Welcome! and Thank you for listening.
Cruel Jewel was not the outcome that I was looking for with regard to finishing. The details are shared in this podcast.
The questions came earlier. Am I too old, too slow to run these races? Why am I doing this to myself? At 48 hours post race it sank in. It is more about the start line than the finish line. It is about taking a chance on the unknown. I had the opportunity to confront a struggle that I chose which is different from having a struggle cast upon me.
I was able to experience that moment when all that exists is now. I focused on the trail. I watched for snakes, turns, rocks and roots. I climbed for miles and pushed my limits. I practiced going down through roots and rocks. I heard birds, saw beautiful rocks and traversed lush green forests (some secondary to poison oak). I experience the struggles of others and the help and encouragement of strangers and friends. I felt immense peace in the struggles. I am better for having started. My finish line came earlier on Saturday, but I am anxious and grateful for the ability to find another start line and all the unknowns that it will bring.
Each time I start, I learn and grow. Rarely is it perfection as defined by the outcome. It is not so different from life. We plan and rehearse, but the reality is that life is often much different. It is not so bad, if we learn to enjoy the journey. Thank you for listening to my journey.
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