 

She wants you to come into bed.

What do you do?”

The reason why I wrote this short vignette: Many men have a hard time in the bedroom. Even though we love to fantasize about what we’d do, the reality is, many guys still choke up in the bedroom. And the reason for this is sexual shame. 

Sexual shame is:

  • What holds us back from taking the lead role in the bedroom (essential, as research shows the majority of women don’t like submissive guys)
  • What stops us from enjoying sex
  • Feeling like a “creep” or “monster” for simply being attracted to women
  • Guilt over having purely physical desires for sexual contact with someone
  • Feeling overwhelming shame for indulging in some kind of sexual activity or self-pleasure

Obviously, sexual shame is a huge burden among men. And in today’s episode, I reveal how to overcome your sexual shame.

Listen now!

Show Highlights Include:

  • Why your own sexual shame is one of the biggest burdens preventing you from accessing your natural attractiveness (0:25)
  • How the feelings of post-nut clarity psychologically represses you and your ability to find a girlfriend (2:21)
  • The “Good Boy” coping mechanism that distracts you from overcoming your shame (which prevents you from falling in love with the “one”) (3:00)
  • Enjoy flirting and banter by unburdening yourself from your sexual shame (3:34)
  • How to get your girlfriend begging for more by accessing your “Inner-50-Shades-of-Grey” (4:59)
  • “If you leave your sexual shame unexamined, it will sabotage your attractiveness as a man” (38:06)

Does your neediness, fear, or insecurity sabotage your success with women? Do you feel you may be unlovable? For more than 15 years, I've helped thousands of people find confidence, fulfillment, and loving relationships. And I can help you, too. I'm therapist and life coach David Tian, Ph.D. I invite you to check out my free Masterclasses on dating and relationships at https://www.davidtianphd.com/masterclass/ now.

For more about David Tian, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/about/

Emotional Mastery is David Tian's step-by-step system to transform, regulate, and control your emotions... so that you can master yourself, your interactions with others, and your relationships... and live a life worth living. Learn more here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/emotionalmastery

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Beyond SuccessBy David Tian

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